The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Lyrics => Topic started by: SilverBeat on November 26, 2017, 04:17:13 PM
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My October 2017 song, "I Still Haven't Found What I Need" was inspired by a conversation I had with my sister in law, about the Rolling Stones. In short, I told her that my Favorite Rollings Stones song was "It's Only Rock N Roll". She said her's was "You Can't Always Get What You Want". That's all it took. I started thinking about my own wants and needs.
https://www.reverbnation.com/silverbeat/song/28791467-i-still-havent-found-what-need
Cheers,
Terry
I did the math - I read the books
I kept myself clear - of teachers dirty looks
I formed my answers - that turned out right
From long hard studies - of countless nights
I still haven't found what I need
I played the game - I paid my dues
I kept beliefs that - I wasn't gonna loss
I fed my hunger - to never stop
To fill my ego - and reach the top
I still haven't found what I need
I think I got what I thought I wanted
Time and time again
But I still haven't found what I need
Yeah - I still haven't found what I need
No - I still haven't found what I need
I still haven't found what I need
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Hi SilverBeat,
i love it,the beat comes really easily in the head
and it sings real well.This is the type of song i really like.
I don't know if it needs anymore.A nice guitar bridge and repeat
itself and it's a cool song,
top write,
Tom.
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Good stuff, enjoyed it Mr Siver,
Not having a rhyme with 'need' really made that last line stand out.
As does the title which I incorrectly thought was a spin on U2's classic.
:)
neil
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Hey SilverBeat,
Having listened to your track I think it's very nice. I enjoyed your lyrics which I thought were very clever and the music definetly has a certain beauty to it.
Keep up the good work
Joe
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I think I got what I thought I wanted
I think that's my favourite line in there. Nicely paints a picture of confusion through its grammatical construction.
Bit of constructive feedback though: "I kept beliefs that - I wasn't gonna lose" comes across a bit odd - it's not really several beliefs you're talking about as far as I can see. Maybe something like "I always knew that" instead?
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Clever Lyrics however I think you should expand on it to make it longer. just saying