The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Grubstar on June 21, 2020, 05:29:09 PM
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Hi, here’s a new song that we’ve just completed featuring a female singer MizAgata who has occasionally provided the vocals on a number of our songs.
The Dreamroad is quite a bittersweet song which we tried to write with just enough ambiguity in the verses to allow the listener (hopefully) to use their own imagination as to what is going on in the narrative.
The chorus is of course a simple metaphor for life touching upon love, redemption and the passage of time.
I hope you all enjoy it and I look forward to any comments.
https://soundcloud.com/grubstar1/the-dreamroad
The Dreamroad
I got a letter from a friend
Someone I once held dear
It’s the beginning or the end
She didn’t make it clear
I thought about it for a while
Where did it all go wrong?
The past can fade just like a smile
But never lasts too long
It’s not too late to change
Before we grow too old
Life’s never easy when you step
Upon the Dreamroad
It’s not worth crying
If we find it’s only fool’s gold
Love sometimes leaves you If you slip
Upon the Dreamroad
I’ve seen the face behind the veil
The coldness in her eyes
The story of a cruel betrayal
That nothing could disguise
I heard the sirens in the night
Howling from the cold
So many stories yet to write
Must now remain untold
It’s not too late to change
Before we grow too old
Life’s never easy when you step
Upon the Dreamroad
It’s not worth crying
If we find it’s only fool’s gold
Love sometimes leaves you If you slip
Upon the Dreamroad
It’s not too late
It’s not worth crying
© 2020 Atkin & Williams
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I liked this a lot guys. Great lyrics up to interpretation as you say. It's got a poppy, early 80s vibe which you seem to pull off very well. Great vocals, instrumentation and production. Well done all :)
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Hi there Grubstar, very slick, positive and driving synth pop. It reminded me a bit of early Pet Shop Boys. The vocalist has a good voice for this kind of thing. Some nice counter melodies come in towards the end too and the chorus has just the right amount of wind beneath its wings.
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Very nice - definitely Atkin and Williams with a touch of the Bangles. Great 80s synths and melodic arrangements. Nice "impressionist" lyrics too (also very 80s I think) which open the door a little on a potential backstory (or do they?) and just somehow sound good together.
Very enjoyable.
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Hola @Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532)
Your song is really well produced, the arrangement and mix goes fine ant he singer is wonderful!!!
I think your song could go well on any platform, its construction is perfect and the chorus is very well applied and developed . :)
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Excellent song, in my opinion. Nice contrast between the positive vibe of the music and the rather sad lyrics. Beautiful singing! I can easily imagine it a big radio hit, with a chorus that sticks to you instantly, like superglue.
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What a fab song, love the vocal and the close harmonies in the chorus...all round fabness, production, arrangement..just super, :) 8)
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This is so cool. as mentioned above I also got a Bangles vibe (which I love)
very nice voice, lyrics & melody all shine with a tight groove that holds it together.
Nice addition for the playlist :)
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Many thanks to all those who gave our song a listen and particular thanks to those who took the time out to comment in particular;
@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) Many thanks PJ your comments and kind words are appreciated.
@PaulyX (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21034) Cheers mate, thanks a lot for the positive comments.
@adamfarr (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20124) Hi Adam, thanks again for the support and kind words.
@moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) Hola Mora, many thanks, your review it is much appreciated.
@The Estuary (SWE) (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22380) Cheers man, thanks for the great comments.
@shadowfax (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20024) Hi SF thanks for the great review it really measn a lot.
@Bostonfan2 (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22448) So glad that you liked the song and thanks for taking time to make such positive comments.
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Sort of Pet Shop Boys meets Bangles, me like. Only two comments re the mix, think the vocals could come up a bit and overall the mix is a little light on low end, not sure i it the mix or simply the instrumentation lacking a bit in the low end. Really catchy and great vocals, well done!
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@Jambrains (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19875) Thanks for taking the time to review our song it is much appreciated also thanks for the comments regarding the mix Its an area I am always trying to improve on, so thanks for the feedback.
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@Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532)
Hi, really well constructed and recorded song with a great vocal. Got an 80's feel as others said and I too thought of the Bangles and Pet Shop Boys, nice company to keep! I think the vocals could come up a bit and also push the bass end a bit more!
Nice one!
Cheers
Jamie
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Yeah...really love this one...right up my street!
Still a great 80's feel to it...but I think the brilliant female lead vocal gives it a more contemporary appeal too.
I don't want to ramble off into some long-winded bollocks except to say that I loved it!
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@PaulAds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20253)@Jamie
Hi guys, many thanks to both of you for the positive reviews, it is much appreciated. Cheers.
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Agree with the comments regarding Bangles and Pet Shop Boys, very solid and catchy 80s pop vibe, well done
Kevin
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Fabulous song by you guys! :) Very 80s vibe for sure, but it is rocking! The singing is fantastic, lyrics really well, and nice production and playing too!
Well done! :)
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@Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532) - Excellent work, loved the arrangement, and those hooky fx.
She's a wonder, ain't she? everything is right, a pop hit if ever I heard one.
Totally on the '80's pop button, very slick and I wish I did it...
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Hey @Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532) - I really liked this.. Great lyrics and such a lovely poppy melody and arrangement.. Love the vocal - a perfect fit for this little piece of (80s-sounding) magic! Super catchy!
K
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Many thanks to everyone who has taken time out to listen to our song 'The Dreamroad' it really is very much appreciated, in particular special thanks to;
@kevysc (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19775) Many thanks Kevin your positve comments mean a lot.
@Andreas (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22101) Hi Andreas, many thanks for your kind words.
@cowparsleyman (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21308) Hi CPM thanks for reviewing our song in such a positive lights, it is very encouraging. Respect.
@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820) Hi many thanks for your review and such lovely comments.
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@Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532),
This is a well written song. I really believe that the addition of electric guitar would lift this to another level. It`s a pop song in not unlike something the corrs would write. A second vocal would slso give this a commercial lift!
Well done
Paul
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@Wicked Deeds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19231)
Many thanks for the positive review, it is much appreciated.
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Well that was a lovely listen. I love the 80s style of production - something I indulge in myself from time to time. The voice is great - Kirsty MacColl came to mind, which is high praise in my book. I enjoyed the tasteful use of automated panning which added interest whilst listening on headphones. Very neat production, all sounded very well balanced and professional. The song itself is simple and catchy - a classic 80s pop song! Good stuff, I have no reservations at all :D
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Hi,
I'm getting Saint Etienne which is a very good thing indeed. This song is beautifully melodic and the vocals are just off the scale. I read the lyrics first and knew I was going to like it and I wasn't wrong. This is the best piece of melodic/lyrical/arrangement and performance I have heard on here in a very, very long time. Absolutely outstanding. Give me a CD's worth of this and I'd buy it.
M
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@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) @Bill Saunders (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18525)
Hi Guys, thanks to the both of you so much for your super positive reviews of The Dreamroad, so kind and so encouraging it really means a lot.
Also thanks again to all who have listened but not posted I hope it was an enjoyable listen.
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Definitely an 80s feel to it, really well produced, singer has a great voice and catchy chorus. However, it's not the style for me, it's a little samey, there is a slight relief in the middle which was good but I found myself looking for more light and shade.
Sorry @Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532), it's great work just not for me.
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Hi Grubstar ,
I’m trying to acquaint myself with everyone new and as you’ve just reviewed my song I thought I better check you out...and I’m glad I did...what a beaut
I‘m a huge synth pop fan and for me vince Clarke is God 😍
This is such a well written and produced song indeed 😍😍😍😍
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Yeah really nice slice of 80s pop and very interesting I got part way through and clocked the way the melody of verse lines stayed the same....something to think about I thought...then chorus lines did too and i thought wow it really works like this for this song...where i might want something different normally....THEN I read the comment above about it being samey and well funny how it hits us differently.
Anyway...worked for me!
Good song, great vocal. Lovely.
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@PeteS (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22588) Thanks for taking time out to review our song.
@Kafla (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=6905) Thanks for a great review, I'm a big fan of Vince Clarke myself.
@Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra Many thanks your review is much appreciated.
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Lovely song @Grubstar (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22532)
I’ll give it another listen.