The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: pompeyjazz on June 15, 2018, 06:32:01 PM
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Sorry, not been around the forum too much recently. Life has got in the way a bit. I must catch up with some reviews over the weekend.
A few weeks ago at a music festival locally, a young guy and girl (18 and 20) died after taking "dodgy" ecstasy tablets. 15 others were admitted to hospital and thankfully recovered. Undoubtedly, some unscrupulous low life has benefited financially from all of this. It's just so sad for the families to lose people these age.
Anyway, this song is about that...
Little Pills
Little pills designed to give you thrills
Pulsing through you veins to their final destination
This one brings you up, the other brings you down
Playing little games
Messing your metabolism
And the just ain't nothing, you just need something for the pain
Another dose will bring you real close to the end
Maybe you know, all there is to know
But the demon's winning, it's sowed it's seed in you brain
Little pills, designed to make you high
Line the pockets of an obscene wealthy guy
Profit from the batch
Cut the pills with crap
Feed it to the masses
Never mind the consequences
And the just ain't nothing, you just need something for the pain
Another dose will bring you real close to the end
Maybe you know, all there is to know
But the demon's winning, it's sowed it's seed in you brain
(c) Bradley - 2018
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Good song John.
Nice chord progs and vox - sounds very beatley to me in places - a good thing in my manuals.
Very creative piece even if it is a sad story. :(
Paul
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Hi Pompey,
I heard about this story on the news, WTF were the kids thinking, It always amazes me how people think that, swallowing something that some scroaty little S**t has given you at a festival is somehow going to end well.
Anyway, reading through the lyrics....clever words.
Track sounded a bit Floydy to me but I haven't listened to much of that, only what Mikey has introduced me to.
Liked it.
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Hi John, very interesting instrumentation/arrangement liked it! You were channeling early Lennon again with your vocals with touches of ELO playing along. All good!
Nice one!
Cheers
Jamie
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Hey man I heard about this on the news, what a shame. First of all I like the song, nice chilled out vibe love the vocals give it an edgy feel.
I really appreciate that you’re trying to do something nice for the victims but in my opinion the lyrics in the chorus are a bit distasteful. I say this because you mentioned that the song is about the event specifically and in the chorus the phrase “another dose” paints the victims as regular users with a real drug problem and unless you know more about the incident than I do (if that is the case my comment is here redundant and I apologise) I don’t really think that’s very fair.
all in all good song just not sure about some of the lyrics given the circumstances.
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Good work as usual and good to see a song on a different subject, albeit a sad one.
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Yo pomps.
This is a real grower for me. Undeniably psychedelic in a Beatles/Lennon way and fair comment on a tragically all too common occurrence.
A well crafted piece,John. 8)
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@Jack_Diamond. (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22077)
I really appreciate that you’re trying to do something nice for the victims but in my opinion the lyrics in the chorus are a bit distasteful. I say this because you mentioned that the song is about the event specifically and in the chorus the phrase “another dose” paints the victims as regular users with a real drug problem and unless you know more about the incident than I do (if that is the case my comment is here redundant and I apologise) I don’t really think that’s very fair.
Jack, the very last thing that I'm trying to do is to be disrespectful to the victims of this awful incident. I'm really trying to highlight the evil caused by the sort of people who are peddling these "altered" substances. The song is not about the specific event, it's an overall comment on this type of thing. Of course, lyrics are all about interpretation but I'm not trying to paint victims as regular users, just trying to highlight the fact that some low life don't give a s**t about the fact that they've put this dodgy stuff out there
Cheers
John
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Very clever song John.
Real echoes of The Beatles with a hint of Bowie.
Great lyrics with good sentiments.
A good listen.
Sandeep
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@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) I didn't mean to imply that you were meaning to try to do this. It's just how it sounded to me. You did say the song is about that incident specifically so surely you can see why i thought this? I dont mean any offence i do think the song is great.
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Hi Pompey. This song despite a modest start (the first 25 seconds) builds really well. lyrics are hard hitting and hit the spot for me. Really like the organ accompanyment. after such a prolific run yiu can be forgiven for slowing a bit on the forum btw! Im only dipping in myself presently because of the world cup. Nice work once again. Micky
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Nice one Pomps, like others have said I got a strong mid-tempo Lennon vibe from it. Poignant message too.
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John,
Like this a lot, fine lyrics and intelligent use of chords and sympathetic arrangement. Wondered how you'd rhyme with metabolism, easy dont :-)
The bv's top it off really well.
:)
neil