The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Lyrics => Topic started by: EmmanuelT on November 16, 2017, 09:21:51 PM
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Here's a simple lyric I wrote! What do you guys think???? :)
I imagine it going with a heartfelt country song.
''My New Leather Shoes''
I wonder what you'd think if you saw me in my new leather shoes?
Would you recognize me
Or see another?
I wonder what you'd say if you saw me in my new leather shoes?
"Have you grown
Or does those heels make you taller?"
I wonder how you'd act if you saw me in my new leather shoes?
Would you dance a last waltz with me in the moonlight hour?
Darling, I could polish my shoes all I want
But my feet would still look the same
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Not really enough content to comment on!!
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Howdy,
Kicks off well, and i was just getting into the flow, when BOOM! it disappeared in a cloud of smoke. Could be something good with another verse or two my friend, just ends too abruptly.
Vintage54
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I like the structure of this song, question and answer- couldn't be clearer
I'm a bit missing the part where shoes become some defining character while there are other parts of you that are still showing
on another hand - I'm not a good example, just looked at my shoes and apparently, there are orange stripes on them which I never noticed. I wear them daily for quite a while.