[Soul Punk]

Hi guys

Newest.. work


I hope you enjoy reading it as much as i did writing

Colorblind

Just the other day I happened to see
a black man and women holding hands
while on their knees begging for pennys
in the ugly streets where they were born
I couldn't help but overhear the deafening silence
by the people who simply passed them by
It got me thinking.. what if the world was colorblind

Sorry sir I couldn't help but notice that ugly blue stain
on your pretty white collar..  did you forget where you came from
or do you just wish your past would hurry up and die
then again who am I to question you sir
I'm just your average everyday guy
You got me wishing.. The world was colorblind

I walked through the fields where many young men
fought for reasons they never quite understood
the big man needed his money so I guess you boys
better march off and rob that country over there
I guess you'll get homes fit for heros when you get back
or is not just heros fit for homes if they even survived
it doesn't matter to me which side your on
I pray that someday you'll be colorblind

Hey man I got something to show you mister
let's pretend for a little while that you're no better than I
is it really such a leap to ignore the colour of a mans skin
or care which god he prays to at night before he sleeps
does it really matter wether somes gay or straight
but then again who am I to speak my mind
as long as your ballot box rattles who cares anymore
You'll get my vote when your colorblind

[PointZero]

Very deep thinking here. I really like this, but I can't really get a feel for the rhythm. But the lyrics are fantastic. I like how it's in your face, but in a very subtle way. Thanks for sharing this!

[Soul Punk]

Thanks man

I appreciate it

any particular lines you loved/hated?

[PointZero]

"Hey man I got something to show you mister,
let's pretend for a little while that you're no better than I,
is it really such a leap to ignore the colour of a mans skin?
or care which god he prays to at night before he sleeps?"

That's probably my favorite. I don't really hate any lines to be honest.

[Soul Punk]

Thanks for your kind comments Zero

Its been a while since i went down this road of songwriting now I'm glad I did

Any more reviews guys

[Soul Punk]

Sorry to double post..

I have a good opportunity to record and to be honest theres alot of ways i could take this song

In addition to a review any opionions on how I should take thiss song composition wise?
I openly admit i prefer lyrics to composing but thats just me ..

thanks

[TNMC]

Hi,

Liam here, one half of TNMC/Neverwas,

I'm a lyrics man myself as well so I'm not going to be much use to you, Andy the other half of TNMC/Neverwas looks after the music thankfully! From the lyrics point of view I really liked them, a couple of top quality lines.
I can't feel the rhythm either to be honest, the verse lengths go from 6 to 7 to 8 lines which I'm struggling with but that may well become clear when I hear the recording, I am looking forward to hearing it.
Thanks for sharing,
 
Liam.