The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Bostonfan2 on July 04, 2020, 10:41:03 PM
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*updated* - Revised version, Thanks again for the great feedback !
Thought I would share this one with you all, Its meant to be a change of pace tune to break up
the Rockers on an upcoming E.P. for Spotify. I dont think its strong enough on its own, but hopefully
good enough to do the job! Lyrically I think it can mean different things to different people, but for me
its a song about a Journey that is Spiritual in nature. Any thoughts on it welcome, Thanks!
I would post the lyrics but....its a lyric video I did for it:)
&feature=youtu.be
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Wow, what a fantastic well produced professional sounding song, I loved it. The vocals are superb and the lyrics are very emotive. The guitar work throughout is 1st class, particular highlights are when the acoustic comes in and the soaring lead break in the middle. I really enjoiyed it.
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Top quality recording and a really good song...should work great in between a couple of rockier numbers...as it still has some guts to it despite being fairly laid back.
I wondered if the guitar lead guitar was a tiny bit out of tune here and there? Probably not...I'm just having a right carry-on with a couple of my guitars lately...and that's probably spilled over into my listening!
Enjoyed it a lot!
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Yes, this is great stuff Ray - Vocals are superb. Would be a great song to break up the set with. Excellent paying and production although I do agree with Paul that the geetar is just a wee tad out of tune - easily fixed though. There's a really interesting structure to the song as well which seems to be a trademark of yours. Great stuff :)
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@Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532) - Thank You very much for your nice thoughts , means alot👍
@PaulAds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20253) - Thanks man! Yeah was having a nightmare of time with the lead
Guitar And I think it’s slightly sharp in spots. Appreciate you checking
It out and your thoughts 👍
@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) - HI John, glad you think it could be a good fit for a change of pace!
I have been wanting to do something with the acoustic for awhile.
Thanks also for mentioning the tuning on the lead as well, would be
Great to have it spot on.
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@Bostonfan2 (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22448)
Hi, love the vocals, they were great! I too agree with the comment about the lead tuning.There was a descending guitar theme you played through a couple of times about 60% through that I would have developed a bit more, it sounded good.
Nice one!
Cheers
Jamie
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Really good tune here....LOVE the vocals and the arrangement.
I also picked up on that minor tuning issue.
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Wow very impressive vocal that’s some poweful lungage you have there! Really nice melodies in the acc guitar kind of Towsend circa Tommy era very uplifting. I’d like to hear it break down quiet and build up with a rising rhythm and your wicked guitar riff. :)
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Wow that harmony coming in at the start is gorgeous.. Lovely song, great vocal.. and as the others have said, great arrangement.. Great stuff @Bostonfan2 (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22448) ..
K
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Hey BF - I think this one does exactly what it says on the tin. Lovely respite from the rockers and especially great harmonies. To be honest, with the addition of a chorus it could be a great ballad on its own, but the atmosphere is super all through.
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@Jamie (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19125) - Hi Jamie, Thanks for checking it out & glad you dig the Vocals! :)
@Unclenny (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22611) - Glad you dig the tune & Vox! it was a fun one to put together.
@simonjol (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22633) - Definitely not me on vocals! (ask John ..lol ) The Guy on Vocals is Chris Sligh
He definitely has alot of power when he wants to use it..:) Thanks for the
comment on the acoustic, I haven't played it in years and it was fun to be able
to use the 12 string for these open type chords!
@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820) - Thank You for your nice comments! this was my first attempt at any type of video
yours are always amazing!
@adamfarr (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20124) - Hi Adam, thanks for confirming the intended us of this piece, I have thought about developing it more later!
I have since re - tracked the Lead guitar (solid A440...haha) and doing the remix, thanks again everyone for the great feedback! .......Ray
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@Bostonfan2 (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22448) - Ooops, too late, it's gone. Video removed
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Link should work now :)
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Definitely hear the Boston, Foreigner influence and this is very well put together. Perhaps bring the drums up slightly, but very polished and accomplished work.
Kevin
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Definitely hear the Boston, Foreigner influence and this is very well put together. Perhaps bring the drums up slightly, but very polished and accomplished work.
Kevin
Thank You Kevin! The drums could use a slight bump, Thanks for your thoughts!
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Great song and great vocals, lovely acoustics guitars, tons to like here. A good build as well, nice solo, I can hear a second solo guitar harmony there (well, in my head at least)
but.... to me the drums are far to lame to take full advantage of the build. One is expecting this large-than-life sound towards the second half and one get Ringo Starr?!?! ;D
Bass is a little adventurous imo, think i's doing a little to much and too high up on the fret board leaving the oh so very important low end a little empty towards the latter half.
Think some bass player once said "there is no money above the 5th fret" and I think he has a point.
Anyway, fab in many ways, get some more power/punch to the bass and drum in the latter half and you have a killer track.
Well done!
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Great song and great vocals, lovely acoustics guitars, tons to like here. A good build as well, nice solo, I can hear a second solo guitar harmony there (well, in my head at least)
but.... to me the drums are far to lame to take full advantage of the build. One is expecting this large-than-life sound towards the second half and one get Ringo Starr?!?! ;D
Bass is a little adventurous imo, think i's doing a little to much and too high up on the fret board leaving the oh so very important low end a little empty towards the latter half.
Think some bass player once said "there is no money above the 5th fret" and I think he has a point.
Anyway, fab in many ways, get some more power/punch to the bass and drum in the latter half and you have a killer track.
Well done!
Well I love Ringo....haha.... Thanks man for your thoughts on it!
I may revisit this one later and Ill definitely keep those ideas in mind :)
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Hi
Great song. Really enjoyed listening to this. Accompanies my reflective mood perfectly. Beautiful vocals/lyrics. Very pro sounding
production. Would work very well for a 'change of pace' on an album, but I also think, with a fuller production and a bit more work on that lovely build
you've got going (never seemed to reach its' climax ) it could be a Classic ;D ;D ;D
Loved it..
take care...stay safe ;D
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Think this may be the first of yours I have heard - fantastic listen. It really is beautifully sung, and this is enhanced by top notch vocal production. It's an absolutely gorgeous song too, and right up my proverbial street - I would love to hear more from you, it would sit easy in my Sonos playlists. I thought the drums and percussion needed to cut through the mix a little more. It might be a case of EQ and subtle compression adjustment rather than just yanking up the volume.
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@Binladeda (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18620) - Thank You! Appreciate your thoughts on it, and I may just do that:)
@Bill Saunders (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18525) - Hi Bill, glad you liked it! drums definitely could be better.
Thanks for your thoughts and appreciate your comments!
Cheers, Ray
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Yep, I can see this working very well as the slow track among rockers. The playing is great and it's a classical example of the genre. A chorus would have lifted it to epic proportions but I like it as it is. I think this would work well with just the vocal and an acoustic guitar. Great song.
M