The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Works in Progress => Topic started by: saxofooon on May 08, 2019, 02:43:17 PM
-
Hi! I'm new here! I just wrote my first song ever and really like to get some feedback on it. It is just lyrics for now.
(Verse 1)
Existing with closed eyes
Only lasting lies
Handcuffed reading his words
Ending in burns (in burns)
You’d never commit
I am about to lose it
Standing with my broken heart
I want to restart
(Chorus)
Is this your face
Or was it just a race
Did it mean a thing
That talk about a ring
trail of hurt
(Leaving me in the dirt)
Trail of hurt
(Verse 2)
Wasn’t it clearly
That sometimes you’d fear me
Only now I figured
That no one can fix it
Trust is broken
Words unspoken
Crying in the corner
I have lost all my armour
(Chorus)
Is this your face
Or was it just a race
Did it mean a thing
That talk about a ring
trail of hurt
(Leaving me in the dirt)
Trail of hurt
(Verse 3)
Saw you as a different someone
Never hurting a loved one
Talking about the future
But now my heart needs a sewer
Shaking hands pounding heart
Maybe we should break apart
(Chorus)
Is this your face
Or was it just a race
Did it mean a thing
That talk about a ring
trail of hurt
(Leaving me in the dirt)
Trail of hurt
(Bridge)
Naive thinking and a fake feeling
Now my heart can’t stop bleeding
Never thought this could happen again
But here I am (here I am)
(Chorus)
Is this your face
Or was it just a race
Did it mean a thing
That talk about a ring
trail of hurt
(Leaving me in the dirt)
Trail of hurt