The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Yodasdad on January 13, 2019, 02:51:16 PM
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Hi All
I've been listening to quite a bit of acoustic, live and unplugged stuff recently and this song has been largely inspired by that I think.
https://soundcloud.com/my-idiom/walk-in-to-the-fire-m-blair-2019
I didn't consciously set out to mimic a live recording (largely as I wouldn't really know how and because all the instruments are midi or sampled, which I expect would make it harder still) but towards the end, that was the way I was leaning. So that was sort of the intention that coloured my decisions late on, although it is just what it is really.
I'd love any feedback on any aspect of this.
Thank you in advance.
Yodasdad
Walk In To The Fire © M Blair
V1
How did we end up this way
Intimate strangers just sharing days
Our words destroy our memories
Like daggers we use them anyway
Can we pull out of the darkness
Have we used up all our chances
On this hopeless masquerade
C
I will walk in to the fire
Turn my back towards the light
Lay down my dreams to face our demons
I would let go of it all
Take a knee to break your fall
But I can’t fix a thing that’s broken
If you don’t believe in me
V2
Tell me what you really feel
When you look at me these days
Lets not waste another year
Shall we go our separate ways
I meant it when I pledged my life
But there’s a light out in your eyes
There’s only so much we can fake
The final thing I’d ever do
Is consider giving up on you
But my mind’s about to break
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Big, bold and confident strumming and singing.
I wasn't sure if this was the right treatment for this particular song...I could hear the strings and everything straining to be let off the leash, somehow! If all the guys are there...they may as well get stuck in unless they're on a work-to-rule or overtime ban or some other 70's throwback that probably makes no sense to a young fella like yourself.
Very nice song though...vocals are bang on the money as always. Nice clean guitar tone too. I think maybe (unless I was just imagining it) it's a bit tricky doing your own backing vocals in a "live" situation (even though it's simulated) but there isn't an easy way around that!
Nicely done anyway...
ps when you say all the instruments are midi or sampled...do you mean "ALL the instruments"?
If so, I'd never have known and you are a genius.
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@Yodasdad (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19208)
That’s a huge acoustic guitar sound. Interesting piano which, is quite unexpected as it soars and dives in a really interesting manner. This doesn’t really get started for me until the ’I will walk into the fire’ section which is lovely. When the bass is introduced, it has such a big impact. Perhaps allow the song to develop further before introducing the guitar solo. Overall, I felt like the song length could have been extended. I really enjoyed listening but I’d like to hear the verse sections matching the calibre of the chorus. Lots of space here which is great and I can hear how you could develop this song further to present something quite epic!
Paul
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Yo Mr.B.
Now and again I come across a song which makes me wonder why the writer/performer isn't well known. Such is the level of composition and execution,it unlines just how many talented folk get overlooked. Fair is never what life has been,so I wonder and move on.
For those of us who are content just to appreciate music with no hope or agenda,this is as good as it gets. This right here.
It's lovely,man. 8)
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Lovely acoustic sound Yoda and exceptional vocals as well. I'm confused now as you say it's all samples. If so you are a top sample chopper extraordinaire. I kinda thought that was going to explode towards the end into a rock infused maelstrom. It didn't matter that it didn't as it's a top song :)
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Wow! Anthemic and emotional. I loved this from the first chords ringing out - that acoustic sound you've captured is really really great. Fantastic vocal and I love the theme and the lyrics.
This is simply a great song. You've done a super job with it too.. Just love it!
K
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Thanks for the comments so far guys, I shall respond fully in due course, but just to jump in on what @PaulAds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20253) and @pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) are saying:
I probably didn't explain myself very well...
The only instrument I play is the piano/keyboards, plus a bit of basic drumming, but I got no drums.
The piano in my songs I obviously play, but don't record the audio, just the midi to trigger a sampled piano that sounds better than mine. In this case it was one of Native Instruments offerings, The Grandeur I think.
Drums- I either play them on midi keyboard and then tweak them in the editor or more often get a basic beat from the Logic Drummer feature and then tweak that.
Guitar, how I wish I'd learned to play guitar - if you were to go back and listen to some of my very early songs (please don't), you would notice that there's either no guitar or just single note snippets, played on the keyboard.
After much searching I came across some packages that allow you to play the chord sequence on the keyboard, which will then trigger the same chords being played by a guitarist playing them, that was recorde/sampled. (I think). I can then go in and tweak them to a certain extent, and of course as you said, chop them up.
The bass in this is a standard Logic patch. I think it's synthesised rather than sampled, but I'm not entirely sure.
The strings are again played on keyboard, using a combination in this case of a logic violin sample and native instruments session strings.
I then spend hours and hours and days and hours (ask my wife) tweaking, editing, mixing, eq'ing, automating....to try to get it all to fit together and sound somewhere close to authentic.
With this song I'd say it took about 20% of the time to write the song and the other 80% to do all of the above.
So that's kind of my process, not sure if I'm technically write when I said it's all midi and samples, but that's how I perceive it.
Oh and the singing of course, I have not sampled myself...yet....so I do actually do that.
Yodasdad
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Oh, the guitar solo in this is played in on midi keyboard too, using sounds from I think...Evolution Strawberry.
Yodasdad
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Amazing insight mate. I'm a (shit) guitarist who wishes that I could play the piano so well done. Midi has changed the recording world big time
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Wow it's exactly my thing. I love this kind of stuff. Only the first 30 seconds are a bit rugged and the voice was not exactly on the music but this is may only me.
I'm 100 percent satisfied listening to this gem.
Alexander
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Man!!! What a song!! I LOOOVE it!! Great melody, lyrics and production. Only thing I didn't like was the clapping...just didn't think you needed it...I get that it's a quirky, fun thing to do, but for me just didn't feel right.
However that being said...if you'd come up with a way to have a crowd sing that epic chorus with you in the mix, that would have been pretty cool!😁👍🏻
Excellent work man! Fave song I've heard on here in a while.
😁🎶👊🏻🎶
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Deep heart felt lyrics & powerfully delivered vocals
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Nice one....really nice. The chorus kicks butt
V1 line 2 consider dropping 'just'
V1 line 3 consider dropping both 'our'
V1 line 4...are you saying use them or throw them? I like throw
V2 line 3...'lets not' is tricky...i would look for something else...simplify it...dont waste as an example
V2 line 7 consider deopping 'theres'
I'm not a fan of the guitar tone for the solo, but the solo notation is quite tasteful
I'm not a great guitarist but anytime you want to give me a shot at an accompanying track on one of your songs I woukd be glad to try.
This is really a great song.
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Yeah, those guitars have something really epic about them, really drew me in.
I think a bigger climactic chorus somewhere could be good, though (the instruments are already there). Repeating the title line again within the chorus could also be effective I think.
The first verse with the daggers was the highlight of the lyrics, very nice.
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Very professional sounding, LOVE the big acoustic guitar sound. Decent vocals and I also love how the song builds and builds. This is how it should be done, amazing.
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An epic acoustic rock ballad for sure, the scope of it reminded me of something Oasis might have done, but I'm not suggesting you sound like them. It is just that these epic acoustic numbers are very hard to pull off, and they could do it, but many writers end up producing something cliched and plodding. This, on the other hand, is fresh and inventive.
I really liked it, although like Leo above, I thought the stadium clapping a little odd. That said, I think I will put it on all of my songs now! ;D
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Mike,
Powerful intro with guitar, sounding great and vocals soaring too.
Neat piano and it builds into a proper power ballad.
Good work
:)
neil
I get the - 'I then spend hours and hours and days and hours (ask my wife) tweaking, editing, mixing, eq'ing, automating....to try to get it all to fit together and sound somewhere close to authentic.' although not sure I have the patience..
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Occasionally a relatively stripped-back song manages to be ENORMOUS and this is one of those.
Great stuff, I liked the way you left off some of the obvious things you could have done (like big drums) because it doesn't need them.
All thumbs up here.
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This is sooooo good. Great vocals and that acoustic really sets the mode. Very nice build up as it progress and some interesting rhythmical stuff in the first chorus. Loe when the kick comes in. Mix sounds great, full and crispy at the same time. The guitar solo is perhaps a tad to upfront, at least the first note hit my ears a bit.
This is a good song but add to that a really,really good arrangement/production and you have a killer of a song.
I'm not worthy! ;D
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Guitar sound amazing on this record, vocal spot on for the song.
Great work sir!.
Best Regards,
Slava B.
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Hi,
This is a very strong piece of work indeed. It has that epic, sweeping quality which is very hard to achieve with a relatively simple instrumentation. Excellent singing throughout and I believed every word.
SOTM material.
M
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I like this acoustic style.
It's raw and polished....so much energy.
Love the lyrics
Great guitars and love the strings around 2.15.
Your singing gets better each time I hear it, live the harmony bits too.
Top track
Sandeep
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Hi Yodasdad,
And that's how you make an amazing epic acoustic ballad.
The end & good night. Seriously amazing man. You sure you don't play guitar?
The heavy strumming really sets the intense mood then the piano comes in bringing light to the shade, followed by the heart beat sounding drums building up the tension again. Not sure if it's just me but the slightly flat sounding guitar solo was a great choice in sound. Just a personal preference but I would have liked to hear the piano a bit more during the guitar solo. Maybe a bit of quick chord chiming on the piano to maintain the tension whilst the guitar chills.
Law
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My apologies to all who took the time to comment on this that it has taken me so long to respond. I've been trying to find the time to sit down and do this for a while.
@PaulAds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20253)
Thanks - Yes I guess doing my own BV's live would be quite tricky now you come to mention it. I must admit that I am just about too young to remember the 70's but as I now work for a trade union, I'm rather familiar with working to rule and overtime ban's.
@Wicked Deeds (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19231)
Thanks for your observations, I take on board what you're saying about the verses and overall length.
@Skub (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20061)
Thanks for your kind words - Maybe if I had a face like Justin Beiber I could get somewhere. Then again I'd have no time to write songs then as I'd spend all day punching myself around the head.
@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269)
Thanks for listening - I'll save the explosion as an add lib on my world tour.
@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820)
Thanks a lot, I know from your stuff you have taste so I shall definitely appreciate these compliments.
@fischermans (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19014)
Thanks for your honest observations, appreciated.
@LostBoy (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20481)
Thanks for this, appreciate the comments. I know what you mean about the crowd noise. To be honest, it sounded a lot better and more authentic before soundcloud did it's compression magic on it.
@The Portrait Piano (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20602)
Thanks for taking the time to listen and comment.
@mikek (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20884)
Thanks for the lyrical pointers and the offer of guitar, I may well take ou up on that at some point.
@adamfarr (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20124)
Thanks for listening, if I ever to a remix/record of this I'll certainly take on board those suggestions.
@RealKevM (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21324)
Cheers, thanks for commenting and complimenting.
@MichaelA (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21274)
Thanks- although i wouldn't have made the connection to Oasis, I did used to listen to them a fair bit back in the day so I guess something may have rubbed off somewhere.
@Neil C (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18856)
Thanks man - I don't always have the patience either, usually after one or two songs I have to take a bit of a break for a while.
@PaulyX (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21034)
Thanks - I'll the the description of ENORMOUS.
@Jambrains (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19875)
You're deffo worthy mate, thanks. Take on board what you say about the solo, good to have second pair of ears.
@SlavaB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19895)
Thanks for your tme and the comment.
@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653)
And yet something you do so well yourself... Thank's for the SOTM mention, I think you subliminally influenced @MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820)!
@Movin Flavour (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20528)
Thanks Sandeep, I thinks theres something about acoustic tracks that's hard to beat sometimes.
@The Portrait Piano (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20602)
Ah, you commented twice...well double thanks. Like your thoughts about the piano in the solo.
Again, apologies all for not commenting sooner...I did read all of your words as you posted them and they mean a lot.
Yodasdad
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Yo Yodasdad.
This is a really nice song, its got a real arcade fire or thirteen sense (Into the fire) vibe. and I love that.
Vocals are great,
For me, I was waiting for it all to come in at the end, but that just my style.
Really nice track, sounds great.
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WOW< @Yodasdad (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19208) :o What an amazing experiences that was :o I have to agree, and can't really add anything more, to whats already been said about his track :o It's an epic acoustic rock ballad, which isn't easy to pull off, so good on you. 8)
If this was inspired by listening to other acoustic songs, what would you create after listening to an epic electric rock track? :o
Love the lyrics and your vocals are fantastic! Amazing what you can create with just midi/samples and vocals :o This should be on the radio :-*
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Hi Yoda!
I love this song. I was going to comment on how the chord progression evolves in such a strong way, then read how you did it on the piano. It makes a lot of sense - it provides a slightly different perspective on putting music together and the result has turned out to be really inventive and powerful.
The chord progression evolves so much I'd love to hear some backing vocals on that chorus, but apart from that I've no complaints at all. Oh wait, yes I do, the next time you need a guitar solo get one of us to do it ;D It sounds top notch, it's just the principle of the matter ;D ;D ;D ;D
Well done on a great piece of work.