[Arturo Boyero]

Hi there, fellow forum...ers!

I share with you another song, hope you like it. Please comment, I know it's acapella but anyway I want to know what you think

Here the link

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7j2LyJ_RkY&feature=youtu.be

Here the lyrics

MINIATURE FOREST

I fell
In the miniature forest
Hidden under my skin
Miniature forest shaking
Moving all in between

In this beautiful chaos
Can’t find a place to stay
Beautiful chaos move me
Show me another way

In your eyes i see the extasy
The adventurous desire
Will i ever know the world you see
with a fearless and atempting soul

or will i die alone?
In this hurricane of madness?
In this neverending fall inside a hole that i call home

In the miniature forest
Hidden under my skin
Miniature forest shaking
Moving all in between

In this beautiful chaos
Can’t find a place to stay
Beautiful chaos move me
Show me another way

And when i try to run away
From the bottom
I find another place to fall
Another place to fall

I fall on weeds and leaves
On the softness of the ground
I fall and fall sleep
Hushed by the calm that’s around

It’s so cozy here
I have found a place to live

In the miniature forest
Hidden under my skin
Miniature forest swaing
Calming down every sin

Hearing beautiful noises
Comming from trees that stare
Beautiful noises playing
Singing from everywhere

Miniature forest letting life
Pass like it doesn’t care

It’s so cozy here
It’s so cozy here

[domj]

Ok... the lyrics mean something to me, not quite sure what. Enough though. The melody that you sing it is very scary. Something hooks me to this. I like things broken down to basics and this is as basic as can be.
I wrote something else but i deleted it... because it makes me unsure.
Miniature forest under my skin... fuck! It could be taken literally like capillaries or taken otherwise like the internet and how you are agoraphobic and your world is us(people posting.).
Or is an overall paint stroke not meant to be pinned down.

[nooms]

hi arthur
lyrics intriguing, your voice is good, warm tone and you keep it on track
but that melody gets tedious after a while and it lost me
i appreciate you can hear the band in your head but i cant
need to back it up to get the songs true potential
unless you got any backing singers hidden away in that mexican room ?
all the best,
 nooms

[Arturo Boyero]

hi arthur
lyrics intriguing, your voice is good, warm tone and you keep it on track
but that melody gets tedious after a while and it lost me
i appreciate you can hear the band in your head but i cant
need to back it up to get the songs true potential
unless you got any backing singers hidden away in that mexican room ?
all the best,
 nooms

Yeah... I know I need music! anyway, thanks for listening and the comment!

[Songsmith]

Hi Arturo,
             yeah I liked the lyric & the melody you have put to it but becomes a bit the same of, same of after a bit. Perhaps you have got other ideas in your head for it maybe, it has potential though.

[dankepig]

hello Arturo
There is definitely potential with this. Your voice is good; you have a nice mellow way of singing and good tone. Though singing acapella and staying in key is very difficult, I think you manage it well, almost pitch perfect
I think the melody is good, unique, and has a few nice "hooks", though it gets a little repetitive towards the end.

The lyrics are interesting, "In your eyes i see the extasy, The adventurous desire, Will i ever know the world you see.." i liked those 3 lines a lot. Also i like the theme of a "miniature forest", but overall i think they need just a little more work..

It would be great to hear the music you have in your head along with the voice, but yeah, i say it has potential

Dankepig