Okay.... now that the drama has died down, ABOUT YOUR LYRIC.
I liked what you wrote. It actually is too complex for a song, but that doesn't mean a song could not come from it.
A lot of your lines are begging for music. Not all of them, but a lot of them. If I were to take it upon myself to add music and had carte blanche to do so, I'd be doing a lot of "addition by subtraction" to get to a lyric that the average person could identify with.
Of course, if your audience is "exceptional educated people only" then it's just fine the way it is. . . but that's a pretty small audience.
I am NOT volunteering to add music to this. But I am absolutely convinced that there IS a song in this poem. A very good song. It's just a matter of digging it out.