[gasspanicc]

My name is Nick, i love music and love to sing. Eventually i want to start a band and do live gigs. Just would like some feedback on some songs,for fun . Thanks. This is song just random really lol.

Mrs Proctor

Kissin and missin Mrs Proctor
She sits and whistles away while i wait for her
She tries to show me the door
But i don;t care anymore
Where are you my love?

Mrs Proctor you make me feel so lonely
Mrs Proctor why do you make me feel blue
Mrs Proctor cant you see there's only time for me and you

Shes missin and kissin everything i do
She just comes at you from every little angle
tiwstin and shoutin
Hey Girl dont be poutin
Because i don't care anymore
Where are you my love?

Mrs Proctor you make me feel so lonely
Mrs Proctor why do you make me feel blue
Mrs Procotr cant you see theres only time for me and you

I miss her, she misses me but i know we cant be freeeee
No we just cant be freeeeeeeeeee
Please leaveeeeeeeeeeee me
Leadin me away in your foolshhhhness

Mrs Proctor you make me feel so lonely
Mrs Proctor why do you make me feel blue
Mrs Proctor cant you see there's only time for me and you

Mrs Proctor you make me feel so lonely
Mrs Proctor why do you make me feel blue
Mrs Proctor cant you see theres only time for me and you

But I dont care anymoreeee
Anyyyyymorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeee
I dont careeeeeeeeeee anymoreeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[PeeJay]

Hi,

This has a fun feel to it even though it's about two people who are apart.

I get the impression of an older woman as in Mrs Robinson. Unless he's just being very formal!

I would maybe change the 'make me feel blue' line in the chorus. That has passed it's prime now.

Nice one,

Phil.

[gasspanicc]

good suggestions, thank you for the response.