The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: pompeyjazz on September 18, 2018, 03:03:37 PM
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Time to get my entry dusted down and submitted.
It's a little ditty about fruit ;D
Oranges
Oranges, Oranges, Oranges are not the only fruit
Oranges, Oranges, Oranges are not the only fruit
I'm eating fruit until my skin turns red
I've got some pomegranates stashed beneath my bed
Oranges, Oranges, Oranges are not the only fruit
Oranges, Oranges, Oranges are not the only fruit
I need a smoothie to retain my karma
All I need to add is a juicy banana
Oranges, Oranges, Oranges are not the only fruit
Oranges, Oranges, Oranges are not the only fruit
Oranges are not the only fruit
(c) Bradley 2018
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Nice work, a real fruity little number. Especially love the bridge section "I'm eating fruit until my skin turns red". It contrasts with the opening really nicely but doesn't let up at all.
Do you really have pomegranates stashed under you bed? Very odd boy :)
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Made me smile - loads of humour and a great sound....put me in mind of Jilted John
Have you approached the Orange Markerting Board. ;D ;D ;D
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John,
Lots to like here.
Sweet and delicious
Housemartins??
Juicy
:)
neil
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Whato Pomegranate Jazz
Great tune, lovely production, such a happy song, I love the anti establishment, anti GDPR (Grapes & Damsons Production Regulation) bare faced anarchic punk-esque vibe, there's blood-orange juice on the dance floor with this.
But honestly, a super song, and makes me (and many others) smile.
I don't know how you think of them, but keep em coming.
Rich
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Okay, yes, that's definitely my type. A worthy contender for sure. I love it. No nits at all. Love it!
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Love this - could really hear it as your band's show opener to get the public going.
A bit of an English pub song feel to it which is infectious.
Maybe the vocal in the verses (?) could come up or forward a bit for clarity, but super grape-stomping stuff!
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How can you manage to get THREE choruses in?! Superb stuff John, and a little bit of light relief...I can hear a touch of Madness in there (or perhaps madness 😉). A bit disappointed you didn’t get a mention of my favourite pineapple in there, but I’ll let you off.
Beautiful production, great fun.
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Lovely number. I'm partial to a banana myself.
Good work :)
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Punky nuttiness, a really infectious, fun number. SHame it is only 1 minute long as you could have gone on to tell us about other fruits we should know about! :D
Still, I very much enjoyed entertaining and energetic number, just perfect with my banana!
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Oranges! Oranges! Very infectious melody which you can't unhear. The best song about Oranges since Barratt. Great work Pompey
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Worth it for this couplet alone:
"I need a smoothie to retain my karma
All I need to add is a juicy banana"
Made my day.
M
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Cracking stuff John!
Gets you right from the off and don't let go.
Doesn't outstay its time or even seem that short really....transcends time! One big hookline you got there....like the way you sang it up at the end....good one!
Great sound too!
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Yo pomps.
Love this. It's like a ska celebration,a party in musical form.
That's some halo in the pic! :D
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It's an orange shaped seat cushion from Lidl. Either that or an apparition ;D
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Yo John
Three choruses in this - how'd you manage that?
Really liked the energy in this one.
Good vox, harms, guitar, arrangement - has it all.
nothing rhymes with oranges yet you say F Scott Fitzgerald that and use it anyway. ;D ;D
Great entry in the race ;D
Paul
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real catchy john
like the sound/feel your getting and smiling lyric
this could be a single .
has a kind of the edwyn collins/strummer thing about it ..
mind you that might be the orange juice connection
fine work
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WOW< John, that was so much fun to listen to ;D This comp has brought out some very unusual creations, with rock'n tracks about oranges and fruit,
and an another one about hoeing and sweating in a garden :D How cool is that 8)
This one has a bit of a ska feel to me, especially in the verses, and of course the subject matter, which I love :-*
So creative and so well executed :) Great entry!
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A huge thank you to all my fruit loving friends out there :)
All feedback is really appreciated
Thanks
John
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Haha, this was great. I loved it. Could go on a playlist with that Kinks song about mashed potatoes, and the vegetable song by the Beach Boys. We'd have a vegetarian meal. Really delightful song. Made me laugh.
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Your songs and your spirit always put me in a good mood. Maybe I'll make a song about apples...