The Songwriter Forum - songwriting reviews, tips and chat
Songwriter Forum => Feedback on Finished songs => Topic started by: Paulski on December 02, 2018, 03:53:19 AM
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Hey - it's December - so I'm allowed one slice of Christmas cheese, right? :)
Pretending You're Still Here (https://soundcloud.com/paulcanuck/pretending-youre-still-here-this-christmas)
People push through the shops
To get everything bought
And the mall's playing holiday tunes
I hurry to find
All the things that you like
I'll keep them hidden from sight
Until I'm back in our room
And when I sit by the fire this Christmas
I'll have your presents wrapped, under the tree
But, you're not going to phone
To say that you're coming home
So I'll pretend that you're still here with me
I'll imagine a meal
Like we have every year
And we'll find something good on TV
Then with sleepy eyelids
We'll go up to our bed
I know it's all in my head
But you'll be right there with me
And when I sit by the fire this Christmas
I'll have your presents stacked under the tree
A heart finds a way
To carry on when it breaks
So I'll pretend that you're still here with me
There's a price to be paid
When life is taken away
So heaven must have needed you bad
When December is done
I'll come to grips with this loss
But for now I'll hang on
To the love that we had
You know my heart found a way
To get me through Christmas day
By pretending you're still here with me
My heart found a way
To get me through Christmas day...
I'll just pretend that you're still here with me
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Loved the chord changes here, really fresh and interest-keeping.
And not one but two reveals in the lyrics - that’s a present for us...
Not to mention the BVs. Really enjoyed it (who doesn’t enjoy a little / lot of melancholy?!)
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Ah, sitting on the porch in my rocking chair looking at the falling snow.. wait, that's cold!
Anyway, a country Christmas song with all the Paulski trademarks and even a guitar solo at that, can't imagine Santa will be able to top that.
Yet another classic, bravo!
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I have an absolute rule NOT to listen to Xmas songs but as it's you @Paulski (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19241) I'll make an exception. You do this sort of song so well. It's as cheesy as some well ripened camembert that has been left somewhere too warm but I thought that it was excellent :) HAPPY CHRISTMAS PAUL ;D
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Wow that was SAD! ;) Yeah, I guess it is cheesy Christmas personified, a clever mix of quality, old time vocals, ballad style melody and sentimental lyrics that tug on the heart strings.
As an aside, I was reading that it is hard to get big Christmas Hits these days, due to streaming etc, and the fact that major artists don't seem to be rushing to put Christmas songs out anymore, as on their own they don't really make anybody rich these days. Compared to the 70s and 80s, well how many Christmas songs come to mind? That said, in an earlier time this one has all the ingredients to have been a Christmas classic, and I for one really miss hearing loads of new Christmas songs come early December - it's less fun that we have to keep digging out the same old tunes, year in, year out!
Happy Christmas and thanks for a NEW Christmas song! ;D
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You are so good at these kinda songs..you should be writing for stage shows mate..beyond critique really..it's so right for a Christmas song..
Best, Kevin :)
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Hi Paul,
Yep, I agree with shadowfax. You should be up there with Lloyd Webber and co. Gloriously, professionally cheesy.
M
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Ah you guys are too kind, but I guess it is just about the holiday season.. ;D
@adamfarr (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20124) - thanks Adam glad you liked the progression. I was trying to write a song that went to the tonic for the chorus, then back to the dominant for the verse (which was a challenge ;D)
@Jambrains (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19875) - cheers Johan - I'm sure Santa could write sth even cornier, but maybe not ;D
@pompeyjazz (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20269) - same to you and yours John. Glad you like some cheese this time of year.
@MichaelA (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=21274) thanks Michael. Yep not much new anything being written for xmas these days. Same old TV shows too which are getting a bit tired. Cheers for the kind words.
@shadowfax (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20024) thanks Kevin. Happy you caught some xmas vibe. ;D
@montydog (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18653) - Lloyd Webber and me in the same sentence - made my day! Thanks for that Alan.
.. and a merry xmas to all who toughed it out all the way to the end. ;D
Paul
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Wow - such a great song.. And what a sad song too.. love when it moves to piano only (FAB piano btw - nothing new there :)).. The whole thing is very polished but the lyric is the star for me.. that and the sentiment.. love it @Paulski (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19241) !
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A song made for Christmas.
Should be on a TV Xmas Special, will play again, but first going to get my glass of mulled wine and find some presents to unwrap.
A great listen.
Sandeep
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Awesomeness
Well crafted harmonies and captivating piano work as usually, loved the diminished run towards the end.
Catchy melody as usual, well done.
Only thing I would alter is the hi hats when they come in around 0:56. They sound rather synthetic compared to the rest. I think they need a bit of dynamic shaping. Loud/soft kind of thing, rather than same sounding sample each time. I might even try out a ride cymbal instead.
This is so minor compared to the majesty of the rest of it though.
Merry Christmas.
Yodasdad
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Aww...me fellow cheesy Canadian :D What a Sweet, but very sad Christmas song :) It's perfect in every way, although it has a bit of a
country vibe going on, but I didn't even mind that ;) The lyrics are what make this song for me, cause I know it's personal for you :'(
Your vocal delivery is amazing as always, as are the BVs. You've down a fantastic job on production, and I agree, get this on the radio :)
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@MonnoDB (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19820) - thanks for the kind words. Glad you liked the ivories - my go-to instrument. ;D
@Movin Flavour (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=20528) - cheers Sandeep. Glad you got some xmas vibes even if it is a sad lyric. :'(
@Yodasdad (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=19208) - thanks for that - good point on the drums - they need some tweaking for sure. Impressed you recognized a dim7 arpeggio - not sure I would have ;D
@crystalsuzy (http://www.songwriterforum.co.uk/index.php?action=profile;u=18947) - thanks Suzy - not a personal situation thankfully but glad it came across that way ;D
.. thanks to all for listening and commenting and to all a happy holiday season - stay warm! ;D ;D
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He Paul,
You're such a talented writer. You could be a Tin Pan Alley songwriter, sitting in a small room with your piano, note book and pen, churning out songs to order. This is everything that I expect from you. It's melodic, well structured and has real purpose I can only admire your craft. Quality production too.
Merry Christmas my friend.
Paul
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real goodie
like the idea tho it be sad but its warm sad..
fit for christmas
your singing great..
love the arrangmnt, the changes..
fine song paul
happy new year canada