[Sellon]

Sometimes I feel like I'm just waiting to die
Things get worse and worse every day
I'm still going to a psych hospital...
my head just ain't the same since she left...
here's how its been.


I wake up to the same ceiling every day
Sometimes I wish that everything would just float away
I look out to the world as I lean on my window frame
Thinking that someone must feel the same
And as my wall cracks even more
The cracks now stretching to the door
I realize that it's just not worth it now
Cause I will always be this way
I will always watch paint peel from my ceiling
Because it knows exactly how I'm feeling
Slowly fading away
nothing will ever change
It'll always be the same...

So i'll stand up, rise once more
But like always my feelings will bring me back down to the floor
I hope no one has to feel like this
I hope no one ever has to go through what I've been through
A life of bitterness with nothing but feeling empty
I've grown out of hate, these spiteful feelings make people resent me
I'm not making any progress
I'm just walking backwards
Looking forwards at the things I'm trying to reach

I feel so lonely and without pride
I have the feeling most days would be better for everyone if I just died
You could almost call this complaining
But its true, life isn't the same
I alwyas thought I'd grow up and be normal
But my face just won't fit that frame

So i'll stand up, rise once more
But like always my feelings will bring me back down to the floor
I hope no one has to feel like this
I hope no one ever has to go through what I've been through
A life of bitterness with nothing but feeling empty
I've grown out of hate, these spiteful feelings make people resent me
I'm not making any progress
I'm just walking backwards
Looking forwards at the things I'm trying to reach

And if I could I would give up
But I'm scared that if I do
Someone else might feel the same as me
I hope one day I get set free
But I can only hope
So for now I'll just suffer and let it be

So i'll stand up, rise once more
But like always my feelings will bring me back down to the floor
I hope no one has to feel like this
I hope no one ever has to go through what I've been through
A life of bitterness with nothing but feeling empty
I've grown out of hate, these spiteful feelings make people resent me
I'm not making any progress
I'm just walking backwards
Looking forwards at the things I'm trying to reach

[Dutchbeat]

Hi Sellon,

Good to see a post from you again!

These lyrics are very beautiful (yet very sad).

I am going to take these to the studio now and try and make our collaborative song....because we have a song contest to win!!!!!

[Kafla]

Good communication again Sellon

Sometimes I feel I am in that room with you

Keep writing and getting it out my freind

[The Corsair]

As always, deep and moving. This feels like it's fallen into cliche valley a few times, which is a shame (A life of bitterness with nothing but feeling empty, etc)

Also, you're a teenager right? Your profile doesn't have your age but I think I remember it being (comparatively) young. If you are youngish as I believe then do you not think that this situation has perhaps been blown out of proportion in your mind? I'm not trying to insult or discredit you or anything like that but mate, life is long. If you're as young as I think you are then these feelings are a waste of time. I know you can't just stop feeling them but you need to start finding ways to see through the murky cloud-cover of these thoughts and feelings.

[Sellon]

kaf, thanks it means lot
Dutch, thanks, and alright, good luck, hope you make something amazing
Corsair: I know I'm young (I'm 16) and all that, but it's not my fault, I have a mental illness, Schizo-affective disorder, it's basically Bipolar and schizophrenia in one,