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Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: cowparsleyman on September 16, 2018, 05:53:18 PM

Title: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 16, 2018, 05:53:18 PM
Whato, This song is an '80's esque pop song I wrote a few years ago, with no Vocals, so I thought I'd go ahead a finish it, with a few layers of male Vox.


Hope you like it, all comments/ideas are very welcome.

btw, I didn't want any meaning to this song, no fancy story, not happy/sad tales, just a disposible pop song (as most are...) with nice sounding, rhythmic lines.

cpm
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: pompeyjazz on September 17, 2018, 07:00:50 PM
Great 80s feel @cowparsleyman (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21308) .Touches of Dead and Alive. Interesting synth parts made this a very enjoyable listen
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: redrhodie on September 17, 2018, 07:19:51 PM
I liked this one. I listened to it the other day but got too busy to comment. Fun summery vibe reminds me of hanging out with my friends on my front porch, watching the boys play wiffle ball, listening to music not as good as this too loud, which drove my mother crazy. Haha. I see nothing to criticize. It's just right.
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: mickyplankton on September 18, 2018, 08:26:01 AM
I like this too. I don't think it's disposable at all. There's quite a lot of texture to this song. I really like the light touches on this. Not sure what instrument you use but that little melody that keeps surfacing on top is sublime. You hear it best around 2.12. What instrument is that?

Cheer Micky
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 18, 2018, 08:44:33 AM
Whato all...

Thanks very much for taking the time to give my song a listen.

@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) - Glad you like it, now Dead or Alive, that's a choice...was that the band with a guy with an eye patch and huge hair?

@redrhodie (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21171) - You always paint such a vivid picture in your reviews, I can just imagine you on the porch watching the boys, (what on earth is wiffle ball? to me it sounds either like a painful condition that needs urgent surgery or a cross between morris dancing and American football). As to the loud volume, now isn't there a level that makes your foot or index finger tap, then theres the level that pulls even the most non dancing preppy out of that chair and makes you wanna DANCE, and then there's the level that makes you go somewhere else in your brain....LOVELY.

@mickyplankton (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20769) - You're right there are quite a lot a layers in this, (the instrumental tune was recorded years ago so I can't remember the detail, but there are about 40 vox tracks) the instrument @ 2:12 is a horn section, phased and bent using the pitch bend wheel on a Korg N5ex synth. Micky - with regard to the little light touches, you are very perceptive, often I approach music as mental gardening, filling a hole here, making space there, putting colour here, making an aural landscape, that at least keeps me interested, and hopefully others too.

Take a listen to any Erasure song and then try and unpick what is going on, it's really very complex, but sounds very very simple 'Am I right' for example...

Thanks again folk.

cpm



Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: MichaelA on September 18, 2018, 12:42:14 PM
Nice vibe easy to listen to. Lots of subtle pieces of instrumentation popping in and out and likeable, layered vocals too. A good piece of writing and performance. Because it just grooves along so easily, maybe I'd just possibly consider adding a bit of something that kind of jumps out and surprises a bit more, maybe for example after the main chorus hook as there's quite a gap between the chorus end and the subsequent verse. But if you are just after keeping it more mellow and easy on the ear, well you have done a fine job.


Remembering back to the 80's. yeah I could well imagine myself happily dancing along to this - or humming along happily in the car! Liked it even more on second listen - so it's probably a grower - always a good sign!
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 18, 2018, 01:03:53 PM
@MichaelA (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21274) - Lovely comments, thanks, really appreciate the listen, it's funny Michael but I spent last Sunday pm, doing exactly that, trying to fill that hole, I tried all sorts of synthy hooks, one of which sounded pretty good, but it wasn't perfect, so inevitably it remains on the cutting room floor, when I listened again at the hole-y version, the part that was there seemed to stand out more.

The main difficulty with this song is that I don't have the individual instrumental tracks anymore, just a complete wav, so any editing work on the instrument side is not possible, the other difficulty (which is not a show stopper, but more like too much hard work) is the fact that there is no MIDI heartbeat to sync any further instrumentation to, that fill for example.

To be really honest Michael... I think the Vox could have sounded better if @jacksimmons (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18881) would have done them, it just doesn't suit my voice, (I came very close to asking Andy Bell to see if he would be up for it, you never know if you don't ask, but even if he was up for it, his management and record company wouldn't, shame really.) , also I'm not 100% convinced by the mix of the vocals in the Verse, which one is the lead?

I also think the structure isn't quite right, there should be a middle 8 type of instrumental part that moves away from what you know, which allows the theme to return, but as I said the original wav is set in digital concrete, so hey ho...

Dance away, let me know if it is a grower... :)

Thanks again

Rich
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: MichaelA on September 18, 2018, 01:13:38 PM
I thought your vocals were fine for this @cowparsleyman (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21308). But yeah, someone like @Jack Simmons (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18691) would be cool to add high male harmonies, as he is so good at that - I should know as I saw him live a few weeks back and him and his band were terrific! But yours don't need replacing, honest!  ;D

Yeah I get the difficulty if you've lost the stems. Sometimes when I get a bit of a block on a song part I just forget it for a week or so - then it usually seems much easier to solve after a break from it -  and then I'm like 'Why didn't I think of that in the first place?!'  ;D
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 18, 2018, 01:27:05 PM
@MichaelA (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21274) - Thanks, I find it works both ways, sometimes, I lose the thread if I move away from a song, I find listening in the car works wonders for ideas...and then, like you say, I get great inspiration by leaving it a while, I have to also say,, that this forum is so important, for others really listen and give honest opinions, which I really value, many times I've acted on the advice offered here. @Boydie (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18510) - Thanks for your efforts in keeping this going.

Rich
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: Morefrog Jones on September 18, 2018, 05:55:21 PM
yes - i like this a lot - some good melodies going on and a very catchy and easy to grab on to chorus...It does have an 80's feel but I think it still has a current vibe to it as well...Some Good stuff going on ..its a thumbs up from me.
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: Neil C on September 18, 2018, 06:55:32 PM
cpm,
Well you got that vibe off fine. I can hear the various 80's bits and pieces. Thompson twins, Blancmange and Depeche mode.
I like the creative tension between the straight synths and the slightly swinged drums.
Tune is poppy and like the layered vocals too
 :)
neil
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 18, 2018, 07:53:05 PM
Whato, thanks for the listen

@Morefrog Jones (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20200) - Thanks very much for the feedback, good to know...it's so hard to produce a tune that one remembers, for good reasons, but as someone commented earlier, maybe it's a grower...

@Neil C (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18856) - Thanks for your comments, really appreciate that you like the layered Vox, not perfect but I guess OK...ish. as I can remember the dotted 6/8 drums were an afterthought...

A compliment indeed to be compared with those bands, I always loved the guitar sound and production of The Twins.

Vince Clarke (Erasure Keys and co songwriter) is one of my heroes, he knows about Pop music (btw. Yazoo used to practise at the same rehearsal studios that we used , and they'd always seem to block our van in with their Mustang, We'd have to ask em to move it.  :)

Thanks again

Rich





Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: CaliaMoko on September 18, 2018, 08:12:10 PM
This kinda reminded me of the Beach Boys. Nice and mellow with lots rich harmonies and cool sounds. I like it a lot. It would have been nice to have the lyric in the post, but I could hear most of the words pretty well. No nits from me.
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 19, 2018, 08:35:19 AM
This kinda reminded me of the Beach Boys. Nice and mellow with lots rich harmonies and cool sounds. I like it a lot. It would have been nice to have the lyric in the post, but I could hear most of the words pretty well. No nits from me.

Hi @CaliaMoko (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19928), thanks for your review, Beach Boys, wow, that's a compliment...

Apologies for omitting the Lyrics...here they are.

Is it you
Is it me
Is that the way it's got to be.

Is it me
is it you
Is it the love between us two

All I want is a new romance
All I need is a second chance
It was just one night in France
Come on baby, lets sing 'Lets Dance'

Looking for something on my radio
Looking for some thing lets go lets go

Gotta go
Gotta go
Gotta go

She gave me something you could never do
She gave me love and a piece of you
Are you listening to what I say
Come on baby lets dance away

Looking for something on my radio
Looking for some thing lets go lets go

etc...
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: tboswell on September 19, 2018, 12:08:40 PM
Used to hate this 80s synth style of pop but nostalgia has worked some magic and quite enjoy this stuff now.
Nicely realised, with loads of those tinny synths and brass noises that defined the era.
Catch, fluffy and really enjoyable.
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 19, 2018, 01:31:08 PM
Used to hate this 80s synth style of pop but nostalgia has worked some magic and quite enjoy this stuff now.
Nicely realised, with loads of those tinny synths and brass noises that defined the era.
Catch, fluffy and really enjoyable.

Goodness @tboswell (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20223) - fancy that, a convert, what was your bag? punk, Heavy Metal, Indy? Anyway thanks for the feedback, glad you liked it. (funny I was a total jazz rock/funk fan ages ago, but now I really love the songs on here, so much diversity and real talent, and just love the collabs that come on by...I just listened to Macca's new album and it really doesn't bring anything new to my ears, but new fresh stuff is always around here, from @pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) 's Oranges to @RealKevM (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21324) - Too Late, Oh yes and that wonderful Underfelt by @Neil C (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18856)  some time ago. But I guess Macca's on a hiding to nothing whatever he does...

'Catchy, fluffy and really enjoyable'  was exactly how I wanted it to be received, thanks

cpm

Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: RealKevM on September 19, 2018, 06:46:28 PM
Cheers for bigging my tune up mate :)
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: MonnoDB on September 22, 2018, 08:23:22 PM
Love a bit of 80s synth... this is spot on for the genre @cowparsleyman (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21308) ... catchy as hell.. For some reason I loved the "just one night in France" line.. Not sure why - imagery I guess even without defining..

Really enjoyed it!

Karen
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on September 23, 2018, 11:02:23 AM
@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820) - Thanks for the listen Karen, greatly appreciated, glad you liked it, the night in france, well i have to be honest, I was running out of -ance rhymes or near rhymes that would make sense....

Got kind of away with it though.... :)

Regards

Rich
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: montydog on September 25, 2018, 04:15:05 PM
Hi,

This catches the 80's synth vibe very well. I was 18 in 1980 so this sort of thing was playing in the clubs and on the radio all the time when I was living it large. I hated it then but now it's softened by the warm glow of nostalgia. Effective and very nicely realised.

M
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on October 02, 2018, 12:36:04 PM
Hi,

This catches the 80's synth vibe very well. I was 18 in 1980 so this sort of thing was playing in the clubs and on the radio all the time when I was living it large. I hated it then but now it's softened by the warm glow of nostalgia. Effective and very nicely realised.

M

@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) - Hi Monty, thanks for the listen and the feedback, that's the thing about nostalgia, one takes the things that were awful and in abundance, and then when they are rare as hell, they are held in high esteem, like Arp 2600's I saw Stevie Wonder curse like hell about those things, forever failing and switching off, but they were very much his sound. It goes to show how bad Austin Allegros were, nobody remembers those with any smidgen of fondness..

Glad you liked my '80's offering,

Rich
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: Skub on October 02, 2018, 07:56:56 PM
Yo CPM.

Ah man,I love that bubbling synth.

Although,being a guitar freak,I was supposed to loathe the keyboard driven 80s,there were loads I really liked. Eurythmics,Howard Jones,Yazoo,etc.

Your snapshot of the era encapsulates the feel and the vibe,as well as being a cute little pop song regardless of decade definition.

Very cool.  8)
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on October 02, 2018, 08:06:45 PM
Yo CPM.

Ah man,I love that bubbling synth.

Although,being a guitar freak,I was supposed to loathe the keyboard driven 80s,there were loads I really liked. Eurythmics,Howard Jones,Yazoo,etc.

Your snapshot of the era encapsulates the feel and the vibe,as well as being a cute little pop song regardless of decade definition.

Very cool.  8)

Whato @Skub (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20061) , very kind of you to take a listen, and praise indeed from you, glad you like it, means a lot to me, also being a guitar freak...

I sense there is an closet '80 following here in the forum, folk like you and @montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653), also @Jack Simmons (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18691) he's a young pup, but does a great '80's vibe. So might fire up the Jup or the SEM (never liked the dx7)  and try another...must take these shoulder pads now.

Cheers

cpm
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: Mutrins on October 02, 2018, 11:45:38 PM
Cool 80s vibe for sure!

kind of a Depeche Mode feel to it. kept thinking of Enjoy The Silence.

Great job!
Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: Binladeda on October 03, 2018, 06:29:18 AM

 Lovin this Rich ;D ;D  Great groove and melodies. Modern sounding production, but it has
 a 70's Beach Boys feel going on there....somewhere ;D ;D
 Beautiful vocal.  Everything fits like a glove ;D ;D

 Great work my friend...
 (be contacting you soon ;) )

Title: Re: Looking for something on my Radio
Post by: cowparsleyman on October 03, 2018, 08:43:16 AM
@Mutrins (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20583) - Goodness me, all too kind, with some of my songs, one might be better enjoying the silence! Funny I do like the Mode (especially when Vince was with them), but didn't set out to sound like that one...thanks for the listen and the feedback.

@Binladeda (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18620) - Cheers oh wise one, I'm still figuring out your tasty fingering on the 'in a rush' (or whatever it's called) - really precise work there Mr B (what axe did you play it on?)  - as for this one, I appreciate your comments, Yeah - (@CaliaMoko - picked up that Beach Boys vibration (as it were)), it wasn't intentional, I just remembered that Erasure had a lot of layered BVox, as for my voice, I don't go much on it, but if others like it I go with it. Look forward to hearing from you. ;)

Thanks again for the positive feedback.

cpm