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Songwriter Forum => Lyrics => Topic started by: Jackdaw on May 17, 2017, 03:39:34 PM

Title: My first go at Songwriting - The Wings of my Soul
Post by: Jackdaw on May 17, 2017, 03:39:34 PM
I LISTEN

I listen to the wings
To the wings of my Soul
Where they fly me
I don't care
Maybe god only knows.

I've lay upon the setting Sun
And sat upon the Moon
I've never had no place to run
But I know I'll get there soon.

I listen, yes I listen
To my heart, soul and mind
I listen, yes I listen
Because it's You that'll find.

I listen to the strings
To the strings of my Heart
And its melodies and notes
They just tear me apart.

I've danced upon the Devil's lake
Pirouetted Sands of Time
I've never had a Love forsake
And I hope that You'll stay mine.

I listen, yes I listen
To my heart, soul and mind
I listen, yes I listen
Because it's You that I will find.

I listen to the thoughts
To the thoughts within my Mind
They bewitch me with Your face
But I know that love is blind
 
I've trecked the trails lost inTime
Sailed seven Seas of blue
And I know that at my journey's end
That I'll be home with You.
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting
Post by: Jackdaw on May 17, 2017, 05:13:08 PM
My song was inspired by the lyrics of  'WIND' by Cat Stevens.
But my singer songwriter icon is Bob Dylan.

I myself prefer to 'ghostwrite' books nowadays and write or compose the odd lines of odes come poetry.

Jackdaw1888 :-)

Ps...
Oh Very Young by mister C S is a classic piece of art come poetry come songwriting.
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting
Post by: Ramshackles on May 18, 2017, 01:20:06 PM
I quite like the lyrics but some of them maybe come a little to close to the 'wind' inspiration?

e.g.:

Yours:
I listen to the wings
to the wings of my soul
Where they fly me
I don't care
Maybe god only knows.


Cat Stevens:
I listen to the wind
To the wind of my soul
Where I'll end up well I think,
Only God really knows


Yours:
I've lay upon the setting Sun

Cat Stevens:
I've sat upon the setting sun



Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting
Post by: Jackdaw on May 18, 2017, 01:53:24 PM
I quite like the lyrics but some of them maybe come a little to close to the 'wind' inspiration?

e.g.:

Yours:
I listen to the wings
to the wings of my soul
Where they fly me
I don't care
Maybe god only knows.


Cat Stevens:
I listen to the wind
To the wind of my soul
Where I'll end up well I think,
Only God really knows


Yours:
I've lay upon the setting Sun

Cat Stevens:
I've sat upon the setting sun





Agreed. But I wrote it in efforts to try and expand upon Cat's very short original ditty which only has a few lines.
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting
Post by: Gill on May 18, 2017, 07:18:23 PM
I see the inspiration there from the two. I like it and is great for someone starting up on songwriting.  :D
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting
Post by: Jackdaw on May 18, 2017, 07:25:19 PM
I see the inspiration there from the two. I like it and is great for someone starting up on songwriting.  :D

Hey!!!

A big Thanks to you :-)

Jackdaw1888
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting
Post by: Gill on May 18, 2017, 08:02:16 PM
I see the inspiration there from the two. I like it and is great for someone starting up on songwriting.  :D

Hey!!!

A big Thanks to you :-)

Jackdaw1888



Just keep working on it going over and over and you'll be there in no time. Its all about fulfilling potential which you have  ;)
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting
Post by: Jackdaw on May 19, 2017, 12:01:43 AM
I see the inspiration there from the two. I like it and is great for someone starting up on songwriting.  :D

Hey!!!

A big Thanks to you :-)

Jackdaw1888



Just keep working on it going over and over and you'll be there in no time. Its all about fulfilling potential which you have  ;)

Thankyou for your advice and kind words.

Jackdaw1888 :-)
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting - The Wings of my Soul
Post by: Rosie1991 on June 05, 2017, 11:26:37 PM
This is a great , for your first time....but need to change the title.
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting - The Wings of my Soul
Post by: Jackdaw on June 05, 2017, 11:45:53 PM
This is a great , for your first time....but need to change the title.
Agreed.
Changed it!

Regards
Jackdaw :-)
Title: Re: My first go at Songwriting - The Wings of my Soul
Post by: Jackdaw on July 13, 2017, 09:43:51 PM
LISTEN

I listen to the Wings
To the Wings of my Soul
Where they fly me
I don't care
Maybe God only knows.

I've lay upon the setting Sun
And sat upon the Moon
I've never had no place to run
But I know I'll get there soon.

I've prayed to Gods on bended knee
But never never never
They never really answered me
No never never never.

I listen to the strings
To the strings of my Heart
And its melodies and notes
They just tear me apart.

I've danced upon the Devil's lake
Pirouetted Sands of Time
I've never had a Love forsake
And I hope that You'll stay mine.

I've prayed to Gods on bended knee
But never never never
They never really answered me
No never never never.

I listen to the thoughts
To the thoughts in my Mind
They bewitch me with Your face
But I know Love is blind.
 
I've trecked the trails lost inTime
Sailed seven Seas of blue
And I know that at my journey's end
That I'll be home with You.