The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: pompeyjazz on April 21, 2024, 01:17:50 PM
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Hi All, long time no post from me. I guess I got kinda disillusioned with the forum. A lot of the guys who used to be on here when it used to be pretty vibrant place don't post any more. I guess things change but it's a shame not to see them around here.
I'm still writing at my usual pace and trying to explore different genres and musical ideas. This is something that has just been completed. I'm trying to brush up on some production techniques before starting my University course in September so there are a few experimental ideas in this track - Hope you enjoy the listen
Lost In Space
Ch
Lost in space
Disappeared without a trace
Lost in time
Thought I was losing my mind
Lost and found
Underground or overground
Communication
Routed to another destination
V1
I'm speeding away from earth
Spinning in circles, slowly, slowly
Ch
V2
I'll never see another face
Cut the ignition – throws me, throws me
Breakdown
Final Ch
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You are pushing your boundaries.
And you’ve not started the uni course!?
I'm surprised you're not teaching there.
September is months away!
Yes, the forum has changed. Was it the scamdemic?
I like the song
The backing vocals are unusual.
Is there a reverse reverb in there?
Keep em coming John.
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Morning John @pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269)
The production on this is up to your usual high standards.
I listened to it twice. The first time without reading the lyrics and my first impressions was that it is a good song, but would benefit from a strong chorus.
I listened again, this time reading the lyrics and noted that what I assumed to be the verse, you refer to as the chorus and what I thought was the bridge was in fact the verse.
To me, this could be. elevated into a truly great song if you halved what you call the chorus sections and then after what you call the verse sections, go into a big melodic chorus :)
Just my opinion!!!
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Thanks @rightly (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20219) Yep - I reversed the vocals in the bridge section and then used a LFO EQ on the guitars in that section too !
@Nick Ryder (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=23004) Thanks so much Nick - Comments noted :)
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Great production, quite dreamy, good vocals but for me, maybe a bit too prominent.
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Yeah, I've had one or two moments when I've got a bit brasssed off with the forums but, in my case at least, they are a bit of a life line..a way of getting my stuff heard and checking out others, so I'm sticking around. I digress..I'm really liking this one John. There's an almost psychedelic vibe to some of this which always works for me. It sounds very polished to me. Your vocals are really strong and it's a memorable track. Love it! :)
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@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) – interesting structure with the long chorus and the short verses, good to shake it up. I really like the breakdown section – some interesting things going on – reverse vocal? I wouldn’t even know how to do that.. Intriguing. Lovely vibe to the whole thing – love the slow meter / lyrical delivery, adds to the mood of the whole thing. Delighted to see you posting again :)
K
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Hey man very original all the way around , Cool vocals and a lot of tidy little nuances to bring it all together .
I really enjoyed this !!
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Hi
Really enjoyed this song .. the beat is like a ticking time bomb
the massive reverb on the vocals is justified in the genre of the song
i got a touch of Duran Duran on the vocals
all in all a great song & mix
subvibe
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@calafinestrat (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=23038) Thanks so much for your listen and observations. Much appreciated
@ChrisPrice (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22723) Hear what you're saying about getting your music out there Chris - I was aiming for a slightly psychedelic feel so glad that worked !
@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820) Thanks Karen - You know how I like to shake it up a bit with conventional / unconventional. Glad you enjoyed the listen
@Elvis Nash (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22812) Hey thanks man - Really appreciate the feedback
@subvibe (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22847) Thank you - Duran Duran eh ? I guess they are of my era so maybe there's some influence there. Thanks for the listen
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Hola @pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269)
I hadn't heard your song, I thought I had!!! Pedona, I think you already know that I am clueless.
I love the intro and the atmosphere that you have created here, I think it is one of your best songs, music, arrangement, vocals, guitar, lyrics, and that bass that I love as well as the subtle synths that appear here and there giving a floating sensation.
Very good work, that tempo gives a special weight to the words.
Disillusioned with the forum? Maybe we are all hahaha
Strange moments right? The world shakes off its fleas and throws us against the glass of our frustrations and hopes...
But here you are, with a great song so please, keep giving us your fruit.
I repeat that it is a great song!!! Good weekend
PS
Do you know something? Lately I see the forum as a place that has closed because it's already night but suddenly, a bus full of tourists who haven't changed the time arrives and fills it up!!! hahaha. Then, of course, their get back on their bus. 8)
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Good stuff! What course are you going to be doing? Really like the echoey vocals on this - there's something about your vocal tone that often makes me thing of John Lennon when he sings in a more rocky style. Backwards guitar and vocals during the breakdown section were cool!
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@moraamarolaloba (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21233) Thanks Mora - I like your comparison about the bus station !! Don't worry, there's plenty of music to come from me :)
@The Holographic Rodeo (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=22741) Thanks so much - I'm going to be doing a degree in Music Technology starting in September but will be a very, very mature student :)