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Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Movin Flavour on April 21, 2019, 12:10:02 AM
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This is the first song that Phil and I collaborated on in a year.
https://soundcloud.com/sandeep-issar/the-number-one-dream-house-mix
I told Phil that I had a half written Acid House Jazz song and about this competition, he thought he could fuse it with an element from his hero, Jean Michelle Jarre ..... and this is it.
We’ve been writing this song since September 2018, but thought of new ideas when Martin and Neil first mooted the Spring comp.
At one stage it was 8 minutes long, but we have cut it down to a really short 5:36 minutes!
The song is pretty abstract but it’s about the Dreams of people who have inspired me....and many others. In some cases they were locked up or paid the ultimate sacrifice for their beliefs; The Luther-Kings, Mandelas, Gandhis, Lincolns and Lennons of our past. The sparse lyrics are peppered with some of their key words or phrases.
It’s about dreams so we hope it’s exotic and we’ve included a Dream sequence to make it more so. Hope you enjoy and feed-back welcome....The lyrics are below:
Sandeep and Phil
The Number 1 Dream
Verse
Love is the number 1 dream
Love is the number 1 dream
Visions inside my head
Baby I'm seeing red
D'you ever see what I dream
Visions of deja vu
D'ya ever see it too
Dyou ever see what I dream
Dah Nah Dah
Dah Nah Dah
Dah Nah Dah
Dah Nah Dah
Chorus
I see you Dream
I hear the screams
Taking on the number 1 dream
You wanna fight
For what is right
Taking on the number 1 Dream
An eye for eye
The world goes blind
Taking on the number 1 dream
You're Tremendous
Don't walk alone
Taking on the number 1 dream
Verse
Love is the number 1 dream
Love is the number 1 dream
Visions inside my head
Baby I'm seeing red
D'you ever see what I dream
Visions of deja vu
D'ya ever see it too
Dyou ever dream what I dream
Dah Nah Dah
Dah Nah Dah
Dah Nah Dah
Dah Nah Dah
Chorus
I see you Dream
I hear the screams
Taking on the number 1 dream
You wanna fight
For what is right
Taking on the number 1 Dream
An eye for eye
The world goes blind
Taking on the number 1 dream
You're Tremendous
Don't walk alone
Taking on the the number 1 dream
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Hi Sandeep, I have got the house to myself this morning and this sounds great really loud! Very hypnotic and bouncy!
Good idea for that number one dream, which you didn't need to overkill, so the sparse lyrics really work.
Cool vocals, well mixed. Yeah I liked it! ;D
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Hi Sandeep and Phil. Great to hear a new one from you guys on the forum. I had a little listen earlier but wanted to experience the full volume experience. I'm getting the JMJ vibe big time. I love the sentiments. Excellent production and it goes off in so many unexpected ways. A spacey trip of a song
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Great to hear something new from you! You never post enough of your own material. I really like this - the beats are great and the sparse vocals convey a simple yet effective message. I love all the attention to detail as well - there are great textures and changes spread throughout the song...I remember a few banging house parties in Coventry this would have gone down well at. Great.
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Whoa.. very slick.. Confidently delivered, Sir! Love the concept and theme. It's all very clever and works very well I must say.. The whole song is very well produced the vocals sit in the mix very well (that's you right Sandeep??).
Great song @Movin Flavour (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20528) !!
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Got that great bounce Sandeep (and Phil!) with that well put together backing track....wouldn't know where to start myself with anything like this!
The structure of the arrangement is good. Breakdown comes just at the right place to keep the interest going and builds to a good rising finish which works very nicely! .
All sounds very professionally done and makes all the right noises in the right places...love some of the sounds you're coming up with here.
Different to most of the other stuff on here and good for that....gives us a nice bit of variety doesn't it?
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Really works well for me, beats are solid and the trippy synths fit the dreamy nature of the lyrics.
Builds really nicely when it needs too. Great stuff :)
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Yes as has been said great dancey beach-house vibe - just wins you over. I liked the sentiment of the lyrics too but I’d change the ‘seeing red’ line, that means getting angry doesn’t it? Felt a bit at odds with the positivity of the rest of it. Vocals are very good though, natural and not over played. Certainly a shot in the arms of good vibes this one.
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Hi Sandeep @Movin Flavour (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20528) - Listening as I write, Dig that '80's bass, sounds like a DX7...not keen on the da na da, pumps along nicely, catching the Jarre vibe, and the Acid House, most interesting combo, nice to see that you give plenty of instrumental space for those who will dance to it, to get in the groove, @2:52 lovely BVox, 8mins wouldn't be out of place for a club song like this, getting the No.1 dream lyric/melody hook, and the establishment of the synth hook at 4:45, really, really kickn' just don't want this one to stop, maybe put out the 8min as a dance remix....
Brilliant.
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Love the cool hypnotics vibe going on in this track 8) the sparsity of the lyrics really lends itself to the spacey backing track 8)
I could definitely get into dancing to this and I really like the concept :) sounds awesome on headphones
Fabylous collab and entry Sandeep and Phil :)
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Thanks All for your feedback:
@MichaelA (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21274) - Glad you played it Loud
@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) - John thanks for your comments, I'm not sure about JMJ??...even looked it up, but am glad its a vibe.
@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820) - Thx Karen, Phil spent agents on the vocals, wouldn't need so much time with your voice!
@MartynRich (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20533) - Thank you, Coventry House Party Sound Great
@Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra - Thx for all your kind words, I have to admit that Phil, as always, spends so much time on the production, and also added loads of sections to the song. All the polishing and refinery was down to him.
@tboswell (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20223) -Thanks for all your kind comments
@PaulyX (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21034) - Great feedback - the seeing Red was meant to refer to all the unnecessarily spilt blood... maybe we will change the lyrics, but was also trying to make it a bit Dancey too.
@cowparsleyman (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21308) - Thx for your feedback - maybe you can do a "Cowparsleyman" 8 minute remix???
Thanks @crystalsuzy (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18947) - I hope you do dance to it ... even with the headphones on!!
Sandeep/ Phil
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Jean Michelle Jarre :)
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@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) --- ;D ;D ;D haha , i was looking for something from the House Music Scene!!
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I like it so much and yes, it definitely sounds exotic (especially vocals). Calm synth parts are great and also their gradation, which sounds epic in some moments. Well done :)
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Yo Sandeep.
Love the 80s vibe going' on here.
The track hides it's 5+ minutes very well and never drags. A fine groove keep the interest going right to the end.
Good work guys. :)
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Hi Davy @Skub (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20061) thanks fro your comment, glad you thought it wasn't too long.
Hi @Jibbek (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22379) , thanks for thinking its exotic.
All the best
Sandeep
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Really enjoyed this one...it has a trippy hypnotic quality to it and the vocal is great that "you're tremendous" line stuck out in particular...sounded super. ! Reminded me of someone famous but despite wracking my brain and having had several listens... I don't know who!
Excellent!