I loved the first three stanzas. I thought they were incredible. They were gritty, real sounding, dramatic, and created true empathy for the protagonist. From there, it all wrapped up too neatly, and turned around too completely to feel real to me. I'm not sure what to suggest, but I suspect you told too much of the story, and should have left more ambiguity and left us to wonder how it turned out at least a little.
Now, that's just one person's perspective, and criticism from only one person is of no value. If you can get others to weigh in, you will have something of value. Criticism is like evidence. You need a 'preponderance of evidence' to prove a point. In the same way, you need a 'preponderance of critical opinions' to be of enough value to consider using the criticism.