The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: montydog on February 01, 2021, 06:53:26 PM
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Hello everyone,,
New month, new album available on Bandcamp : https://alanwalker1.bandcamp.com/album/sunshine-2
This is the first song on the album which I do hope you like and give your feedback on either way. Something a little different from my usual arrangement for this song which is in memory of the best friend I lost over 10 years ago. It still hurts.
https://soundcloud.com/alan-walker-4/there-were-times
There were times
When days were longer
Our voices stronger
When we were young
The wind was softer
Sun was warmer
And our lives
Had just begun
When the songbird
Flies for the winter
To the warmth
Of distant shores
I'll will cherish
Our days together
Now we can't make them
Anymore
This is just my simple song for you
To say thank you
All these ancient words I wrote for you
Are still brand new
They still ring true
I still miss you
But life is sweet
And death is bitter
Nothing I say
Can ease the pain
As we pass
Through worlds of wonder
Always your face
Always the same
I can hear
The church bells ringing
Skylark singing
In fields of green
Across the valley
The sound of laughter
Just like the way
It's always been
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There is a great deal of emotion and strength in this song @montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) . I can feel your sadness at this loss while at the same time I'm feeling some of the positive feelings that linger on from your time together.
Really powerful production.
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Vocals sounding a little like Roy Orbison crossed with Chris Isaak!
Lovely tribute to your friend, sadly many of us are at the stage of life when we are looking back at those we lost.
Both the arrangement and the lyrics are nicely uncluttered and I like the change-up in the chorus: brings an emotional directness that really hits home.
Nice work and best of luck with the album,
Kevin
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Hi Alan, congrats on getting the album out. The artwork is a good sell for it, for a start.
I read this before listening and thought the lyrics very touching. You’ve used that bitter/sweet contrast to describe life, as I’ve just done independently in my latest song on here. So on the basis of great minds thinking alike, I’ve got to admire these sensitive yet somehow heartwarming lyrics very much. :D
The backing track was more upbeat than I was expecting, but I realised it was more about a celebration of life, not just bitterness of the loss. So it was easy to go along with that mellifluous pathway.
The vocal was very soothing and reassuring really, making the listener feel some comfort in the face of the harshness of loss. A very touching recollection of your friend and the life you had together, with a melody that made me, as a listener, sail effortlessly away into private contemplation.
Great opener for the album. I hope it does well for you. ;)
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@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Alan, good luck with the record.
And you're right, its a bit different with the synths and the reverbed vocals, but you soon get past them and concentrate on the lyrics and vocals. and then it transitions intro the chorus with the organ.
So when you come back to verse 2 you're treading familiar territory and then you get the fab solo.
It ends up sounding like a updated classic
Thanks for sharing
:-)
neil
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Hi Alan
Great track - a bit different from you but your smooth vocals and poignant lyrics sell it well.
The contrast between upbeat music and sad lyrics works in this one.
Just a tad long for me but you knew I was going to say that..
Good work - and best of luck with the new album :D
Paul
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A universally identifiable theme. Great lyrics. Great vocals. Couldn't help thinking about Marty Robbins when I heard our vocals. This was (in my opinion) a really high level accomplishment.
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Love the contrast of quite a timeless and slightly melancholy melody that would sound equally well placed over a slow acoustic strumming track, but put against this more upbeat and lively backing. I like the sax solo too - didn’t see that bit coming and it fits really well. I also hear a touch of Roy Orbison in the vocals
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@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Hi Alan, good luck with the album. Vocal apart, his is such a different sound to what I expected. The contrast between the lyric and the upbeat arrangement is striking. Your smooth vocal holds it together. Some nice sounds and the sax solo was really good.
Nice one!
Cheers
Jamie
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@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
I too can hear a bit of Roy Orbison about this. A great vocal throughout. I Drove All Night springs to mind, though obviously a totally different song. A very full production which really does the song justice. I like the sax and I'm always a sucker for Hammond organ sounds. Nothing I can criticise here. This is great. :)
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A heartfelt and sincere tribute so not something that should be analysed like a normal song. I'm very impressed that you don't stand still, and this is unexpectedly dancy and really works well with your vocal.
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Beautiful lyrics and a lovely tribute to your friend. It's more upbeat from a musical perspective than I expected but I think that works really well. As always, that lovely rich vocal.. beautiful delivery.. great sax vocals and I love they organ under it - works really well!
Great stuff altogether...
Good luck with the album @montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) !! I'll go check it out!
K
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Beautifully written lyrics Alan. There's is much to reflect on here: the passing of youth, a feeling that perhaps our best days are behind us and the awareness that the end of our lives is imminent. I live the verse that centres upon 'the ancient words I wrote for you'.
Musically, this one is wearing a very different suit of clothes to your usual style. The saxophone at the nd is delightful. Lovely clearly vocals and full production but for me, the highlight is the considered lyrics, poignant to any sentient being who reflects upon lifes rich and sometimes rock your road.
Paul
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I was surprised by the song, the intro
and then your voice has put everything in her place.
Good song, as always, good mix and new style. I love the arrangement and how you have handled the melodies with your voice.
Once again I am your fan fan fan.
The casual contrast of the instrumental base with the depth of your voice and the story give it a very particular style that accentuates the depth of the lyrics.
Very good idea of the sax, I love it @montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Stay safe
Mora
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Well everything been said that I would say about this song, so I'll just say that I really like this new sound Alan, even though I love what you normally do :-* it's good to break away sometimes and this sentimental song somehow suits the upbeat vibe :) Good luck with your new album. I'll check it out :)
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Hi Alan.........absolutely a great mixture of your voice and the melody.
The music creates a warm and surreal atmosphere. Has that epic western soundtrack quality................wow, and here comes a sax?
Very cool, and full of surprises!
Nice work......a great track!!!
-Tom
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Oh, I absolutely LOVE the lyrics!!! Made me think of a phrase from an old Rush song:
Summer's going fast
Nights growing colder
Children growing up
Old friends growing older
Anyway, back to your song. I must say I have really enjoyed the way you have ventured into new musically territory lately but for this one I'd say would have worked better in your "old" style, think I Have Taken To Walking. Nothing wrong with the current version but given the lyrics it just did not feel right for me (but that is just me of course). Respect for moving out of your comfort zone though! And fab vox delivery of course, that never changes regardless of backing track.
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@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Very touching lyrics and a heartfelt vocal... the melody certainly pulls at the heart strings too...it’s melancholic yet warming... if Roy Orbison and Vince Clark got together, then this gem is what I can imagine those power houses creating... and like the best songs gets better with each listen👌
After a fourth listen, I can confirm, I love it!
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@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) - Blimey what a departure from your usual stream, @man made material (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22704) - Vince meets Roy, very good.
Great idea - Like the arrangement, and the intimacy of the vocal, you eat this kind of thing for breakfast.
All the best with your Album.
Rich
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This is quite different from you Alan @Montydog with the dance type synth adding a different dimension. You carry it off very well and the whole arrangement is very well put together. Good luck for the new album
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Glad I put off commenting on this initially as I wasn’t sure about the change in style...but when I came back for another listen, I liked it much more than I first thought I did. I could always understand (I think) the idea of not letting the emotion and sentiment behind the song drag it towards the gloomier side of things and think it worked very well towards that goal.
I thought the sax was a little “Benny Hill” if I’m honest...I shut my eyes and could see half a dozen beauties in high heels and lingerie, running around a football pitch at video cassette recorder fast-forward speed, being chased by Bob Todd in a vicars outfit with one side of his dog collar standing to attention.
So I loved that element, obviously 😀
Lyrics are very tidily put together...and convey how you feel about the loss without ever veering off into slush...which might well happen to lesser talented lyricists. I thought it was really honest and quite clever to point out in the lyric how the words have all been said before...but that’s not to diminish their power and feeling. Quite the reverse, really. Vocals are bang on the money once again.
Lovely tribute.
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Thanks to all who took the time to comment - much appreciated.
There is a great deal of emotion and strength in this song @montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) . I can feel your sadness at this loss while at the same time I'm feeling some of the positive feelings that linger on from your time together.
Really powerful production.
@Unclenny (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22611) Thank you for the kind words. This song came from a deep emotional place.
Well everything been said that I would say about this song, so I'll just say that I really like this new sound Alan, even though I love what you normally do :-* it's good to break away sometimes and this sentimental song somehow suits the upbeat vibe :) Good luck with your new album. I'll check it out :)
@crystalsuzy (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18947) Thank you. It's good to try a new approach which I think worked here.
I was surprised by the song, the intro
and then your voice has put everything in her place.
Good song, as always, good mix and new style. I love the arrangement and how you have handled the melodies with your voice.
Once again I am your fan fan fan.
The casual contrast of the instrumental base with the depth of your voice and the story give it a very particular style that accentuates the depth of the lyrics.
Very good idea of the sax, I love it @montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Stay safe
Mora
@moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) Kind words - thanks and for taking the trouble to listen.
Beautifully written lyrics Alan. There's is much to reflect on here: the passing of youth, a feeling that perhaps our best days are behind us and the awareness that the end of our lives is imminent. I live the verse that centres upon 'the ancient words I wrote for you'.
Musically, this one is wearing a very different suit of clothes to your usual style. The saxophone at the nd is delightful. Lovely clearly vocals and full production but for me, the highlight is the considered lyrics, poignant to any sentient being who reflects upon lifes rich and sometimes rock your road.
Paul
@Wicked Deeds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19231) Many thanks, Paul. Your insight is spot on as usual.
Beautiful lyrics and a lovely tribute to your friend. It's more upbeat from a musical perspective than I expected but I think that works really well. As always, that lovely rich vocal.. beautiful delivery.. great sax vocals and I love they organ under it - works really well!
Great stuff altogether...
Good luck with the album @montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) !! I'll go check it out!
K
@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820) Thanks for the great comments - it means a lot coming from you.
A heartfelt and sincere tribute so not something that should be analysed like a normal song. I'm very impressed that you don't stand still, and this is unexpectedly dancy and really works well with your vocal.
@adamfarr (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20124) Just wanted to try something different which is always a challenge. Thanks for commenting.
@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
I too can hear a bit of Roy Orbison about this. A great vocal throughout. I Drove All Night springs to mind, though obviously a totally different song. A very full production which really does the song justice. I like the sax and I'm always a sucker for Hammond organ sounds. Nothing I can criticise here. This is great. :)
@ChrisPrice (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22723) Thank you - I'll take the Roy Orbision comparison with no hesitation. Pleased that you liked the song and the performance.
@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Hi Alan, good luck with the album. Vocal apart, his is such a different sound to what I expected. The contrast between the lyric and the upbeat arrangement is striking. Your smooth vocal holds it together. Some nice sounds and the sax solo was really good.
Nice one!
Cheers
Jamie
@Jamie (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19125) Thank you. Your approval is good to have especially when I'm out on a limb with this one.
Love the contrast of quite a timeless and slightly melancholy melody that would sound equally well placed over a slow acoustic strumming track, but put against this more upbeat and lively backing. I like the sax solo too - didn’t see that bit coming and it fits really well. I also hear a touch of Roy Orbison in the vocals
@The Holographic Rodeo (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22741) Thank you. I do like a sax solo every now and then.
A universally identifiable theme. Great lyrics. Great vocals. Couldn't help thinking about Marty Robbins when I heard our vocals. This was (in my opinion) a really high level accomplishment.
@hardtwistmusic (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19215) Hi, good to hear from you again and so pleased you liked the track.
Hi Alan
Great track - a bit different from you but your smooth vocals and poignant lyrics sell it well.
The contrast between upbeat music and sad lyrics works in this one.
Just a tad long for me but you knew I was going to say that..
Good work - and best of luck with the new album :D
Paul
@Paulski (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19241) Too long??!! Twas over in a thrice!
@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Alan, good luck with the record.
And you're right, its a bit different with the synths and the reverbed vocals, but you soon get past them and concentrate on the lyrics and vocals. and then it transitions intro the chorus with the organ.
So when you come back to verse 2 you're treading familiar territory and then you get the fab solo.
It ends up sounding like a updated classic
Thanks for sharing
:-)
neil
@Neil C (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18856) Updated classic eh? Definitely take that as a compliment. Thanks for listening.
Hi Alan, congrats on getting the album out. The artwork is a good sell for it, for a start.
I read this before listening and thought the lyrics very touching. You’ve used that bitter/sweet contrast to describe life, as I’ve just done independently in my latest song on here. So on the basis of great minds thinking alike, I’ve got to admire these sensitive yet somehow heartwarming lyrics very much. :D
The backing track was more upbeat than I was expecting, but I realised it was more about a celebration of life, not just bitterness of the loss. So it was easy to go along with that mellifluous pathway.
The vocal was very soothing and reassuring really, making the listener feel some comfort in the face of the harshness of loss. A very touching recollection of your friend and the life you had together, with a melody that made me, as a listener, sail effortlessly away into private contemplation.
Great opener for the album. I hope it does well for you. ;)
@MichaelA (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21274) Many thanks for the detailed, thoughtful review.
Vocals sounding a little like Roy Orbison crossed with Chris Isaak!
Lovely tribute to your friend, sadly many of us are at the stage of life when we are looking back at those we lost.
Both the arrangement and the lyrics are nicely uncluttered and I like the change-up in the chorus: brings an emotional directness that really hits home.
Nice work and best of luck with the album,
Kevin
@kevysc (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19775) Many thanks for the kind words. Chris Isaak? He's a great singer and I don't think I'm anywhere near but I'll take it anyway!
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Hi Alan.........absolutely a great mixture of your voice and the melody.
The music creates a warm and surreal atmosphere. Has that epic western soundtrack quality................wow, and here comes a sax?
Very cool, and full of surprises!
Nice work......a great track!!!
-Tom
@IronKnee (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20409) Many thanks for the kind words - it is appreciated.
Glad I put off commenting on this initially as I wasn’t sure about the change in style...but when I came back for another listen, I liked it much more than I first thought I did. I could always understand (I think) the idea of not letting the emotion and sentiment behind the song drag it towards the gloomier side of things and think it worked very well towards that goal.
I thought the sax was a little “Benny Hill” if I’m honest...I shut my eyes and could see half a dozen beauties in high heels and lingerie, running around a football pitch at video cassette recorder fast-forward speed, being chased by Bob Todd in a vicars outfit with one side of his dog collar standing to attention.
So I loved that element, obviously 😀
Lyrics are very tidily put together...and convey how you feel about the loss without ever veering off into slush...which might well happen to lesser talented lyricists. I thought it was really honest and quite clever to point out in the lyric how the words have all been said before...but that’s not to diminish their power and feeling. Quite the reverse, really. Vocals are bang on the money once again.
Lovely tribute.
@PaulAds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20253) Thanks for the review. Benny Hill? Hmmmm. I know exactly what you mean:-)
This is quite different from you Alan @Montydog with the dance type synth adding a different dimension. You carry it off very well and the whole arrangement is very well put together. Good luck for the new album
@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) Many thanks for the kind words.
@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) - Blimey what a departure from your usual stream, @man made material (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22704) - Vince meets Roy, very good.
Great idea - Like the arrangement, and the intimacy of the vocal, you eat this kind of thing for breakfast.
All the best with your Album.
Rich
@cowparsleyman (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21308) Thank you for your review. The vocals are definitely the easy bit of this process - I think that was the 2nd take all done in one pass but I knew the song inside out before I recorded it.
@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
Very touching lyrics and a heartfelt vocal... the melody certainly pulls at the heart strings too...it’s melancholic yet warming... if Roy Orbison and Vince Clark got together, then this gem is what I can imagine those power houses creating... and like the best songs gets better with each listen👌
After a fourth listen, I can confirm, I love it!
@man made material (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22704) After 4 listens I'd be throwing myself on the traps! Well done for the perseverance! Seriously, thanks for the kind words and the comparisons.
Oh, I absolutely LOVE the lyrics!!! Made me think of a phrase from an old Rush song:
Summer's going fast
Nights growing colder
Children growing up
Old friends growing older
Anyway, back to your song. I must say I have really enjoyed the way you have ventured into new musically territory lately but for this one I'd say would have worked better in your "old" style, think I Have Taken To Walking. Nothing wrong with the current version but given the lyrics it just did not feel right for me (but that is just me of course). Respect for moving out of your comfort zone though! And fab vox delivery of course, that never changes regardless of backing track.
@Jambrains (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19875) I think the different approach seems to be a hit with the majority but I take on board what you say.
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This atmospheric jewel sounds epic! This is a fantastic mix and recording. Reminds me of Gordon Lightfoot quality recordings. Great, great vocals...your timbre is..........blessed.
A very nicely written song!
Awesome,
-Tom