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Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Works in Progress => Topic started by: Paulski on September 28, 2017, 01:13:59 PM

Title: Hello Piano - WIP
Post by: Paulski on September 28, 2017, 01:13:59 PM

Working on this ballad. I'm thinking of adding bass, a few harmonies, elect guitar?, and some more strings. I'm trying these days to find chord progressions that give the chorus a lift so, in this one, the verse is in G and the chorus in E. Does it work? I mean are the transitions between the sections smooth enough? Any suggestions on what other instruments it needs? Or should I just make t piano and vocals? Or trash it all and start again?  ;D ;D

Thanks in advance for any input..  ;D

https://soundcloud.com/paulcanuck/hello-piano/s-6XTNJ

Title: Re: Hello Piano - WIP
Post by: Almosthumanrobot on October 01, 2017, 03:14:41 PM

Wow, that chorus transition is amazing! The chorus itself is really nice too.

As for the feedback you asked for, I'd change the composition in the following ways:
I'd wait with adding the drum track untill the start of the chorus, then continue to use it throughout the rest of the song. I feel it takes away from the build up now. I would also add a base during the chorusses, and indeed add some more strings.
I wouldn't add an electric guitar, you're singing to the piano, not to the guitar  ;)

Other than that it really works man, you've got a great voice!

Title: Re: Hello Piano - WIP
Post by: Paulski on October 02, 2017, 12:59:26 PM

Thanks Almosthumanrobot. Appreciate the kind words  ;D
Yes always a challenge as to when (or whether) to start drums in a piano song.
I have uploaded a new version - now has some harmonies, bass and guitars.
Maybe you're right about the guitars - we'll see what other think.
Lots more tweaking to do but hopefully getting near the end..

Paul

Title: Re: Hello Piano - WIP
Post by: Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra on October 02, 2017, 05:03:18 PM

Yes the chorus works very well.

Drums don't seem inappropriate for the song but I'm not mad about the snare sound....it doesn't seem right for the song for me. Guitar is fine.

Otherwise everything sounds good.

Title: Re: Hello Piano - WIP
Post by: Paulski on October 06, 2017, 07:28:52 PM

Quote from: Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra on October 02, 2017, 05:03:18 PM

Yes the chorus works very well.

Drums don't seem inappropriate for the song but I'm not mad about the snare sound....it doesn't seem right for the song for me. Guitar is fine.

Otherwise everything sounds good.

Thanks Viscount Yes you're right it needs a deeper snare I think - this one is too IDK "cracky" :) It took a while to get my head around that key change in the chorus so lost sight of what it would be like for first time listeners - now I know - whew!

Title: Re: Hello Piano - WIP
Post by: Paulski on October 06, 2017, 07:30:14 PM

Thanks all - locking this thread as it is now in finished songs (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?topic=13852.0).