[Allan]

I've just finished writing this, please let me know what you think. Its about a love that goes much deeper than flesh and bones.


Will you still love me when I’m old and grey?
or when my hair has fallen out and my knees have given way.
Will you still want me to be by your side
with my hearing aid in and my specs on my eyes.
Will you still want to know the dreams that I’ve had
Will you laugh at my jokes and hold me close when I’m sad
Will you still be the one that I confide in,
Make me strong when I’m weak and tell me not to give in.

Chorus

    All of these things I need for you to know,
    that though the laughter lines appear and the warts they may grow
    my love for you will never grow frail
    even when my eyes hide the truth of my age,
    and my body it tells the tales.

Is there still going to be excitement when we meet,
after we’ve found ourselves apart
and as our hand caress each other,
will there be a flutter in your heart.
As I gaze at your beauty and lose complete track of time.
will your eyes realise and look right back into mine

Chorus

    All of these things I need for you to know,
    that though the laughter lines appear and the warts they may grow
    my love for you will never grow frail
    even when my eyes hide the truth of my age,
    and my body it tells the tales.

So as the years go by and everyday life takes its toll
know that you make me feel so alive that I could never feel old.
I count each day a blessing and cherish each moment that we share,
let the rest keep their wealth, I can love you anywhere.

All of these things I need for you to know,
that though the laughter lines appear and the warts they may grow
my love for you will never grow frail
and with each day another adventure
that I look forward to telling the tales.

[Saeed AlSuri]

Hello Allan ..

Very nice .. I like it .. the subject is great .. for me .. being old man ..

But if you read this article .. it's not .. according to the writer of it ..

http://musicclout.com/contents/article-124-10-tips-for-better-lyric-writing.aspx

I don't believe in any thing she says about writing lyrics by the way .. read it for fun ..

cheers..

[Wicked Deeds]

Very beautiful!

Well done Allan!

Paul

[benjo]

hi allan,

nice write mate very touching, well done to you
keep it up,  tony...

[Allan]

Saeed - thank you very much you are very kind. In my opinion age is but a number, though with four children running about my house they're enough to make me feel old sometimes , I did read the article some of the points she makes are valid but I've always just made it up as I've gone along, I've never been one for rules!

Wicked Deeds, Benjo - thank you both, I haven't long been putting my lyrics out there for anyone to read and it means a lot to think that people might like them and I might be doing something right.

Al

[Jess]

I liked this one, when I saw the title I wasn't really drawn in because I knew it would be a love ballad, but I'm glad I did click on it because it is very good. I like the specific details, hearing aids, warts, laughter lines, they really paint the picture of ageing
My only improvement would be, the verse beginning 'is there still going to be excitement when we meet' seems to have a different rhyming pattern to the others...or maybe you've just layed the lines out differently...actually I think you've done that, ignore me

[hardtwistmusic]

I love it that the verses are all questions and the chorus "resolves" the questions. 

I love the use of questions in songs. 

Your lyrics all flow and sing easily.  I can always count on singing them on the first time through as I read.  Not necessarily how they NEED to be sung, but your lyrics always "suggest" a cadence that lets them be sung. 

I'm guessing you have cadence (if not the actual tune) in your head when you write lyrics???

[Allan]

Hi jess, thank you very much, I shall have to be careful with the titles that I chose not to put anyone off  LOL. I'm glad that you like it, I do have a tune that I sing it to and its reassuring that it might be worthy of putting it out there for others to listen to, (fear of rejection and all that) al

[PeeJay]

The title made me think of Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow by Carole King i think.

I liked this as it has a certain charm.

The guy has to be careful though as older women are in vogue these days and he may get ditched for a younger model!

Nice one,

Phil.

[Allan]

Hi Phil, thank you. Lol I'll keep that in mind 
Al