[Wolfini]

Hello everybody!

Now, please don't get fooled by the songpic - this is not a Christmas song! Well, not really, though there are some bell sounds in it, and it is about light and shadows...

Ok, back to business. This is the second song in my "Happy acoustic songs" project. It is not all that happy this time, more ambiguous, but I tried to give it a positive twist in the end.

I am interested to hear what you think about this one, so feel free to post any thought that might come to mind.

Light and shadow

there's a light that is shining in my window
there's a light and it's glowing all night long
there's a shadow that is lurking in the corner
there's a shadow waiting for me to go wrong

and in between there's a thousand shades of doubt
in the basement of my mind

there's a light growing brighter by the minute
there's a light and it's burning true and strong
there's a shadow pointing at me from the light pole
there's a shadow and it's trying to hold on

and in between there's a thousand shades of pain
in the darkness of my mind

I need a candle to guide me
I need a torch to look into the corners of my mind

there's a light softly brightening my edges
there's a light that is warming from inside
there's a shadow reaching into nooks and crannies
there's a shadow searching for a place to hide

and in between there's a thousand shades of happy
in the reaches of my mind

I found a candle to guide me
I found a torch to look into the corners of my mind

Bye Wolfi

[pompeyjazz]

Hi Wolfi,

I like this. Very good chord progression. It takes me a while to get into your voice but I really like it. You've obviously thought quite a bit about this work. I like the addition of the strings and the whole build of the song.

Nice work

John

[shadowfax]

Good lyrics and song mood, vocal is an acquired taste I think..

best, Kevin

[Jamie]

Hi, liked the chord progression and it was nicely played. The lyric didn't chime for me, but I'm not really a lyric person . The vocal was tending towards Bob Dylan, who I don't get along with.
Nice one.
Cheers
Jamie

[Wolfini]

Thanks a lot guys! Hm, yes, I got the Dylan comparison before, and I am not too fond of him as a singer either (love him as songwriter of course!). But it is the voice I have got and have to work with, I am afraid.... Or maybe if I tried to move out of my vocal comfort zone and into higher registers? But then soon everything sounds forced and unnatural.     

Bye Wolfi

[digger72]

Hi Wolfini,

Some nice movements within the song. When it started I initially thought "In My Life" by the Beatles, then I got hints of James Bond in there, but they both moved off in different directions and kept the song interesting.
As you say, with the vocals you can only use what you have, unless you recruit somebody. Not my particular taste either, but only because of the Dylan-like quality. Thought the melody was fine.

Digger

[olivergearing]

Hey Wolfini

The guitars sound really great, and the melody fits nicely with it during the verse. The minor transition halfway through the verse provides good variety.

For me the chorus doesn't quite back up the strength of the verse, but that's not always a bad thing... Plenty of hits have stronger verses...

The build of the song works well to, although it did feel like an abrupt ending?

Cheers

[hardtwistmusic]

My one tiny nit is that I'd like to have heard a little more bass in the mix.  Based on my "ear for music" I wanted something to balance out the "jangle" of the higher stuff.  Not to change anything that's there, just to do a few lines intermixed with something an octave (or even two) lower in addition to balance up. 

And don't trust my "ear for music."  I don't.  But if you can hear it yourself, try it. 

[lennystone]

The first few seconds definitely reminded me of the intro of In My Life, I really liked the song. Sounded sentimental and your voice has a lot of soul in it.  It's like a story in itself. I didn't feel like the bells really flowed with the song that well, but everything else sounded great to me!

[ShinyThang]

Good stuff. For a second there I thought we were getting a Beatles cover - 'All my Life' but then the chord prog went off in an unexpected direction. Then it did it again!

Excellent performance and a good build. The strings work particularly well. When they first appeared I wasn't sure if they were there or not. I like how they thicken the sound without being too prominent. Unfortunately for me the build comes to nothing when I thought we were heading somewhere other than the end. Not for me the nasal-y vocal style either but those things are simply preference.

Lyrically I have to say I don't really get it. I see that it is focussed and constant, building just like the music but, for this bear-of-little-brain it seemed too much to figure out. Enjoyed the listen though and I think the guitar work is very good indeed.

... just read your own comments about the 'voice you have to work with' ... If you'd prefer to sing differently you could do a lot worse than invest in some vocal coaching. It is clear that you can sing so I reckon a few sessions will help you to open it up.

[giitlesriddles]

It's definitely not for everyone, but I'm sure most people can appreciate the artistry and talent present in this recording.
Happy Holidays!
~Nate

[Viscount Cramer & His Orchestra]

Your voice does take a bit of getting used to - sorry. Doesn't make me think of Dylan though.

The verses are the best bit for me. That interesting James Bond chord change works surprisingly well and the melody's at its best here I think.

When it goes into that 'and in between' section, something late 60s came into my head but I couldn't quite get a hold of it. May be it was that last line there too - the way it resolves on 'mind'....no can't think of it. It's effective though.

The other bit 'candle to guide me' didn't work well for me.

Nice sound - guitar is especially nice.

[Wolfini]

Thanks everyone about the valuable feedback!

@digger: I did not think about "in my life", but there is definitely that James Bond moment in there. ;-)

@oliver: I used to do the straight verse - chorus thing a lot, but lately I tried to have less obvious structures. So yes, the chorus is not really a chorus, neither is the bridge. And yes, I did not really know where to take the song in the end, but since the idea of my project is to make happy lyrics with sad melodies I hoped a dissolvement into the major chord at the end would work out.

@hardtwistmusic: I tried to add low end by the bass track and a synth track, and the cajon is also quite bassy once it sets in. I had unknowingly a bass boosting effect on when I set the mic for recording the guitar, so the guitar track was really rather jangly and high this time - your impression is right on spot here! But I will see if maybe the bass needs a little extra boost or some eq to fill the spectrum more.

@lennystone: thanks a lot for your kind and positive words, even on the vocals. ;-) Yes, there are some disharmonies with the bells, but I kind of like them for adding some tension to the oh-so-sweet strings.

@shiny-thang: Good to hear you liked the strings, I was not totally sure if they work out fine. There is no deepar meaning to the lyrics, it is just about the internal struggle between happier and sad feelings. Yes, vocal coaching would be a great thing, and I have been thinking about it for some time. I did a week-end workshop once, which I think helped me some, but of course cannot substitute full vocal education. I would have to find the time (and money) though, which is not so easy with job and familly life going on. But thanks for the encouragement! You are right about the nasal problem, which I should perhaps better look out for.

And probably my accent when singing in English might also have an irritating effect for native speakers?

@gittlesriddles: well, as long as it is interesting for some people I am happy.

@viscountcramer: I think I am generally quite influenced by 60ies music, which is what  I listened to mostly when I was young (in the 80ies and 90ies though... ;-) ), so I am not surprised when you hear that here. Yes, James Bond - I also like that part. The "candle" part was added as an afterthought in songwriting, since I felt I needed more variation than just the verse and quite short chorus. Unusually for me this song developed over a few weeks, and not everything seemed to flow naturally. I just love that guitar for its sound, it's a Yamaha A3M.

Thanks again, Bye Wolfi

[Frenchy]

Hi Wolfini,

Relly enjoyed this, firstly the recording is accomplished, I enjoyed the warm sound on the accoustic guitars and the space around your voice which allowed the song to breathe. The lyrics are good and the theme too, if I could suggest an improvement it would be the structure of the phrasing and the top line melody. I would shift the accent around a bit to give it a more ebb and flow building and releasing tension if you get what I mean.

good work !

Regards,
Frenchy

[PaulAds]

Nice work, Wolfi...

Guitars sound lovely and a few nice chord changes keep things moving along nicely...I thought it might have kicked off a bit more...I felt like it was building up to something, but backed off again...

Strings are very nice. I'd personally like to have heard some drums kick in there at some point...to kick it down the road...but I always enjoy a bit of a racket!

Oh, and I thought the lone cymbal at the end could be done away with

Enjoyed it and listened twice straight off.