The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: montydog on June 06, 2018, 09:09:44 AM
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Hi Folks,
This is a new version of a song I wrote around 4 years ago but I was never happy with the recording. I think this version is an improvement and benefits greatly from a beautiful mastering job of my final mix carried out by Boydie. Thanks maestro :-)
All comments are welcome but most of all, I hope you enjoy it!
M
https://soundcloud.com/alan-walker-4/winterwindow
Please don't look for me
Through your winter window
It won't be my face you see
When December winds blow
I've got to keep moving on
Won't let the grass grow
I've never stayed around too long
Just a face in a fading photo
It won't be my voice you hear
In your sleeping hedgerow
Just a note in the call
Of the lonely laughing black crow
I asked you when this all began
With summer's first swallow
Did you really need a man
Who just lives for tomorrow
My steps are quiet memories
On your frosted meadow
Made by a ghost set free
That never casts a shadow
Please don't sit & cry
This love has caused you sorrow
All that's in this world must die
Like melted summer snow
In the spring's warming light
A quiet whispered "hello"
Like a fingers dancing flight
On the strings of a cello
Before the winter comes again
And the leaves leave the willow
You won't remember me
Forgotten song on the radio
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This is really lovely Alan. The lyrics are beautiful and the guitar is glorious! (As always, but even better here.)
Some songs just deserve another go, I’ve done that with a couple of mine.
Good on ya mate. No nits from me, fab stuff! ;D
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Hi Alan, I didn't realise this was one of your old songs till after I'd listened. I had been thinking it was 'just' another of your well constructed and imaged lyrics ;). Just shows you've had the gift for a while! You sang it well and I felt a chime with your comments about production. You've always written and performed good songs, but lately you've learned how to pull together the elements of arrangement, Instrumentation and production, and you can really hear that on this.
Good stuff!
Cheers
Jamie
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Hello Alan...this is so very well done...your vocal just made me think of a fat lass lying under a chocolate fountain, with her wide-open mouth strategically positioned directly beneath the spout. Acoustic sounds lovely too. It’s not really my thing...but that’s neither here nor there...it’s perfectly done...and the lines
“Did you really need a man
Who just lives for tomorrow”
Were, I thought, as good as anything I’ve seen for a while. Ambiguous, too...is he careful and thoughtful, planning their future together? or cunning and devious, figuring who’s going to be next to massage his ego? I enjoy being able to fill in some of the blanks myself...I always think your lyrics paint quite a detailed picture, yet still leave room for some of the listeners input...which is very engaging.
Anyway...I do tend to ramble...so there we are.
Very nice.
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Beautiful. Love the guitar and the rhythm. Your voice is so romantic. Swoon. 😊
Love the steel guitar. I wish there was more of it, but I guess I'll just have to play it again.
Lovely song all around.
Lynn
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Yo Alan.
The way this song builds gradually and organically is delightful. Every nuance welcomed warmly. Glassy guitar around 1.50. Is that you?
I think you should be happy with the song now,I certainly loved it. Easy like Sunday morning! 8)
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Hi sent me to sleep and I mean that in a good way - so gentle so relaxing , your voice purrs like a rolls Royce engine , I was mesmerised under your spell - you could have been singing about dog poo and I would have loved it
Nice country like feel to it. - lovely song xx
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Hi Alan,
I agree with everyone so far...except I wasn't in the forum 4 years ago so it's brand new to me AND I can't say it painted strikingly vivid image for me like it did for Paulads! Though I enjoyed his image. ;D
Not my favorite type of theme but very lovely all the same.
Vicki
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Solid song and strong performance as ever. Lush and detailed mix, personally I'd have prefered a tad less reverb on the vox (which is just fab of course!) when the vocals are so up-front-in-your-face. Nice build as the song progress and extra kudos for the rhytm playing in the first verse, great groove there with just a single guitar, me like! Top drawer stuff, well done!
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I'm echoing all the others. Really enjoyed the build of the mix. And my, what bea-uuuuuuuuuuoootiful guitar playing and vocal delivery. Classy, timeless music and ace vocals melting away the worries of the day. And clever lyrics too.
But now I've got an urge to find a 'bloomin chocolate fountain...
I'll have to settle for a mars bar :) lol
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Nice one Alan - lots to like - guitars, your silken vox and the organ stood out for me.
Also liked that tasteful solo in the middle - good arrangement.
Oh, and perfect length for a ballad!
Songs like this are worth preserving IMHCO. :D
Paul
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Great tune. Very relaxing and kind of takes you on a trip through the countryside in your mind. I can picture this song as an opening to a movie or something.
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Hello!
I agree with previous commentors. I found this very relaxing to listen to. Definatly somthing I would put on a rainy day with a cup of some nice freshly made earl grey or something. Love that organ-sound.
Solid piece of art. Nothing I thought of I would do different here. Great work!
/Tommy
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Alan,
Always liked this song and lyrics.
Your vocals are sounding fabulous, mellow, warm and worn.
And love the steel solo, so evocative.
:)
Neil