The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: MartynRich on February 21, 2019, 09:01:22 PM
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Minimalism eat your heart out.
This is as stripped down and as raw as I can get - hope you like it. Lyrics at the link.
https://soundcloud.com/martynrich/crossfire
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Nothing wrong with stripped down and raw Martyn and it's a great reminder to think beyond the production bubble and think about the song. I thought this is such a clever piece of music, emotional and poignant. A slap around the face to all those "modern" singer songwriters who have such feckin affected voices that I am genuinely amazed that people like that shit. I love your music Martyn. You keep it REAL :)
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Yo Martyn.
This is very affecting. A convincing cry from deep down.
I remember the first time I heard NINs and their song Hurt,it blew me away. This has that same desolate,heartbroken feel.
I'm in love with the melancholy,the reflective and this has it all in spades. 8)
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@MartynRich (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20533) - Getting a bit busy here,maybe lose the Vox and the gtr 8)...Got it absolutely bang on, the Lyrics are the main thing here, and too much going on in the background always detracts from the message, so yeah, cool song.
Maybe a 2nd Voice in the Chorus would add something different to the listener.
Daniel Baremboim once said music is all about space, the music has to breathe, and this does.
Nice work.
Rich
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Hi Martin,
Lovely emotional feel to this, Played well and vocals convey great emotion. Especially like the subtle elec GTR in the background.
Massive thumbs up here dude,
Andy
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Really good man really cool 8) but sing the lyric words with chords man
Love it but i dont want too if you know what i mean 8)
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That second guitar drifting in and out of the main rhythmic arpeggios is very clever and subtle, just adds enough interest without spoiling the stripped back feel.
Nice passionate edge to those vocals, selling the emotion. Yeah, as mentioned above a dual vocal at the end would not go amiss.
Decent image on your SC for the song too!
Really like this, cheers!
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For me, this is real music. One guitar (or instrument) and one voice with very little else.
Not that I don't love lush arrangements and production values. . . but if a song REQUIRES those things, then it's not a good enough song. If it can't be effectivelly played and sung just like this, the song itself is (imo) lacking.
Too often lush arrangements and production values substitute for excellence in songwriting. This was wonderfully written and wonderfully performed. It did not need anything more.
Maybe it could have used a little more, but clearly did not NEED more. Very impressive to my ears.
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this is a special track
i wouldnt do anything to it
vocals alive and the guitar and back drop so visual
fills the room
beautiful aching song
may it take you somewhere martyn
brilliant
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Hey Martyn, welcome back ;D ;D
Mighty fine song ;D beautiful music, that set's up your vox really well.
Amazing vocals, beautiful delivery and performance. Just love it my friend ;D
A real song ;D ;D ;D
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What a great song!
Loved the stripped-down thing...lyrics are excellent and it's very cleverly done. Voice sounds great too.
One of the best that I've heard for a while on here.
Off for another listen now :)
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Thank you all for your amazing comments so far, I feel very humbled as this an extremely personal song. I am sat with hands firmly under my backside so as not to tamper with it anymore. ;D
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Yoooooo....welcome back fella!!
It's great to hear something new from you Martyn. This is a really lovely and engaging song. You sound fab on it! I don't have much more to say than that mate.
Great stuff and keep em coming!! 😁🎶👊🏻🎶
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Good song indeed, with some poetry in the lyrics that provoke some thought and don't reveal all on the surface, which I like.
I might have tried a bit less reverb on the vocal and maybe put some on the master bus to try to keep the voice and instruments in a similar sounding space (but that may be missing the point...)
Great stuff
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i dig it.
i connect with the minimalism. it is my preference normally, in music, and most things.
chronicity - i ponder what you are going for with this. unsure.
at a few places, particularly in chorus, the vocal seemed to really jump out volume wise, maybe a bit too much.
there were a couple of pitchy spots vocally. you may be completely aware and ok with them. i generally don't mind things getting a bit pitchy. i'm sure a few listens and i would be completely familiar with them in this performance, and accepting of it.
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@adamfarr (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20124) - thank you!
@mikek (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20884) - chronicity means being stuck with a long-term condition you can't escape from. I'm aware of the pitchy vocals but couldn't really give one ;D I continue to work on my voice in any case.
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chronicity means being stuck with a long-term condition you can't escape from. I'm aware of the pitchy vocals but couldn't really give one ;D I continue to work on my voice in any case.
yeah i'm aware of the Webster's meaning... i was just fighting with its context in the lyric. not a bad thing, just a head scratcher for me.
and the pitchiness is not really an issue with me, just mentioning it. i find i need reminders of my own pitch uh-ohs as when i listen to my performances over and over, i become used to how they sound, anticipating and expecting, and appreciating the flaws...but i sometimes appreciate others calling things out. keeps me honest.
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Very good song.
I really enjoyed the listen.
And the stripped down approach doesn't leave you wanting.
Very difficult for anyone to find fault.
Well done.
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HI, I really like the electric that weaves subtly in and out of the acoustic picking (especially around the 2:30-2:40 point), and the lovely suspended chord at the finish. It sounds 'gothic' to me, I could imagine The Mission or a band like that playing this in a reflective moment during their set.
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Beautiful.
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Great song Martyn. I like the rawness of it. Makes it more real and heartfelt. You can tell if a song is really good if it sounds good with just vocals and guitar. It's inspiring to hear it done well. Maybe one day.....
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Wow, this is really beautiful @MartynRich (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20533) :) Love the simplicity and space. Your voice sounds amazing and the lyrics are pure poetry. :-*
Love the angst of this song and you sing it so well....sounds like it's coming from deep within. Lovely guitars as well. This is a winner MR :-*
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All great comments, thank you. One of my favs...I’ll just have to start gigging soon
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I love the lyrics @MartynRich (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20533). Clever and engaging and emotional, delivered perfectly. . And I too really like the stripped down treatment. It suits the song and the theme I think. Very very enjoyable listen.
K
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Listened. No nits. This seems different from your past work. Though, admittedly I don't listen much these days (trying to work on that, as I think it may be best not to wait for life to settle down).
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Hi,
Simplicity is great when the song can take it and this can. Very effective song sung with real passion. I like that it's meaning is oblique (to me) - I don't want everything on a plate on the first listen. Superb piece of work.
M