hey guys, thanks for replying. sorry its taken me so long to get back to you but i wanted to wait until i could get in front of a computer to actually type a response, considering im always on mobile which can be challenging.
calia moko, the music is going somewhere when it happens, im just concerned that my lyrics seem contrived and childish because of the rhyme scheme that i pretty much always use unless something is meant to stand out in that way. i was hoping for another pair of eyes on it, and luckily i got them.
hardtwistmusic, it wasnt anything to do with more than the lyrics themselves really, they seemed easy and basic to me. compared to some of the songwriters i look up to, smashing pumpkins, violent femmes.
midiofnowhere, thanks for the feedback! i appreciate it! also your username is clever
scottlevi, wow, thanks man. thats a great compliment you have paid me, to say something just works. kind of lets me know of goin in the right direction