[tina m]

the more i  listen to your stuff andrew the more i realise i just write pop tunes whereas you write proper songs & they are consistently great work
i loved the acoustic lead guitar  was that paul tho?
some of the low notes sounded just a bit to low for you but still a great vocal i was trying to think of who your voice reminded me of & its that 80s group hue & cry....they might even be from your part of the country?
anyway another great song for your debut album

[nooms]

lot of passion in there kaf
and the lyric reminds me of billy joel, the approach

not keen on the low voice intro and youve done that before..
but when you open up you fly

,

[jmacdon]

Fantastic.    This is a very personal and emotional song - one can read and interpret the lyrics in many ways, but something about these lyrics shows pure emotion.   And that is the recipe for a great song.  I actually like the title - it's similar to my own song about the Taliban - the title doesn't actually need to represent the song as a whole - it's a snippet of the song.  And here you capture it well. 

I absolutely love the guitar that kicks in at 1.00 - this really does add emotion and professionalism to the song.  Dare I say, it almost brought a tear.......

I prefer you to throw your vocal around - the deep, low voice is good for a demo, but forget it for a production track.  You sing best when you can let rip the high notes.    A great track Kaf.  Well done :-)

[tone]

This is a lovely bit of songwriting, and a high standard of production as I've come to expect from TAFKAP (The artist formerly known as Pablo)

The lyrics are very well thought-out and moving. But I'm not sure the octave swap in the verses is the way to go with this song, despite being a good idea and an interesting way to add interest to the song.

(slight deviation here: Neil Finn does a similar thing in Distant Sun (crowded house) but it only sounds like an octave jump. The top melody is actually different from the bottom one, and they combine to make a single melody.)

I actually think the song would be better if you pitched it halfway between the two extremes and sang is straight. Partly because I think you'd be able to deliver a more delicate and nuanced vocal performance in a more comfortable part of your range, and because that more comfortable vocal range would probably relax your phrasing enough to bring enough variation in the delivery to hold interest.

But it's an arrangement detail. The songwriting is spot on here Kafla and that lyric about dryness in your mouth is perfect. You've got the bulk of a great album written by my reckoning.

[Kafla]

Thanks for all your comments and reviews forumees

I must say it amazes me the compliments I get when I look around this forum and witness the stunning talent and technical knowledge

Songwriting amazes me as well - this is one of the simplest songs I have ever written, aside from the mid 8 its basically G Em D C, Its quite a simple melody as well but there have been some very positive comments about it

Thanks everyone