The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Skub on August 03, 2017, 11:48:15 PM
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We all know them,don't we.
The joy vampires,the leeches of the soul,those who delight to piss on yer chips,the schadenfreude celebrators amongst us. :(
This song may encapsulate the female variety,but this trait is not gender specific in any way,as eny fule no. Miserable is miserable.
Hope you enjoy the miserable song. :)
I'll permit dancing to this one,but only late in the day and only wearing the darkest of Goth gear.
I used my son's 6 string bass as a rhythm guitar on this one....just because I could. :D
https://soundcloud.com/skub1955/little-miss-monochrome/s-xDdcB
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Damn! I love the bass as a rhythm guitar tho I was expecting a darker tone. Still the lyrics are pretty great and this song ooozes david bowie! I dig! Very neat in the production and I love the arpegiated synth. This is super up beat for a song about sad people, especially that guitar solo? Is that a tele?
I like how the guitar plays over the words at the end. Great Work!
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Damn, part 2. Those guitars, man. S-wwww-eeet. Fab stuff. :)
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Skubby!
Nice one - love those subdued harmonies and the poppy lead vox.
Lyrics are spot on too - great word economy!
And the guitars, oh the guitars - worth far more than the price of admission fo sho!
I'm still humming that hook ;D
Paul
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up and up the level goes..good pop song with interesting bits...nice guitar work..just thought the vocal was a bit too loud ...
cheers, Kevin
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Very good. Very catchy and a joy to listen to it. As other said the guitars are fab. I like the lyrics and the idea and they work really well, despite the minimalism. Only nit is the word Kodachrome. Been a fair few years since Kodachrome was around, this is the age of digital. I'm not sure what the replacement would be, or if it's needed, but it did jump out at me.
Derek
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This is great, Davy...
Tootles along very nicely and the guitars are beautiful. I really liked the drums too...is that Logic Pro's "drummer" thing? It sounds brilliant...but that's as much to do with what you've done around it as the drums themselves...knits together lovely anyway, whatever it is :D
Fun lyrics too...the whole nine.
An excellent pop record, as they used to say.
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Hi Skub, had a Bowie esque feel to it, which I enjoyed. Liked the instrumentation and arrangement. Nicely played too, loved the guitar solo very sultans of swing ;). You just keep on writing them, coz u can! ;D
Great stuff as usual!
Cheers
Jamie
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This is a great piece of catchy, upbeat, melodic pop. Great lyrics, cleverly constructed. That six string bass is sounding lovely as are all the guitars. You sound more and more like the Big O all the time which is wonderful. Harmonies work a treat. Another slice of absolute quality Davy. Hey yer knocking out a lot of stuff these days. Bet you're glad you went into DAW land :)
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Hi Skub
Another great track, as has been said the guitar work is top notch as usual, like the vocals too, some nice harmonies in there, a little quiet behind the guitar towards the end but thats the only criticism I have.
Nice job, Mikey
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I really like this.....nice and fresh sound...up-beat.......has that Dire Straights vibe in those great guitars.
Good stuff, man! I really enjoyed the tune ;D
-Tom
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Hmm...very nice.
Catchy chorus, great guitar sounds and harmonies.
Really liked the guitar solo section and the way the high passed vocal hook came in over it.
There's a real country flavour to this without it being obvious country.
The synth section toward the beginning caught me off guard but it worked.
All in all I thought this was terrible, what are you doing with your life?.........sorry, I had a monochrome moment!
Really....great stuff.
Yodasdad
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Great fun and the 6 string bass works a treat. Agree with Kevin re the vocals being a bit to up front.
Love the guitar solo (shades of Mr Knopfler there, if you are familiar with him? ;D)
The first half was good but the second was great!
A most enjoyable listen!
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giitriddles
Bowie eh? That's a new one,but I'll take it. :D The guitar is a home made Strat. Thanks for the comments,Nate.
Cazrollina
I'm happy you liked it Caz. :)
Paulski
Good man Paul,hum it to everyone you meet! :D
shadowfax
I lowered the vocal a few db. See what you think Kev,if you are back this way. :)
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Hey pal
Love listening to your guitar! Reminds me a little of Mr Knopfler. You're a great player. Something I've liked with all your songs is the harmonies in your vocal - you do each harmony yourself yeah? It works really well. The bass here is great and a really dig the trippy section in the middle.
Lyrics are short and concise but super. Many of them sorts of people about :P and funnily there's so much colour to this track it's like your really sticking it to them.
Great track and performance. Thanks, Darren.
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Hi Davy
Super polished guitars as ever, and yeah, the Big O meets Van the man on the vocals. Lovely tune, easy listen and very nice all round.
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delboy
Ha! I'm a product of my era,Derek,though I preferred the warmer tones of Fujichrome. :D
PaulAds
Thanks Paul,yes it's Logic's drummer,plus I added in a beats loop for extra punch in places. It gave the song a bit of a stomp. :)
Jamie
Sums it up Jamie,we all do it because we can. ;D
pompeyjazz
Cheers John. DAW certainly opens doors,doesn't it? 8)
Mikey
Ta Mikey. If it's the vocals at the end you mean,I did them purposely in the background. Maybe sounds to you like I messed up? I'm always fiddling! :D
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Love this! Would you mind if I toyed with some additional lyrics for it?
I hear so much Neil Young in your music.
For Kodachrome, vibrant world would fit.
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Why don't you take your clouds
And blow away
Stop casting shadows
And raining decay
You're a human Supernova
Vacuum of light
Consuming optimism
Joyless parasite
You're a buzz kill
On a bar high
On an open sore
You're a botfly
Go away pest
Get a move on
Or I'll grab my can of
bug-be-gone
:D
Just having some fun. I'm off for a walk in the summer sunset. Toodles.
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As a lot have said the guitars are great but I actually liked the synths just as much - nice understated break in the middle and they add a lot of texture throughout. I also dig the effects you've put on your voice a lot. The whole thing has a lot of poise and is balanced just right, nothing too overdone. Great stuff Skub.
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Title hooked me in straight away - felt very innovative with many different genres mixing.
The overall country feel is so 'not my thing' but I found it an enjoyable listen and it had a certain catchiness and radio friendly feel to it.
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IronKnee
Thank ya Tom,I do love mister Knopfler. ;D
Yodasdad
Heh,what can I say? I do mix my genres..yet always seem to end up country! A few years ago I'd have topped myself at the thought! :D
Jambrains
I dropped the vocals a little JB,ta for the heads up. :) Knopfler? never heard of him. :P
Darren1664
This Knopfler bloke again...does he play like me or something? ??? :D
Yeah,the harmonies are all me Darren,'cos that all I have to work with at the moment!
Thanks for the comments. :)
Bill Saunders
Yo Bill,I can never escape the big O,can I,Van is a new one tho.. 8)
Jenna
Cool Jenna,glad you liked it. Ta for the contributions. 8)
PaulyX
Ta Paul,I'm a pretty poor keys player,if you could call me a player at all.I just use the 'musical typing' and hit it with my head wand. :D
Morefrog Jones
I'm glad it caught ya man,ta for listening. :)
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I really like this. My favorite line, and one I wish I'd written, is "you're like a sunset, on a rainy day."
Hope it's okay to pull up the oldies. I'm new around here, so they're all new to me. I heard this one when I first joined, but didn't comment.