Hi Josh and welcome to the forum.
As a write this sounds pretty solid musically. Deffinately got s good vibe going with it and the melody sounds good but as for the production you have a lot of issues to deal with here. My suggestions are as follows:
Pull the guitar down and see if you can get a softer sound on it. There is a harshness and brittleness about it that isn't flattering for it. The play sounds pretty good though.
Bring the vox up, it is totally hidden in the mix. It sounds like have a pretty good voice so don't be shy, let us hear it
I detect some clipping. When you record and indeed mix make sure nothing clips, ever, period. No matter where it clips in the chain it will create unwanted and unpleasant distortions. Not the pleasant sort of distortions you get with valves in amps just a nasty sound. I could hear it in a number of places and it sounded like it was connected with the bass too at times. Could be the bass itself or just the total sound level of the combined track when the bass was playing.
I know that mixing is a hard thing to come to terms with when you first start out, there is simply so much to learn and it can take years before it really starts to come together. EQ can be a great friend when solving issues and avoiding clipping. When you record something, even a vocal or a high frequency instrument, you will also be recording stray frequencies right across the spectrum. You don't want these as they are simply chewing up headroom in the mix and not allowing you to push the wanted frequencies of other instruments up to be heard. So eliminate the unrequired frequencies. Usually a shelf will do that for you. eg: With vocals drop in a low shelf to taje away all the sub vocal freq completely. This then helps to create a hole for the bass to come through without any competition. That's just an example as you can, and should, try things like this for all individual tracks.
Hopeing this helps and gets you started in the never ending struggle to get a nice clean mix where everything is heard.
As I said, this sounds like a real good song and the musicianship sounded good but just hard to hear with the mix.
Cant wait to hear some more.
