[mickyplankton]

Hiya Folks,

Thought it might be fun (and possibly cathartic) to have a thread where we publish the songs we wish we had never written!

Lame, bad, dreadful, or just plain embarassing. Send them here!

I will start with this one: In London They Will Eat their Dead

What were we thinking!

https://soundcloud.com/mickyplankton/in-london-they-will-eat-their

[Skub]

Everything I've ever written,or ever will write,will be consigned to the dustbin of history.

So take your pick! 

[PaulAds]

Everything I've ever written,or ever will write,will be consigned to the dustbin of history.

So take your pick! 

Ha ha 

[PaulAds]

Just had a listen to that one, Mickey...it's a riot!

Definitely captures something...I really enjoyed it. Bit chaotic, like 

I think this was my most embarrassing one...written round about 1987...I've tried a couple of times over the years to make it less corny...but never managed it...but I've just finished the last version I'm ever doing of it.

https://soundcloud.com/thefuneralcrasher/conman-in-a-collar

It was meant to be a parody of "Let it Be" but it came out just awful. A bad idea, badly realised 

It's one of my less-charitable sentiments too...

[Sing4me88]

In some ways I kind think every song I've written is the worst ever in some way or other. Worst lyrically, worst concept wise, worst in terms of being put to music,worst in terms of appeal, worst in terms of artistic merit etc. There's probably one or two that are contenders for ticking all the worst boxes!

I'm actually working on lyrics and something approximating a trap chorus hook topline for one at the minute  that borders on the complete infantile - but fits in with a pretty dope and original hook. It's a f%£king calamity as a 'read' but it's aimed for a particular style and a particular artist so I think i 'works' as a song. It'd get slaughtered if posted in the lyrics section though   

[jacksimmons]

I think this was my most embarrassing one...written round about 1987...I've tried a couple of times over the years to make it less corny...but never managed it...but I've just finished the last version I'm ever doing of it.

https://soundcloud.com/thefuneralcrasher/conman-in-a-collar

It was meant to be a parody of "Let it Be" but it came out just awful. A bad idea, badly realised 

It's one of my less-charitable sentiments too...

I actually really like this ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I've not recorded loads of songs compared to how many I've written, but this from a few years back is pretty lame. it was my attempt at Bowie-esque new wave. I think there's a salvageable tune in there somewhere but the production raises hairs

https://soundcloud.com/blues101/all-the-girls-in-all-the-world-1/s-81x9p

[Skub]

Just had a listen to that one, Mickey...it's a riot!

Definitely captures something...I really enjoyed it. Bit chaotic, like  

I think this was my most embarrassing one...written round about 1987...I've tried a couple of times over the years to make it less corny...but never managed it...but I've just finished the last version I'm ever doing of it.

https://soundcloud.com/thefuneralcrasher/conman-in-a-collar

It was meant to be a parody of "Let it Be" but it came out just awful. A bad idea, badly realised  

It's one of my less-charitable sentiments too...

Maybe it's the sentiment in the song,but I enjoyed this,Paul. I am no fan of the collared shaman myself,so I connected.  

[redrhodie]

Just had a listen to that one, Mickey...it's a riot!

Definitely captures something...I really enjoyed it. Bit chaotic, like 

I think this was my most embarrassing one...written round about 1987...I've tried a couple of times over the years to make it less corny...but never managed it...but I've just finished the last version I'm ever doing of it.

https://soundcloud.com/thefuneralcrasher/conman-in-a-collar

It was meant to be a parody of "Let it Be" but it came out just awful. A bad idea, badly realised 

It's one of my less-charitable sentiments too...

I liked it, too. I think I've found my place here, on the island of misfit songs.

Lynn

[Sing4me88]

Came across this article today - it seems even some of the greats have this problem too:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/music/articles/08968b83-5d18-447a-8e46-ca0026bfdde0?intc_type=promo&intc_location=sport&intc_campaign=embarrassingsongs&intc_linkname=music_ent_article1

[PaulAds]

A good read...cheers for that!

[Morefrog Jones]

Just had a listen to that one, Mickey...it's a riot!

Definitely captures something...I really enjoyed it. Bit chaotic, like 

I think this was my most embarrassing one...written round about 1987...I've tried a couple of times over the years to make it less corny...but never managed it...but I've just finished the last version I'm ever doing of it.

https://soundcloud.com/thefuneralcrasher/conman-in-a-collar

It was meant to be a parody of "Let it Be" but it came out just awful. A bad idea, badly realised 

It's one of my less-charitable sentiments too...

And I took it it to new lows by trying a cover - 

https://soundcloud.com/morefrog-jones/funeral-chaser55678

[Mike67]

Physho Stalker, which was my first every song and first ever attempt at recording.  Makes me laugh out loud to this day.

M

[redrhodie]

Mine is probably a song I wrote about going to the beach called Drowning. Part of it goes:

Kid twirls his whistle around
on a string
He didn't notice
you were drowning

And that's my favorite part. Haha.

[PopTodd]

Mercifully, I don't have a recording of any of them, but there are absolutely a few contenders.
"Lend Yourself a Hand" was a song about masturbation.
"The Commissioner of Boredom" was just a Television Personalities ripoff that was barely a song.

But the absolute worst was something that I used to play for my drunk friends at parties when I was in college. It was called "Ragtime" and it was about... you guessed it... my girlfriend going through her menstrual time.

Samplee lyric (LANGUAGE WARNING):
"Can't have sex for a couple of days
Unless I want my cock to come out glazed"

Just awful.
At least I have youth as an excuse.

[redrhodie]

Mercifully, I don't have a recording of any of them, but there are absolutely a few contenders.
"Lend Yourself a Hand" was a song about masturbation.
"The Commissioner of Boredom" was just a Television Personalities ripoff that was barely a song.

But the absolute worst was something that I used to play for my drunk friends at parties when I was in college. It was called "Ragtime" and it was about... you guessed it... my girlfriend going through her menstrual time.

Samplee lyric (LANGUAGE WARNING):
"Can't have sex for a couple of days
Unless I want my cock to come out glazed"

Just awful.
At least I have youth as an excuse.

And we have a winner! Haha. That's truly awful.