The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Andyb on May 07, 2019, 03:05:20 PM
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It seems like a long time since I posted any new music but here you go, a demo for my new song "Death was a friend". I've experimented a bit with some production techniques and also some clean tones on my bass (once again this a completely bass generated affair). I had the music recorded and came up with the title and on googling it realised it was very close to a quote from the novel "The grapes of wrath" so I did a bit of research on the book (didn't have time to read it all!) and based my lyrics around it. I would welcome your comments. Calling it a demo for now as I will probably redo it for an EP release ;)
https://soundcloud.com/user-214476590/death-was-a-friend
lyrics
Death was a friend
[and sleep was his brother]
we are lost in time
but we can't climb out
victims of design
buried all around
in these empty words
can you find your truth
and with feet worn out
we find time to soothe
we are running scared
from death's outstretched arms
turn our blackened hearts
but he means no harm
I will scratch my eyes
'til my fingers bleed
then I'll stare him down
in a blood red scene
But you'll never save anyone
no you'll never save anyone
We raise voices for the missing ones
as we curse the unforgiving sun
dreams like paper as we watch them burn
we are one
we are one
You draw circles where we as we make our stand
I'll trade punches with a lesser man
make believe we held it in our hands
we are one
we are one
we will lay our heads
on this dust filled land
under empty skies
we make beds in sand
Bellies ache and squirm
with a hungry need
nerves that twist and turn
in his iron seat
But you'll never save everyone
no you'll never save everyone
We raise voices for the missing ones
as we curse the unforgiving sun
dreams like paper as we watch them burn
we are one
we are one
You draw circles where we as we make our stand
I'll trade punches with a lesser man
make believe we held it in our hands
we are one
we are one
But you'll never save anyone
no you'll never save anyone
We raise voices for the missing ones
as we curse the unforgiving sun
dreams like paper as we watch them burn
we are one
we are one
You draw circles where we as we make our stand
I'll trade punches with a lesser man
make believe we held it in our hands
we are one
we are one
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All I've got to say about this my friend is..fecking brilliant..loved it!! :) :) great guitar sound on the intro as well mate..awesome.
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Appreciated mate
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Hi Andy,
This is heavy and definitely dark.
Love those guitars, drums and I think the production is excellent, better than a demo.
A tune to get angry to.
Love the vocal effect,
Like the piano ending ,top tune.
Sandeep
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The quality around here at the minute is seriously awesome. This is another song I'll definitely be listening to again (and again). Happy to see your other songs are of similar quality and right up my street taste-wise. Sorry, I have nothing constructive to add; I was too busy just enjoying it to properly critique it :)
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Really appreciate the comments folks. I was a bit unsure about this song (but then I always am when I come to finishing songs). You're kind words have bolstered my belief in my songwriting which comes and goes. Many thanks
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Great vocal! Well sculpted track... interesting intro then - BANG! - loads of energy that doesn’t let up until the equally interesting outro. Very dramatic - can imagine it soundtracking something on Netflix. Snare drum maybe a bit relentless around the 4 minute mark? Apart from that detail, loved it.
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This is fabulous stuff Andy. Great laid back intro until we get into the heavy stuff. Brilliant guitar and vocals. Outro with the piano was clever as well as I can just picture the hoards at some large festival demanding an encore. Bravo man 8)
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Thanks so much guys. The vocals are actually my biggest gripe. I recorded them after two consecutive gigs with the cover band I play with and to me they sound a bit strained. I think I could do a better job with a well rested voice so will probably redo later
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Made my first lyric video for this track
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All sounds really great to me, super rock sound led by the bass as it should be! Your vocals are great, you don't need to be concerned about those.
Piano at the end is really effective. Like the whole thing very much :-)
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Hello,
It's a great piece ! I really like the sound of the intro. The guitars are very good and the voice too.
The end to the piano is perfect.
The whole sounds really professional!
IS
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Loved this one. Reminded me of a band that I can't for the life of me remember who (damn crap memory is haphazzard at best). It's on the tip of my tongue but won't quite talk to my brain... whatever, it's a good song!
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This is pretty brilliant
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Andy.
This is really good mate and right up our street.
Great driving feel, vocals top notch, although felt a little quiet in places but hey, as a track, Frickin cool vibe.
Listened a few times, has a very pro sound and feel, easily suitable for TV or media sync.
Well done Andy.
Thumbs up from sunny (Rainy) Plymouth this morn.
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Yo Andy.
That intro and the tension generated was inspired.
It's a fine rocker,well delivered.
Loved the vocals and the surprise ending. 8)
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Whato @Andyb (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20943) well delivered and carefully organised rock number, cut through on an iphone the bath...
I found the video a distraction from the song as i was wondering when something was going to happen.
Good job, i always find rock a very tricky genre to nail, production wise..I’ll get there one day.
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Great song for sure! :D
I have to say though, what overshadowed the song was the stellar production, for me. That drum mix is gorgeous, particularly that deep and punchy snare. Kudos to whoever tensioned the drums too.
Can't wait to hear more!
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Fab as always.. Just love your vocals as always, that accent really works for me :)!
Everything very well played and produced.. I'll be listening to this a fair few times I predict. Fab!
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Very good song very catchy melody , well produced great chorus
Well sung..well played overall quality tune mate👍
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Hi Andy,
This is quality.
Production is great - wished my finished tracks sounded as good as your "demos."
Pro sounding throughout for me.
Can't really say much more - other than I wouldn't be disappointed if it was on one of my fave artists albums.
Digger