[Jack Ryper]

I really enjoyed the melody and the lyrics are definitely intriguing.
Your voice fits really well with the song.
Even though this isn't the kind of music I would usually listen to, I think its an awesome song, good job!

[diademgrove]

Thanks for the comments, really appreciated. The timing in the solo was an accident but it seemed to reflect that moment when you realise there the holiday/night will end so I left it in rather than re-do it.

I'm pleased Chloe liked it, which was the intention.

I've always been close to seagulls, even at Polytechnic so they are just part of my environment. I don't think I could envisage life without them.

Adventures in midi may bring something weird or a pop song, who knows. Life is a bit hectic at the minute and I'm being re-organised at work, oh well.

Neil it was a trip down memory lane, definitely a lament for a lost lullaby. Appealed to my sense of humour.

I'll experiment with my singing, which is still a work in progress.

Thanks again,

Keith

[DevyE]

Hi, It took me a couple of listens to appreciate the song but it's very English and slightly eccentric which appeals to me but you haven't sold Hull as a holiday destination to me with the video 

I like it's originality and a lot of thought obviously went into making it.

And I'm envious that you saw Bowie in the early days.

Nice one

[empyreantic]

I enjoyed it, but it's not a song I would listen to for relaxation or pleasure as I often do. It's a bit too 'out there'; quite psychedelic. It def takes some effort for the listener to enjoy. Like the seagulls.

[Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra]

Firstly I think this is perhaps the most accessible song I've heard of yours Keith. The backing vocals harmonies work well here and are partly responsible for that I think, together with a stronger melody line.

Some good lyric lines as has been noted!

I liked some of the bass in the instrumental break where it features more, especially where it leaps up to some notes but wondered if a simpler, repeated bass motif here under the distorted guitar and echo/delay bits would work better to underpin this section as it doesn't have the vocal lines, to hold the structure together better if you know what I mean. I know that this is a meandering solo bit but I reckon the bass should be a bit more tamed here to balance out the guitar. Just a thought.....

Another thought came to repeat the last 2 lines a few times and go out on an extended fade of that.....

ps. I was a big Bowie fan....who wasn't if they were growing up in that era??

[James Nighthawk]

Others have said trippy. Agreed.

In fact, I would love this to be "Floyd'ed" up. Layers, reverb and chorus heavy vocals disappearing in the background. The instrumentation is right, and some'verbing up hear with judicious delay (as you have played around with already on guitar parts.)

This is really of an age and of a style. But it is very cool for it.

With this kind of track, the production really has to be "right" as without it, too dry, it can loose it's impact. I am listening and enjoying the ride, filling in the sonic changes I would have applied. It's main issue is that without this, people won't "get it"

I hope that follow

I also hear "hypnotic".

Good stuff

JNx

[seriousfun]

I can see where you were heading with this, deffinately got that trippy feel to it, but I found the melody to be very depressing especially when synched to a slow march. Also with slow songs it is very difficult to keep things nice and tight as the slightest variations  give it a loose sound. This had that, though at that same time it gives it a live feel. I think some more reverb and delay on some of the parts could help to cover some of the timing inadequacies if done judiciously and also help to add to the trippy nature of the song.