The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Bill Saunders on May 23, 2018, 07:26:10 PM
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Here you go - and just for fun. I borrowed some lyrics from an old song of mine - verses were written by Kerim Jones.
I recorded the vocals three weeks ago, and my doctor is reasonably confident there is no lasting damage to my vocal cords. My neighbours hope there might be. Had a heap of fun though!
https://soundcloud.com/bill-saunders/burn-burn-burn (https://soundcloud.com/bill-saunders/burn-burn-burn)
Burn Burn Burn
And we don’t want your scorn, We don’t want your lie
Ever since we were born, We’ve seen it in your eyes
And we don’t want your stories, We don’t want your war
We don’t want your glories, And we don’t know what you’re for
And we don’t want to be told, And we don’t want no rules
Just because you’re old, Don’t mean we are fools
And we don’t need your teaching, And we don’t need your schools
We don’t like your preaching, And we are not your fools
Welcome to your worst nightmare
Burn burn burn burn burn
You’ll never wake up
You can’t escape from us
So burn burn burn burn burn
And we don’t like your bloody days, And we hate your bloody nights
We want you to fade away, We want to do what’s right
And we don’t like the way you look, And we don’t like what you do
We know you don’t give a damn, We don’t give a damn for you
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Hi Bill!
I like your song! It has this youthful feeling too it. The lead guitar could be dirtier but the riffs are just right.
I can't help but to think the lyrics are inspired by the old horror movie The Burning but that's just me.
Good luck in the competition,
Martin
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Love it, Bill...you didn’t half give this some welly!
Absolutely brilliant...
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Yo Bill.
That's a great riff you got going.
Love the psychedelic bridge at 1.40 and the drop back into the punk feel.
Great vocals man,it has brought out your inner punk beast!
A fine interpretation. 8)
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Well if this is any example of what's in store from the contest - we're in for a treat. ;D ;D
Great guitar riff - angry vocals.
Suits the drum track to a T
Paul
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God - I was half asleep when I started listening to this - the drum pounding my head - but I like it - fun comes across - very rallying -good old fashioned aggression
Real war cry stuff - try and go back to sleep now
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New wave vibe with a nice bit of guitar going on.
Great bit of retro fun.
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Cracking guitar work on this one, lovely punky twang going on.
Really spearing the golden generation with those lyrics!
Really love the vocal effects in the break down there, good contrast provided by them.
I am wondering if anyone is gonna put a nice love song to this drum track at some point....mmmm ::)
Great stuff!
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Hi Bill,
This made me think of Sham 69.
Very cool punk vibe.
Strong riff - loved the tone.
Vocal fits well.
Nice middle section.
Digger
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Absolutely brilliant Bill. I've never heard you sing like this before. You've got the whole vibe nailed down 100% There is also some clever production stuff going on here which makes a very good track a very very good track. Sometimes doing something out of your comfort zone gIves you a totally different perspective. Anyway I absolutely loved it and will shut up now 8)
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Flippin' brill!
I was grinning all over.
Quite a departure for you but you should do more like it! Like Digger said, you're channelling Sham 69 here. Loved it.
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Love that nice, bouncy intro riff.
Yeah shammy attitude in the verses but more metal in the chorus. Goes together well though.
Nice sound for that solo....and good stuff where it leads into that trippy breakdown bit which is great.
Listening again reminded of somebody in the chorus but can't pin it down...it's the vocal I think...
Great entry Bill...really let it go here....lots of energy..with that drum track difficult not to! You must be tired now....got your voice back yet?
Nice one!
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You got that vintage punk sound down. Very cool. Very English sounding to my American ears, a very good thing. We love it when you say bloody. Haha. Glad you put that in there. You nailed it.
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This sounds fantastically authentic as a Punk track - but I really like the slight Country slant with the guitar
I also really like the "psychedelic" section before coming back with a punch back to the punk
Some of the sections make a perfect "drinking song"
My only suggestion would be to make the different sections a little more obvious as I got a bit lost with the structure - although I completely understand that the punk vibe you were going for was 100% all the time, which still works
Great interpretation!
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Once upon a time, when I was young and had lots of energy, I could have sung a song like this and meant it, but these days I'm content to listen to someone else get all wound up about things. Reminds me of my college days. <sigh> No nits.
Vicki
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I think this is the most "punk" interpretation so far, and none the worse for that. Sounds like you really enjoyed it. It's a great authentic rebellious lyric too - some things are just meant to be.
Very interesting when artists "go back" to punk rather than starting out as punkers - in this case there are definitely a few flavours from your other rock influences.
Really loving this competition! We should make the ultimate work-out album with the entries. Thankfully there's no copyright in drum recordings. Oh wait...
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You've for sure captured the 'clash' vibe with the punky guitars and aggressive vocals & lyrics.
Really like the 'Welcome to your worst nightmare' section, it goes somewhere I would have never thought of...the almost synth-like guitar following the vocal line is really cool.
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Hey Bill
Another great guitar riff!! (there's quite a few in the competition)....this song has a real punk sound and your vocal suits it perfectly (great vocals btw). I really like the contrast between the verses and chorus. I found it an unexpected change in style for the chorus and it really worked. Really good guitar work and bass throughout and well mixed.
Really strong song!
Darren
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One of my favourites from this excellent competition. A great tribute to the source material. I can hear the Clash coming through loud and clear! And Sham 69, and Stiff Little Fingers. The bridge is also superb. Does take a couple of listens to get everything that's going on. Superb work.
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Very punk influenced - I'm getting Sham 69 on crack after a night out with Alice Cooper. I thought the lyrics were perfectly dripping with attitude - very effective. I liked the psychedelic bit in the middle - a lovely contrast. Superb in every respect.
M
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world class riff bill
im thinking youve been there !
bounces lovely
drums really sit nice
going for it on the vocals actually reminds of john otway in the tone
buckets of attitude comes over real strong
great bridge
fine work
wow this comps producing amazing ideas
all down the rock garden tonight eh ?
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Hey Bill
doctor is reasonably confident there is no lasting damage to my vocal cords. My neighbours hope there might be. Had a heap of fun though
Haha that's what it's all about dude, no pain no gain! :)
Lyrics are very well put together, one of those where they feel like they should forced, but some a ross very natural and flowing - though obviously with a very distinct rhythem to them. I really enjoy them to be fair - will have to find this old song too!
See you embraced the punk execution which is awesome, the drums being loud at up front with the fighting guitar and sharp vocal execution sends that attitude from my ears all the way through. And holy mother of sh*t the break and drop back in is a thing of beauty - thought I knew what I was in for up until then - and how it dropped back in - bloody amazing.
Love it dude.
All the best,
Scott.