[HeyYou]

Hey I'd love to hear what you think about the lyrics and if I should do some changes and stuff, before Im going to record this... So tell me what you guys are thinking


I can't take it anymore
I can't get hurt that much
I don't wanna lose you
But I can't be with you with the knowing that you can't love me
The way I need you to

Losing the drugs effect
Now I see what I've always tried to escape
I don't wanna lose it
I don't wanna see the truth I don't wanna feel the pain
I just wanna be alone and get numb

So let me drink my alcohol
Let me snort another line
Let me forget the reality I don't wanna live it
I just want you to love me
But you can't then I don't wanna live this life
Just let me snort another line
I wanna be numb

I can't be happy without you
I'm just getting dying with any day passes by..
You don't know what it feels like
You don't know what it feels like
I just wanna feel your love even if it's just for today

So let me drink my alcohol
Let me snort another line
Let me forget the reality I don't wanna live it
I just want you to love me
But you can't then I don't wanna live this life
Just let me snort another line
I wanna be numb

He knows it but he doesn't care
He said he doesn't wanna do this anymore
That he doesn't wanna be the reason for my life
But he doesn't understand that isn't he's choice
I just want you to love me even if it just for today..

So let me drink my alcohol
Let me snort another line
Let me forget the reality I don't wanna live it
I just want you to love me
But you can't then I don't wanna live this life
Just let me snort another line
I wanna be numb

[HeyYou]

Up? *_*

[Paulski]

Hi there and welcome!
I'm going to be honest here so hope you take it with a grain of salt.
On the plus side the theme/title reminds me of "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd.
However I found it difficult to get through the entire song. I think it is because there seems to be no rhyming and no back-story. We don't know what his partner has done to hurt him so bad or anything about what happened to get him to this state. Also, we don't know who "he" is when you change the pronoun. So for me, I didn't care after a few verses. Sorry to be blunt - I think the theme could be developed to make this a great song!

Paul

BTW - you might get more comments if you review and offer help to other postings.

[Bleedin Boy]

I would have liked to have seen a bit of backstory here but I like how the chorus begins. I like the repeated line "you don't know what it feels like". Maybe by using more repetition or wordplay you might make the song have a bigger impact.