The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: pompeyjazz on May 23, 2018, 07:54:34 AM
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Ok - Y'all
Just over a week to go to get your entries in for the drum challenge comp so I thought I would kick it off with my entry.
Post your entries in Completed songs by midnight 31st May
I have no idea why I ended up writing a song about performance enhancing drugs in sport, but I did. Maybe it was the 169 bpm that got to me
**Edited by Boydie to embed the SoundCloud link ;D **
Epo Man
Oh you can think what you like
It aids performance when I'm riding on my bike
These boys might make me very rich
And I can raid the hoard thats stashed in my fridge
Yes, that is my plan
Blow you all away
I'm super epo man
You better wind me in
Just watch me throw that javelin
I'm here to medal nothing else
Don't think of ethics, don't think of health
Yes, that is my plan
Blow you all away
I'm super epo man
Cheers
John
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How do you get the soundcloud link inline like that?
Great track!
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@dasntn (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21309)
When you make the post there are new SOUNDCLOUD and YOUTUBE buttons that add the code to display
Just highlight your link and click the relevant button
The code should look like (and I will need to spell out the [ (Open Square Bracket) and ] (Close Square Bracket) as if I use the code it will put the SoundCloud link in! - there are no spaces between the brackets)
Open Square Bracket soundcloud Close Square Bracket PUT YOUR LINK HERE Open Square Bracket /soundcloud Close Square Bracket
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Love the lyrics. Haha. I have had my heart broken by cycling scandals too many times to count. It's really an interesting telling of the story, PJ. Your singing sounds great. Really like this one. I think it's my favorite song of yours since the supermarket one. Great job setting a high bar on this challenge!
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Yo pomps.
A rawkin riff,a driver for sure.
A novel topic for a song,but I'd expect no less from you.
This reminds me of an early Dr.Feelgood style,that could be Wilco battering away on his Tele and Lee on the Vox.
Audio dynamite and a great song. 8)
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Really like this, especially the spooky chord progression.
Definitely near the top of my list of favourite songs of yours John.
Really fits the brief and uses the drum tracks perfectly.
Top of the pompeyjazz drawer!
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Thanks @Boydie (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18510) for the inline info - makes things look much neater!
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How do you think of something PERFECT to protest about every time? So many of your tunes make me think - I Wish I Had Thought Of That.
Your lyrics hit home, and you have a great voice that suits the mood of this brilliantly John. The guitars are nothing short of awesome.
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Blows me away John!!
A very rocking driving song (hard not to be at that BPM) but you get so much in there! I absolutely love all the 'side' noises. The little explosions and synth sounds throughout - they work very well with and compliment the other instruments. Your vocal delivery is as strong as always and a great theme/set of lyrics.
Production is spot on! This is a very strong contender for this comp. The bar is set!
Cheers
Darren
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This is great!
Good song John. Some nasty synth sounds. The title makes me associate to the Omega man. Also isn't there a musical called Repo Men? Anyway nice futuristic vibe too it. Or maybe clinical.
I'm happy I just finished mixing my song before entering the forum. Your song could have gotten me completely of track.
All the best,
Martin
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To the manner born...
This reminded me of someone (I think it was Penny Smith - the photographer) who said that going on tour with the clash was like taking part in a commando raid carried out by the bash street kids...I think John would have fitted in there perfectly...both on-stage and off.
Brilliant and inspired. A riot of (y)our own :)
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Well so much for thinking everything was gonna sound the same with the same drum track. :o
A great high-energy track kept me on my toes until the end.
Nice job :D :D
Paul
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Obscure subject that made me chuckle :) - catchy backing track with several influences that merge well together - The retro sound that does not sound dated.
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Hi PJ,
Some great sounds in this.
Original sounding track; you're always re-inventing your sound. Great job.
I like the energy and drive in the vocal - sort of understated aggression.
Rocks well.
Not sure what the comp is for this - I've been out of circulation for a good while - but this will certainly be a contender.
Digger
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Irresistible riffs and sound effects in this John! Love the frantic nature of it... very new wave and unsettling ... an absolute winner. Loving this comp output so far...
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Hi John
really like this song - favourite of the competition so far. Great backing arrangement, lovely guitars, and brilliant vocals. A nod to the punk direction of the original drum track, but takes it in another direction as well.
Brilliant job!
Dave
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Vocal great on this one. Loving those synthy sounds in this one...gives it a flavour...don't know what of but not of punky 1977....maybe something a bit later...bit more experimental...like Magazine or somebody God knows who.
Like the guitar motifs...some really catchy musical hooks.
Quite a ride this one...imagining a cartoon of a little rocket speeding through the stars...up, up, up! Good work!
Another cracking song for the comp. All good stuff so far.
Think this one's gonna be shooting pretty high come vote time. Really knockout song.
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Another cracking interpretation
This has a fantastic "live" feel - I can almost picture the band on stage performing this in front of me
Cracking vocal delivery - I got a Punk meet s John Lennon Vibe
My only slight nit is I think the drums got buried a bit at times but everything else was driving it along so it didn't matter at all
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I like what you did with it. I missed having they lyric to read while listening....
Now I want to try something with an echo in it like you did.... ;D I like the energy. Improves my circulation. :)
No nits.
Vicki
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Doh ! I forgot to add the lyrics to the original post. Sorted now
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Who'd be a cyclist or javelinist (or insert sportist of choice here - I think we've only really touched the surface of all the "supplements" or "recovery aids" that go on behind the scenes in all of them).
The pressure must be immense to perform all the time and to push the limits - and even if you're not people assume you are...
Anyhow, it's really topical and timeless and super-catchy, very singalongable and headboppy. The guitar really drives it, and I think this feels like a home game for you. For a while I couldn't even recognise the drum track - which I think must be a good thing, you've taken it in a new direction.
Dare I say, an excellent "performance" and really challenging the "competition"... (ouch)
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Heya John!
Doesn't take much to get you super-creative and original. Haha I know what you mean wondering how you ended up where you are when writing to someone else' rhythm, it's a great feeling and came out fantastically well here. Smile straight on the face :)
Really gives off a feeling you're racing home to get more of that good stuff before it wears off, and always get there in time!
Vocals and music great as always, so too with incorporating the drums - but it's the attitude I love here, this high tempo is bringing out some gems! Sold the story completely.
Cheers,
Scott.
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Hey
Guitar riff is one of my faves of the comp and the two guitars play off each really nicely.
Very balanced production as well
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Hi John,
Amazing production - so dense and intricately arranged. A treat for the ears particularly on phones. It has all the energy and attack that the drum track suggests. A perfect showcase for your rock style vocals.
M
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real exciting track john
really pumps along
loads of ideas and passing of the ball in the mix
things popping up like on a ghost train
never a dull moment
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This is really excellent John.
Love the repeating guitar riff.
Got an 80s feel, with a Specials meets the Buzzcocks feel.
Clever lyrics
You made the challenge seem really easy....hats of to you.
Sandeep
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Hi John, loved the sounds in this and the chord progressions,all combining nicely to give an intriguing overall feel. Your throaty Lennon style vocal complementing too! Loved the guitar phrases along the way.
Good stuff!
Cheers
Jamie
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Hi John. Must admit. I didn't fully appreciate this on first listen. It grows exponentially though with every playthrough. (I'm on my 3rd listen) . This could be the winner for me. Melody is initially understated but the depth of production and an X factor I can't articulate makes this a front runner for me. Such a great competition. As a Clash fan I'm just blown away.
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I like these almost scratchy, agitated guitar sounds and catchy riffing. The song really moves along and captures an infectious energy for sure. Add on these drawling vocals and yes, it's a winner! ;)
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Great guitars - good track it didn't do it for me as much as some of your other songs but I'd still give it a 7 1/2 out of 10
Still an excellent number and I know it's a popular choice for the drum challenge