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Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: moraamarolaloba on April 24, 2022, 06:50:14 PM
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Hola a todos!!!
It seems that the forum is sleeping, maybe it will start to wake up with Spring!
Today I leave this song in which I talk about a ghost. I saw it when I was a girl. He would come out of a room, cross the hall, walk up to where I was, look at me, stay for a while and then disappear into a wall, and I say in because that's what it looked like hahaha
I hope you will be entertained by the song I made about this ghostly experience. I changed microphones and speakers and I think the mix is very balanced.
I hope it entertains you at least.
Stay well
Mora
When I was a child
I used to talk to a ghost
whenI played alone
in my room
with my drawing books
He was dressed in a white sheet
had sad face and sad eyes
and appeared preceeded
by a sudden cold
that made me put on a coat
His name was Todd
I asked him many things
about Heaven and Hell
and where does our soul go
I left Hell in earth
and Heaven in my dreams
he told me
but there are important things
that you have to discover
21 grams is the weight
of the brightness of our eyes
that disappears when we die
our soul splits in two
one is the sou of mind
the other the soul of light
both in different limbos
to become flesh and bones
they need to meet again
through the tunnel of the chance
God hands out some numbers
among the waiting souls
so that they can go out
to find their other half
through the tunnel of chance
there time does not exist
there is only the wait
One day Todd no longer came
I thought he has been reborn
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I just reviewed this one on the other forum, but I have to throw in some more words of enthusiasm. Great story and the last line is brilliant. Your usual high standards Mora. I really enjoyed this. :)
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Congratulations on completing this. It seems like a real labour of love. So much has gone into this - the music, lyrics, the rich production and the psychedelic film to go with it. It's a veritable piece of art.
It sounds to me very spooky, especially the introduction that reminded me of a fairground. I pictured menacing clowns as I listened. The song seems to shift through a number of different moods as it progresses. Each listen reveals further detail.
In my opinion, the following is an absolutely classic line:
"I left hell on earth and heaven in my dreams"
How very profound. I feel this sentiment expresses so much and you sing it so perfectly. It sounds like escapism to me, as though you sometimes prefer fantasy to reality. It's almost morbid in tone and resonates so well with the mood of the song. You seem to feel a strong connection with the 'other side'.
Your voice is amazing. So dark and smouldering. I love that wicked cackle at the end.
A macabre tour de force. Felicidades.
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I just reviewed this one on the other forum, but I have to throw in some more words of enthusiasm. Great story and the last line is brilliant. Your usual high standards Mora. I really enjoyed this. :)
Hola @ChrisPrice (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22723)
Thank you so much, glad you liked it. Stay wellll
Mora
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Hi @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) You never cease to amaze me with your inventiveness and creativity. It does have a ghostly feel to it and feels slightly psychedelic to me. Another wonderful creation :)
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Hi Mora, what an interesting story. And incredible lyrics - I like the way you don’t try to rhyme anything, just tell a story… and throw in some really deep lines about how spirituality might work… wow. And the laugh at the end is great - a little sinister! It made me smile that the ghost is called ‘Todd’, somehow you expect a dramatic exotic name but ‘Todd’ just humanises him. Musically as usual for you it is a great slinky smooth vibe that creates its own atmosphere. Nice work. I’ve never seen a ghost, although I believe in them because so many people I know have… I’ll keep an eye out for Todd.
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Congratulations on completing this. It seems like a real labour of love. So much has gone into this - the music, lyrics, the rich production and the psychedelic film to go with it. It's a veritable piece of art.
It sounds to me very spooky, especially the introduction that reminded me of a fairground. I pictured menacing clowns as I listened. The song seems to shift through a number of different moods as it progresses. Each listen reveals further detail.
In my opinion, the following is an absolutely classic line:
"I left hell on earth and heaven in my dreams"
How very profound. I feel this sentiment expresses so much and you sing it so perfectly. It sounds like escapism to me, as though you sometimes prefer fantasy to reality. It's almost morbid in tone and resonates so well with the mood of the song. You seem to feel a strong connection with the 'other side'.
Your voice is amazing. So dark and smouldering. I love that wicked cackle at the end.
A macabre tour de force. Felicidades.
Thank you very much, you are very kind, I think you have heard and seen the video from many points of view and that makes me happy.
I think that my songs are stories more than songs, generally dark, because I like that color.
Stay well
Mora
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Hi @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) You never cease to amaze me with your inventiveness and creativity. It does have a ghostly feel to it and feels slightly psychedelic to me. Another wonderful creation :)
Hola @pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269)
Glad to read from you! Thank you so much! I hope you are ok.
Mora
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@moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233)
Hi Mora, another "Mora" art installation! I particularly loved the lyric, I rarely think about lyrics but this one really made me think. Brilliant!. The only thing missing was one of Marcus's guitar cameos! ;)
Excellent
Jamie
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Hi Mora, what an interesting story. And incredible lyrics - I like the way you don’t try to rhyme anything, just tell a story… and throw in some really deep lines about how spirituality might work… wow. And the laugh at the end is great - a little sinister! It made me smile that the ghost is called ‘Todd’, somehow you expect a dramatic exotic name but ‘Todd’ just humanises him. Musically as usual for you it is a great slinky smooth vibe that creates its own atmosphere. Nice work. I’ve never seen a ghost, although I believe in them because so many people I know have… I’ll keep an eye out for Todd.
Hola @PaulyX (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21034)
Thank you!!!
Ghosts...Personally I don't believe in the drama with which the presence of a ghost is usually surrounded, they are things that happen...sometimes they are helpful but usually they pass by, they don't see you, it's like life, a street full of everything.
Stay well
Mora
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@moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233)
Hi Mora, another "Mora" art installation! I particularly loved the lyric, I rarely think about lyrics but this one really made me think. Brilliant!. The only thing missing was one of Marcus's guitar cameos! ;)
Excellent
Jamie
Hola @Jamie (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19125)
Thank you!!!Yes, this time Marcus completed the music with chords and arpeggios with wa wa very amorphous!!!
I wish you a nice weekend !
Mora
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Yo Mora.
This is quite a trippy one.
I tend to listen to your music without the video,mostly because my tiny brain can only process one at a time!
Definitely a track to let go and let it wash over me. 8)
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Yo Mora.
This is quite a trippy one.
I tend to listen to your music without the video,mostly because my tiny brain can only process one at a time!
Definitely a track to let go and let it wash over me. 8)
hahaha Thabk you so much, glad you enjoyed the trip!
Stay well
Mora
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Great lyrics that tell a wonderful story. The arrangement and video are very strong, too, and I think the integration of all three is key to what you do. It's very unique (which is an excellent thing) and something we need more of. I worry the visuals and arrangement could take away from the lyrics, but probably not. I'm feeling haunted now, in a good way.
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Great lyrics that tell a wonderful story. The arrangement and video are very strong, too, and I think the integration of all three is key to what you do. It's very unique (which is an excellent thing) and something we need more of. I worry the visuals and arrangement could take away from the lyrics, but probably not. I'm feeling haunted now, in a good way.
Hola @delb0y (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20401)
Thank you!!
I understand what you are saying, the images and music surround the words and these can be diluted by so much interaction, I force myself to close my eyes to listen to my work when I have it assembled, it is a different and effective experience, of course, yes, but later, when I look at the set I enjoy it more.
Stay well
Mora
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I loved this @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) - such amazing imagery and normalising the ghost with such a regular name was an interesting move... Lyrics I LOVED! and the whole thing really.. such atmospherics and such a fantastic story! You are a star, Mora!
K
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I loved this @moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) - such amazing imagery and normalising the ghost with such a regular name was an interesting move... Lyrics I LOVED! and the whole thing really.. such atmospherics and such a fantastic story! You are a star, Mora!
K
Hola @MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820)
Glad you liked it! Thank you, I think the story is funny like this!!
Stay well
Mora
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Another beautiful and very musical melody. Wonderful mysterious atmosphere and vocals. So interesting arrangement!
The combination of the some orchestral instruments with modern sounds. You have a lot of original music ideas!
The sound and the recording quality is excellent.
As always, I love the range of the colors you used in the video. Original and beautiful combinations which fill the melody. It's the sound of melody and colors!
Maya
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Another beautiful and very musical melody. Wonderful mysterious atmosphere and vocals. So interesting arrangement!
The combination of the some orchestral instruments with modern sounds. You have a lot of original music ideas!
The sound and the recording quality is excellent.
As always, I love the range of the colors you used in the video. Original and beautiful combinations which fill the melody. It's the sound of melody and colors!
Maya
Thank you @Maya Clars (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22624)
I really appreciate your words, so nice always!
Big kiss
Mora