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Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Morefrog Jones on October 02, 2017, 11:20:44 AM

Title: Summertime Blue
Post by: Morefrog Jones on October 02, 2017, 11:20:44 AM
This was originally in WIP Section and i just realised that I never got round to finishing it - so I have had a bit of fun with it - Ive changed the original twist and although it never actually mentions it - In my mind its about my best surfer girl being killed by a shark - Ive given it a 1960/70's Film Noir feel - Basically ive just had some fun with it and its not to be taken too seriously - LOL

https://soundcloud.com/morefrog-jones/summertime-blue-final-demo

Ive Got the Summertimes Blue:

Ive got the summertime summertime summertime Blue.
The summers here but I cant get over loosing you.
This time last year we were walking down the beach.
But now you've gone I just cant find my feet

It wasn't long ago you were sitting by Christmas tree.
But by the spring they took you away from me.
And now it is your favourite time of year.
but all around me the waves crash like my tears.

Ive got the summertime summertime summertime Blue.
The summers here and I cant get over loosing you.
This time last year you were swimming in the sea.
But now I feel its a summer solstice misery.

You will always be my friend
Loyal to the end
You'll always be my favourite
(Surfer Girl) - (Lyric Not included)

Ive got the summertime summertime summertime Blue x 4

Ive got the summertime summertime summertime Blue.
The summers here but I cant get over loosing you.
This time last year we were walking down the beach.
But now you've gone I just cant find my feet
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: pompeyjazz on October 02, 2017, 05:55:20 PM
This is bags of fun Morefrog. Love the way that you've mashed this up. The dirty trombone is a great hook. You've got all sorts of stuff going on here and I'm having to go and have a few listens to it to work out everything that's going on.

Really cheered up my day  ;D

Nice one man  ;D
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Skub on October 03, 2017, 01:07:26 PM
Yo MFJ.

Lots of styles mixed into this one.

It starts off Tom Petty/Bob Dylan and the you stirred in some dancey 'doof doof'. Overall there is a Stones vibe permeating the track. Loved it.  :)

I'm always fussy about how a song ends and while it's good to have variation and contrast,generally I don't like the sort of ending where it sounds like someone just turned off the power. How a song ends can colour opinion on the whole piece and since a lot of work had gone into the rest of the song,it seems a shame to sink the ship for a ha'porth of tar.

Cool song.  8)
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: shadowfax on October 03, 2017, 03:12:04 PM
Huge sackful of all sorts in this mega song, you had fun doing it and i had fun hearing it.. :) :)
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: exfairy on October 03, 2017, 06:04:27 PM
This is fun! I love the brass in it! If I could make one suggestion, perhaps a less "clubby" drum track? Perhaps one to fit a brass band... Otherwise this is real fun - I can imagine hearing it in an old(ish) film (I'm a young 'un - anything before the millennium I consider old  :D)
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Silver Machine on October 03, 2017, 09:00:05 PM
Dude, I aint tapped my toes so much since the Tijuana Toe Tapping Tournament in 2012!
Awesome beat with a genuine surf guitar.
Are you from the same district as the singer from that Oasis band?
Great stuff, man.

Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: mickyplankton on October 03, 2017, 11:24:50 PM
Dude you got rock and roll in your genes. This, and those two you did with Pompey have totally seduced me. Where do we sign you up?
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: redrhodie on October 05, 2017, 01:52:58 PM
Reminds me of driving to Jones Beach from Manhattan in my friend's '68 Firebird convertible, a car worthy of the name Jezebel. You captured that day for me. Awesome!
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Wicked Deeds on October 05, 2017, 03:58:40 PM
Love the concept.  Very immediate, catchy, accessible song.  This could be a massive song and I’m sure, it will appeal to many!

Paul
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: skogge on October 09, 2017, 02:57:54 PM
For a synthguy I really liked... the first part! :D
When the song went clubby I lost interest. :(
The first part is garagerock/pop in the vein of Caesars (Palace) and the sound of your voice just added to that. Just loved the almost Krauty drive that made me wanna get up and dance. The clubby beat made me wanna leave early... ;)
For me a would like to hear it completed in the original style. Maybe I would really dance.

/ skogge
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Cawproductions on October 09, 2017, 05:20:29 PM
Dude,

Bangin tune, like the vocal style, Mixing it up,

Love the different styles you have going on.

Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Neil C on October 16, 2017, 06:20:14 PM
Lots to like here.
Driving beat just gets to you.
Love the ending too...
Q: How can this be fun if your girl friend has just ben 'ad by a shark, but that apart neat tune.
 :)
neil 
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Vandayay on October 17, 2017, 12:16:33 AM
Your keyboard sure has got a lot of knobs on it! You found the 'off' eventually  ;)

I like the surfer/indi sound, but I wasn't so keen on the electro dance section. They didn't seem to gell together. Sorry.
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: adamfarr on October 17, 2017, 02:46:43 PM
I have to admit that knowing the shark thing was coming I had to have a chuckle listening to the line: "now you've gone I just can't find my feet"...

I really like the experimentation here - in the first part I really got the grunty drummer sound (John Bonham?) so the sequencer bit was a bit unexpected, but very well arranged I have to say and the transition back into chorus is really good. Perhaps a bit too experimental for me towards the end as I wasn't sure where it was going (except for the shark bit) - perhaps a return to the chorus could also have worked to round things off?

But hats off, opinions can vary, but never boring.
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Cawproductions on October 17, 2017, 04:50:39 PM
MASHUP.....

Loving the vocal style, thought its gunna get all rocked up.....then the arps come in, all 70 disco then back to guitars, deep solos,

Pushing the boundaries.....great mix of styles and also gives me a different feeling as the song progresses.

Nice one.
Title: Re: Summertime Blue
Post by: Mikey on October 20, 2017, 07:55:55 PM
Great track, I like the mix of different genre's, bit of something for everyone. Love the video game noises and the shouty guy in the background, did you record it in the pub?

Seriously though, great job.

Mikey