The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra on June 30, 2017, 10:51:29 PM
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Horribly inauthentic hybrid which I wouldn't allow anyone else to do but excuse myself like a total hypocrite because I've listened to a hell of a lot of this stuff!
Anyway it's only for the competition.....didn't want to be left out.
Under A Jacaranda
Forty-one high summer
The hottest time of the year
Holidays are fun baring your body in the sun
Everyone's gonna come
and make a party down here
Holidays are fun baring your body in the sun
And I'll be there on a bench
Smoking a cigarette
I'll be with all my friends
Under a jacaranda
Thirty-one brandy sours
A hundred bottles of beer
Holidays are fun drinking cheap brandy in the sun
Currant bun, happy hour
Revelation is near
Holidays are fun drinking cheap brandy in the sun
And I'll be there on a bench
Passing the bagaceira
I'll be with all my friends
Under a jacaranda
Twenty-one sweet Paloma
Spends all day on the beach
Holidays are fun baring your body in the sun
With her friend Melanoma
Burning up like a hot-house peach
Holidays are fun baring your body in the sun
And I'll be there on a bench, on a bench
Smoking a cigarette, cigarette
Watching the pretty girls, pretty girls
Under a shady tree, under a jacaranda
https://soundcloud.com/cramer1930/underajacarandawav3 (https://soundcloud.com/cramer1930/underajacarandawav3)
Could have used more time to refine the mix...but it'll have to do for now!
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Hey Count, Just got there man. Love that brass. How do ya do that? Touch of Paul Simon, Brilliant
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Yo VC
This is the kind of roots stuff found on any Ry Cooder album,I'm a huge Cooder fan,so that's just dandy.
I love the arrangement and implementation of the various instruments,the brass is as cool as a penguin's pootang. I'll have to learn myself some of that. :)
Infused by summer. :)
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Ole,etc :P
Brass steals the show here, I reckon...it sounds brilliant.
Cool summer tune and paints a lovely picture of having better things to do than what we're probably currently doing. Something to look forward to!
Nice going, VC :)
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Like the others said, I love the brass. And all the instrumentation. I love the "island" style; I can't remember what that's called, but it's a style I favor. I don't have any nits. LOVE the line "With her friend Melanoma"!
Vicki
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Takes me to Southern Africa and back. perfect for a sunny Sunday morning.
Keith
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Can't go wrong with steel drums, drinks and trumpets on the beach for a summer song comp ;D
I love this laid back vibe and the brass sounds wonderful :o
Did you do all the BVs, because they sound very authentic :o
Very fun and clever lyrics, and you sing them really well :)
Great production, VC :) Good luck!
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Great hip-wiggling African vibe here. I had to look up what a 'Jacaranda' was too so it was also educational. I like the ambiguity of the lyrics too - wasn't sure if you are in love with summer or being cynical about it: I like that kind of slipperiness in a lyric. Good luck in the comp.
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I don't know what a jacaranda is but I think I need one.
This has got me bouncing away as I'm typing, can't help but move to it, and I'm usually stiff as a board, nice one.
Love the brass, sounds very authentic.
Some nice lyrics, liked the melanoma line.
Probably a bit on the long side for me but in a live party setting I can imagine people wanting it to go on forever.
Yodasdad
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Hey sir Ian - this was a surprise.!
What an amazingly summerry song!
There is nothing I don't love here. ;D ;D
The percussion, brass, vocals, BVs feel, groove.. I've run out but the song hasn't ;D ;D
Pass the rum please ;D
Gotta be top three or better IMHCO
Paul
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Hi Ian, brilliant guitar very reminiscent of the South African style used on Paul Simons Graceland album. Great arrangement and as others have said, the horns fit brilliantly. Excellent stuff Ian, I think this is the best thing I've heard from you!
Nice one!
Cheers
Jamie
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Hi VC,
Well, this a delight.
Great mood. So sunny.
Great sounds throughout - especially the brass. Sound so real.
Who did the BVs - awesome.
Really well constructed.
Mix sounds perfect to me.
Digger
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Thanks for listening people...and for your kind comments.
Glad it's gone down OK...I'm quite pleased with it...took quite a while!
I didn't steal too much...anyway all soukous seems to follow much the same pattern..a variation on I-IV-V...arpeggio guitar parts..Latin-style horns...extended instrumental outro for half the song.
Can't take any credit for the horns...loops boys. I have actually paid real money for a horn loop and sample CD download cos I use them a lot though these don't come from there.
Yes, I sang, played or programmed everything else...no other loops!
Hey, thanks Jamie for mentioning the guitars...took a lot of time and takes as I'm not very good really!
Cheers folks!
ps. I love summer and don't cast judgement on anybody who wants to bake on a sunbed and sleep off the hangover from the previous night's holiday carousing....done it myself yonks ago....but if I was still living in the Algarve where I spent 4 years I would be one of the guys on the bench in the shade somewhere!
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Hi VC,
Bloody love this. ;D ;D Just love that guitar playing/sound,
and the brass......perfect ;D ;D
Always has been a style that I find difficult to get to grips with.
Doesn't come easy when playing....so BIG respect from me. ;D
This is definitely the best I've heard from you, and the last one
you did got my vote in SOTM. You're on a roll ;D ;D
Wouldn't be surprised if this won.....it's brilliant ;D
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Made me smile from the beginning. It’s all about the music - ‘Graceland’, ‘Rhythm of The Saints’ territory. It has a summer feel and a dancing party atmosphere. What more can we ask for! Quality!
Paul
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A good all round sound and like the others..like the brass,
A successful song methinks.. :)
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I'm going with Carribbean on this but I think those guitars are definitely African - maybe we'll settle on fusion...
Under a Jacaranda has got so many more subtlties than "under a tree", even a palm tree. Great song concept and a feast of sounds and rthyms - I think the intersection between the guitars, brass, percussion and vocals is what makes it so interesting - quite Eno-esque I would say (if it wasn't already a thing from around the world...).
Appreciate the craft here too - 41, 31, 21... and the currant bun, very clever stuff.
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Yes! Ive never been to the Caribbean, but I feel like i just did! Lovely soundscape, perfect combination of instruments and another wicked arrangement with fab lyrics.
Right. Im off to get a rum and coke with a cocktail umbrella thrown in. Feeling inspired. Might even put my feet in the sand pit. ;D
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Thanks for the wonderful comments you guys....it was worth the time and effort to get such a positive response....I nearly gave up after losing everything because of a corrupted project file...had to start again from scratch...but the research was all done!
Bin, thanks for the nice words on the guitar playing. Coming from you that's a big compliment! Thanks for ALL your support.
WD - yes it's all about the music. I know the best known songs from Graceland but it's from listening to the likes of Pépé Kallé that influenced this.
Kev - if you thought the sound was OK then I'm happy!
Adam - Glad you enjoyed the song concept (not quite all about the music then!) The scenario is from my time in Algarve where the benches opposite the Café Central in our village were shaded by jacaranda trees.....
Definitely African though soukous grew out of Congolese Rumba itself influenced by Cuban music much of which came from Africa in the first place.....so yeah a bit Caribbean too!
Caz - glad it moved you! Hope you didn't drink too much of that rum....
Only really did this for the comp....quite an exercise but I had some fun with it.
Back to the jazzy blues for the next one...or some laid-back funky jazz fusion thing...whichever gets finished first.
EDIT...oops forgot...thanks to anyone who helped propel the song into that lofty joint third spot!
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Im dancing in my mind moving with the flow, cool 8) i think the words is cocoa dance, or something like that, anyway, sounds real good.
Has me straying side to side, real cool 8)
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Hi cramer :)
This too, has a great tasteful groove, with the bongos coming in, the choir stuff and trumpets.
You know how to write and arrange that kind of music; i don't; i just enjoy the listening.
What I can say i terms of improvement: you could be more careful with the vocals; intonation and rhythm; it could be more on the point.
apart from that; very very entertaining; joyful; playful; full of life and energy and i thank u 4 sharing.
B.
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Hi I just came across this and I know it's a few months old but I love this - the reggae / ska bounce and happy feel to it - I love it
Katie xxx
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Ah, it has returned. One of my all-time favourite forum songs. Can I urge everyone's to give this a second outing. It is a great song!
Paul