[Alan Starkie]

This is a new song I'm working on at the moment.

I've had to leave vocals because: 1 - haven't written them (only got very basic premise of 'i don't want to make the journey, I want to be there right now....' and 2 - had a stinking cold for past week (poor me...)

Guitars and bass are final versions. Everything else is a work in progress.

Thanks for criticisms/comments/views in general:

https://soundcloud.com/alanstarkie/the-journey_working-title

[monkfish79]

Yeah, cheers for that. I now have the doo doo doo's in the chorus firmly wedged in my subconscious...

All in all, sounds good! Personally, I'd crank the tempo up just a wee bit and the intro is maybe a tiny bit lengthy, but I'm guilty of that too...

Good work, though. It'll be good to hear with all the lyrics!

[S.T.C]

My major gripe is i like my rockmusic ,heavier .....but i suppose this is made for purpose....already i can tell this is going to be quite nicely polished when it`s complete...

For example i never really engaged with Def Leopard...except Animal..thats a good track...i Like Black Sabs.Creed,even Rainbow when the moments right......so it makes it difficult for me to engage with light rock,,,but i acknowledge it`s strengths.

[Alan Starkie]

Think Mylie Cyrus being punched in the teeth Steve.

[garys2811]

Hi Alan this is a good prospect. Good crunch on the guitar riff, I like the unison with that big fat bass and there’s the usual sparkle that you get on the acoustic guitar. The guitar solo has a classic Les Paul sound but I can’t pick up the other guitar sounds. The strings could do with a lot of development as you mentioned but I thought the drums were OK as they are.  The melody is very strong and it sounds hooky with that riff.

Suggestions?. it sounds a bit dated ( I know that something coming from me) but it has a lot of 80’s stadium band about it. Is there anything you could do to bring it up to date with out losing integrity?  What about doing a false end and bringing everything back in just as the final chord dies then go for a fade out. I know it’s cheesy  but it might work.

[Alan Starkie]

Hi Gary.

I can't let this song get any longer and I think a false ending would be an album track thing with the artist.

I think I'll prob cut the intro by half as suggested earlier.

I may bring some off beat kicks in to 'One direction' it slightly. I can see that working.

Useful comments. Thanks.

[Kafla]

It's interesting as it sounds so different to what you have posted but then you sing and it's sound just like you - I know it is you 

It seems effortless for you at times - the way you build an arrangement - piece it all together

You know if I was your producer I would love to bring in some weird sounds and take you right out of your comfort zone - beat you up a bit - insult you and get a reaction

But what can you say it's going to be prefect again

I really can't fault your writing and production 

[crystalsuzy]

Really nice...the arrangement...melody...vocals...guitar...lyrics...recording...everything sounds

awesome...I love it...I really don't have anything to offer other than that...thanks for sharing  

[Stylus]

Hi   I think this sounds very complete in other words  I can hear it on a radio station or somewhere it
has that quality & feel. I am listening to the overall song & find it ticks all the boxes.


                                                                              Stylus 

[Alan Starkie]

'You know if I was your producer I would love to bring in some weird sounds and take you right out of your comfort zone - beat you up a bit - insult you and get a reaction' -

Maybe at a later date? Thanks Kafla.

Thanks crystalsuzy - I've signed up to you on soundcloud :-)

Stylus - I've had a stinkin' cold for the past two weeks so lyrics/vocals are impossible at the mo. They just sound like Ernie from Sesame Street!

[habiTat]

Who needs words anyway 

It's so interesting to hear how everyone works differently, I always write lyrics first, I imagine it must be really hard to fit words to a completed track like this.

It sounds good to me, I can't think of any suggestions or advice.

btw I feel your pain with the stinking cold, I've had a cold, on and off, since October 

Great work, I look forward to hearing the finished song.

[Neil C]

Alan,
Amazing how you can make even 'do do' sound musically. I really got the 80's AOR feel of the chorus/guitar intro and usual quality verse.  I initially wasn't sure about dynamics moving from the guitar into the verses - other way really builds well, but having listened to it a few times i'm hooked.

Question - you typically have a very straightforward arrangement style alternating between verse and chorus, I'm wondering whether you could vary it ( perhaps introduced the chords used towards the end as a middle 8 ) to keep the listener on their feet?
Trust voice is back to top form - not that I'm jealous or anything...

Neil

[Alan Starkie]

Thanks HabiTat and Neil.

The cold's still stinkin. :-( no singing for me yet...

I appreciate your comments.

Alan.