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Songwriter Forum => Lyrics => Topic started by: Katie Wilson on April 13, 2018, 03:59:50 PM

Title: Room
Post by: Katie Wilson on April 13, 2018, 03:59:50 PM

I didn't know what to write so I thought I'd just write about my room where I am now

I wanted to try and be as descriptive as possible

Room

there's a wardrobe by the door
with some boxes on the top
with airfix models unmade
one's the cutty sark , the other-  a London bus

I'm trying to paint a picture
of the room that is my world

there's my paintings on the wall
one is Liam the other Noel
my guitar is at an angle
It's leans against the chest of drawers

I'm trying to paint a picture
of the room that is my world

underneath my book case
which is full of books on art
lays my very old blue Hoover
which doesn't always start

I'm trying to paint a picture
of the room that is my world

on my bed there's a patchwork
which is woollen and quite old
and my curtains are red roses
and my lampshade nearly gold

I'm trying to paint a picture
of the room that is my world

Title: Re: Room
Post by: Wicked Deeds on April 13, 2018, 04:07:19 PM

I like it Katie.  Though it's not the kind of lyric to invite the reader into a story, it has enough description to invote us to read between the lines and to imagine the greater detail of your life. Our conclusions may be accurate or inaccurate but still, what you have written engages the reader to imagine. This reads very well indeed and I dare say, you could weave a story in to the description of your room represented by the lyrics.

Wicked.

Title: Re: Room
Post by: Sterix on April 13, 2018, 07:12:14 PM

Unusual subject.  ;D

I like the chorus especially. It certainly does paint a picture.

Title: Re: Room
Post by: Oldbutyet on April 13, 2018, 10:23:07 PM

Hi Katie there are certain lines that to me give great imagery of art, for me to try and explain i'm going to start at your last verse.

on my bed there's a patchwork
which is woollen and quite old
and my curtains are red roses
and my lampshade nearly gold

Each line gives the imagery of art form now your third verse.

underneath my book case
which is full of books on art
lays my very old blue Hoover
which doesn't always start

Now your first verse.

there's a wardrobe by the door
with some boxes on the top
with airfix models unmade
one's the cutty sark , the other-  a London bus

Get the imagery on your fingers   8)