I'm not going to talk about the production, because that's not my area. Except to say, there's a lot of yelling....
I'm interested in the lyric, though.
You say the song is about a "twisted girl". When I read it--and even more so when I listen to it--I get the impression it's about a disgruntled guy who's pretty bent out of shape because his love interest is only hanging onto him until she finds something better. Apparently, she's very needy and can't stand the thought of being alone, so, he's a constant, but she keeps going through one guy after another, looking for a better one, while the disgruntled guy keeps warning them they're only temporary. But is that true, or is he just trying to scare them away so he can keep her for himself?
You have some clever lines (in my opinion, anyway). Like, referring to her as having "two barrels"--one reserved for you and the other for exploring other possibilities. And, like a song, she'll be the best three minutes....
Some of it I don't get. Like the knot in her spine tangling somebody up. And the "sharpen your teeth" ??
In one instance the song contradicts itself. It says, "she knows exactly what she wants" but later it says, "she doesn't know who she wants to grow old with".
Some of the lyric seems a little weak, such as "she will not be pleased", "she doesn't know who she wants to grow old with". I think it might be that it's a little too wordy. Maybe??
I'm usually not a fan of calling adults "girls" and "boys", although it isn't as bad if you're consistent, like in this song. Plus, in this case, I take it as indicating neither of them is really grown up yet, even though they're adults in age.
Last nit--I really cringe when I see/hear misogynistic lines like "she's just waiting for a boy to come take control".
I think this lyric has potential and just needs to be strengthened and tightened. Hopefully, someone else will have some good comments for you on the production.
Vicki
