The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Skub on September 14, 2017, 10:27:54 PM
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Nightmare Voodoo lady visits sleeping neurotic pensioner with indecent offers...well it was a dream,so sue me. :P
Man it was dark,like the chocolate,you had to be there. :o
I woke from sleep in a cold hard sweat
She was standing by my bed
You know where I am if you need me,she said
Her touch was as cold as the dead
A scream arose in my throat
Yet was stifled and undeclared
Do I dream or wake as I sit on the bed?
Am I ready or unprepared?
The telephone rang,time to arise
Appointments need to be kept
Eight hours in bed and my body still said
It feels like I haven't slept
She said,all you see
Is not what you see
You must leave it all behind
The cloak and the veil of everyday life
Is only in your mind
When I cut you down from the dance of life
You felt chilled right through
I knew from that moment on
You had killed me too
She said,all you see
Is not what you see
You must leave it all behind
The cloak and the veil of everyday life
Is only in your mind
https://soundcloud.com/skub1955/voodoo-blooz
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Yowzers!
That's some mighty fine axe swinging skub ;D
Well written, well produced, well sung well - everything. ;D ;D
A strong contender fo sho!
Paul
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I could see myself as Elvira dancing with the Count to that! Very fun. Good party song.
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You didn't mess about Davy - Excellent guitars and your vocals and harmonies get better and better man. The lyrics gave me a right chuckle as well.
I think the breakdown worked very well, just at the right time
And that guitar solo :) :) :) :) :) :)
Excellent as ever
:)
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Greetings Mr. Skub ;D
Top class song old chap ;D Some nice twiddly guitar playing, bit of
'Jeremiah was a bullfrog' came to mind at the start....which was nice ;D
Really liked the brake, great change of pace and contrast, to the rest of it.
works really well.
I get the feeling you might have played the Blues before.....a few times ;D ;D
Enjoyed listening to this mate..... ;D
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What a blood-cool blooz!
I like the punchy snare, and of course that cool-as-ice-cold-bodies guitar solo. (the solo could be turned even louder in the mix for my taste)
Makes me feel like banging my head against the coffin cover.
Bye Wolfi
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Maybe not the spookiest but still good!
I like the air and presence in your voice.
It could maybe have been made a bit more dizzy and hypnotic.
Martin
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Blimey!!this is good....stunned silence follows... :) :) :)
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So professional and fully formed - smokey and smouldering - leaving me with the taste of Jack Daniels and a cheap woman on my lips.
Cant say I actually enjoyed it - but that would be my anti country music bias coming out rather than the quality of the song. a good early contender and with so many wannabe cowboys of this forum - its got to be in with a chance ;)
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Hi Skub,
great song, reminds me of Credence Clearwater Revival, definitely a good thing.
Although you sound very happy for a dark song. There again who wouldn't?
Good luck in the competition,
Keith
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Excellent playing and production. Lyrics are deliciously dark. The music/production could be a bit darker to suit the lyrics. It's very ZZ Top which is awesome but I would have preferred a bit more Cramps style to give it more of an edge.
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Nice guitars Davy. That riddim (never can spell that word!) guitar sound is great. Loved the intro 2nd time around....first time it lost me a bit...or I got lost myself rather.
Like those subtle Creamy bvs again! Really like those bvs!
That 'she said' bit is good - more like big O here - and the following break excellent.
Bit early for Halloween isn't it? Will you be releasing your Xmas single soon?
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And was this lady wearing a nurses uniform and was the cold hard touch the bedpan? ;D
I never thought I'd review a song of yours where the vocal was as good as the guitar playing. Such a great vocal Davy! I love the harmony bits that sound like Cream?
Here you are playing some fine rhythm and blues with the cleanest sound Ive ever heard! I realy like it, It sounds like Dr. Feelgood after a much needed bath!
And now you're ripping it up with some fab fast soloing, which will probably leave your old fingers complaining for weeks, I shouldn't be surprised. ;D
A super listen, I find most Rhythm and blues boring, but not this.
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Paulski
Cheers Paul. :)
redrhodie
Ha! Gothic goodtimes! :D
pompeyjazz
You aren't meant to giggle John,you are supposed to be scared! :D
Binladeda
Heh,Three Dog Night! I wonder how many recall them? ;D
Wolfini
Ta man. :D
Martinswede
I need moar drugs to be moar hypnotic! :D
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shadowfax
Ta Kev. :)
Morefrog Jones
Er..country? Have I failed so utterly recording a blues track,it's mistaken for country? :D
diademgrove
I love me some Fogerty,Keith. 8)
mickyplankton
Ta Micky,I'm more Billy's generation than the Cramps,which may account for that!
Viscount Cramer
Ya snooze,ya lose Count. Ta for the listen. ;D
tinam
:D @ Tina.
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What a great vocal, Davy :o
Great song too...absolutely smashed it! Great guitar work, of course...and I really enjoyed the lyrics.
A real treat.
What a great vocal. Did I mention the vocal? It's great :)
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Damn, this is a real treat! That guitar playing! Perfect mixture of taste and sleaze. And the vocal is extremely credible, perfect for the track. I can't fault it. The only thing I would have done differently is bring the vocal in more quickly in the quiet break-down. Was ever so slightly disjointed for me. But it's a tiny detail in an otherwise excellent track.
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Man, that was CHEWY.
Had real substance and felt like it came from somewhere deep, deep in the south.
Superb singing and both guitar solos are just sublime.
I didn't think I was a 12 bar blues guy but now I think this voodoo may have converted me.
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Brilliant! Perfectly formed...
Fab simple, clever lyrics with humour. Great vocal - brings the deathly nightmare to life! Awesome guitar solos. Really cool backing vocals.
I didn't feel like I needed the second breakdown if I'm honest, I think it would already be perfectly formed without it.
Great stuff!
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Skub,
Great feel with the tremeloed guitar and the drums, giving it that slow swamping feel.
Vocals are really good with that high vibrato singing those lyrics.
With Becky about the 2nd breakdown.
Great BV's. Then you let rip fab tone and playing
:)
neil
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PaulAds
Ta very much Paul,I get so tired of my own voice at times,so it's cool you enjoyed it. :)
tone
I think you are right about the break down. Glad you liked it. :)
PaulyX
It came from the deep north of the Antrim coast. :D Ta for the comments Paul.
beckylucythomas
Good to hear from you Becky. I think you and tone are bang on with the breakdown comments.
Neil C
Cheers Neil. I think the breakdown vote is conclusive! :D
I shall tinker further,thanks for the input everyone. :)
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Hi
I could imagine Jonny Depp in a Tim Burton music video for this.
The vocal is great. BVs work very well.
Sounds creepy, rather than scary maybe.
Top guitar work.
I like the second breakdown. A twist in the plot.
Rocking Horror Music Show.
Digger
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Good storytelling - and in the lyrics you went for quite a challenging rhyme scheme and pretty much nailed it.
Maybe I am looking at things too simplistically (my default mode) but I'll confess was left feeling a bit "un-dark" as most things seemed so smooth (maybe those BVs?!). The guitar solos had some nice bite but I was thinking "how could we add more voodoo to this?" But I didn't have an answer. And I really enjoyed the music, production, vocalising and playing. So what do I know? (Don't answer that...)
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digger72
Ta digger,lots of folk interpreting the theme as 'scary' in stead of 'dark'. ;)
adamfarr
Maybe I'm too easily scared Adam. Ta for the listen. :D
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Well that was a bit sexy wannit!!!! (& spooky of course!) great dynamics and just fucking awesome guitar work mate!!!
Nicely sung with some good backing stuff going on. Lyrics are cool!
The winner is the music though Davy!!! Just awesome!
I doth my cap to u sir!
Leo ;D
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I wish I had inspirational dreams like you. Or even dreams I could share in public.
This is exceptional. I love you letting rip with the guitar, and especially enjoyed the outro, that is top notch. Vocals are spot on too, and you have natural emotion in them which is a wonderful trait. Strong song construction and production - did you say recently you've only been in DAW land for a year?
Brilliant stuff Davy, well done.
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Quality production and delivery.
Although not in your face scary or dark - song left me unsettled so must have hidden dark depths.
Smokey feel with a impending darkness about something bad was going to help.
Works well as the song gets into full swing.
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Hey Skub,
Beautiful guitar tone and playing. Love the vocals as always. Great stop at the almost midway point, followed by some cool mellow, guitar playing. Fine lyrical concept and I love the stripped back section that introduces the solo to close this song.
Great track
Paul
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Scaring story! Your voice gives a touch very interesting to your song.
It is good to read lyrics like yours.
See you!. Mora
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LostBoy
You are a sick man Leo! :D
Bill Saunders
Thanks Bill,sometimes I think the DAW has taken over my life and I need to step away! ;D
Morefrog Jones
I was going for that dark and disturbing thang,maybe it's works for some? Ta for the listen. :)
Wicked Deeds
Thanks Paul. :)
moraamarolaloba
Cheers mora. :)
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Well Mr Skub, I'm not usually a fan of songs that are based around a 12 bar pattern but this kept me interested.
That guitar is just ace! If I could play the geetar, that's how I'd want to sound. In fact tell me what crossroads you used to obtain those skills and I'll be straight down there.
Very authentic sounding without being cheezey. Great harmonies and that break down section was a nice contrast.
A touch of the macabre works well with the blues here.
Good stuff.
Yodasdad
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top marks skub
really good vocal especially in that lovely change toward the end where it really shines, neat surprise unexpected
great stuff
thought the drummer was a little buried in places, or was taking a phone call cos then hed reappear again .
such a good groove tho and it may well fall apart if you brought the drums up anyway so dont listen to me..
guitars hint of creedence & mick green and the zz man billy ? and all on good days !
really great number
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Hi, I'm new here. I really enjoyed the arrangement and production of this. Great vibe. BGVS are mighty tasty. Solos lays beautifully.
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This is wonderful! I love the guitar. And the whole thing, yeah.
I have no nits at all. I just want to listen again.... ;D
Vicki
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Yodasdad
Cheers man. With the guitar you just keep playing and one day you wake up old! :D
nooms
Yeah,drums are ever a work in progress with me,sometimes I hit on something and other times it's a more laboured affair. I do tend to have the drums play softer in some parts in an attempt to create the dynamics a real drummer would supply,maybe I didn't get it quite right,or maybe it's a mix thing?
Cmerk
Thanks for taking the time to listen and comment. :)
CaliaMoko
Keep on listening Vicki. ;D
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Really groovy!! Great feel and production to this Skub and gorgeous guitar playing as usual. That solo rocked!! OH and there's another blistering solo! Excellent playing.
Really loved this track.
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Wicked idea with fabulous arrangement, guitars and solos. You smashed it. Loved the end melody change. Lyrics, vocals and backing brilliant. Truly madly creepy n groovy.